OT: The Thread About Nothing

[Bleedred]

Life is absolutely crazy sometimes. My grandmother passed away in January and her house was put up for sale. She and my grandfather were the only people who ever lived there. Found out today my friend's mom bought it and he'll be living there for a while too. Wild.

That's crazy! I've heard of stuff like this happening before. I remember going out with one girl who lived at this place where I knew like a bunch of other people had lived before she lived there. She said the same thing too. ''Everyone I know has known someone who lived here before I did!''. It was strange.

 

[Bleedred]

I drove into Florida near Tallahassee, down to Tampa on Rt. 98, and then across to West Palm. It felt as vast and endless as Texas.

Fun map tidbit: Atlanta is closer to Chicago than it is to Miami.

Atlanta is a little bit closer to Miami than Chicago (not by much) if you drive, but I'm guessing as far as actual miles go that Chicago might be closer to Atlanta than Miami? And not driving miles/hours?

When we drove to Orlando in April we left Nj the night before. Making good time and I got all excited once we got to the Florida line. Then I realized we still had like 4 hours left. Florida is such a long state.

It definitely is. @Cage Helmet and I live 4 hours apart from one another. He's in Jacksonville and I'm right outside St Petersburg/Clearwater. The arena in Sunrise is like almost 4 hours from me, and it's also around 4 hours from him. Even though he lives at the top of the state and I live in the middle.

 

[Billdo]

Fun map tidbit: Atlanta is closer to Chicago than it is to Miami.

I wish this were true. Google says Miami is like less than a hundred miles closer but the fact that it's even that close is crazy to me.

 

[Bleedred]

I wish this were true. Google says Miami is like less than a hundred miles closer but the fact that it's even that close is crazy to me.

Yeah that’s what I found too. There’s a site that measures nautical miles and actual miles, I forget what it is and it’s too late for me to dig and mess around trying to find it. If we used those, it might tell us that Chicago is in fact fewer miles from Atlanta that Miami, but driving miles it’s not. It’s kind of like when you use an app and it tells you a certain locale or landmark is 32 miles from you, but it’s really like 44 miles from you if you drove there. Dating sites do this a lot, I’ve noticed. It will tell me a certain town is 30 miles from me, yet it’s really more like 40-45 road miles away.

 

[Bleedred]

Speaking of dating sites, I went on a date with a woman I met off the bumble app tonight. The one where women have to message you first. Which I prefer, because I like knowing that a woman is definitely into me before pursuing her. That’s how I met this last one that I was with for a few months, because she initiated and pursued me when I would come into her work.

The one I met tonight was alright. I’d definitely like to see her again, but too early to say if I’d want anything serious with her. She lives about an hour away. Her house was a bit in shambles, it really needs to be rehabbed (not trying to judge too harshly) and it’s like in the middle of nowhere, about 10 or 11 long miles from civilization, on some backroad, with all kinds of curves and zig zags. But at least she doesn’t live with her son’s father or some other guy like the last one. Sadly, I don’t find women I connect with like the last one very often. I’ve only had 4-5 that I’ve even been as fond of as I was her and they’ve usually come years apart. Hopefully it won’t be another 5 years before I meet one I feel that way about again.

 

[Bleedred]

And on the topic of that other one that I had the falling out with 3 weeks ago. It looks like that’s over, for good, it’s done, the end. It sucks because if you saw my post from Wednesday that I made at the top of this page, I was really optimistic that things would work out, but 2018 has been such a brutal year for predictions for me, I would have lost everything I owned if I put actual money down on any of them.

She really disgusted me on Friday and has some balls. I called her up, asked her how her vacation was, how her son is doing, who I became attached to also. She talked for 15 f***in minutes about how he has a cough and has for the last 1.5 weeks, she thinks it’s either allergies or asthma. Talked about her vacation, talked to me the way she would have when things were going good with me, then when I brought up seeing her, she shot me down, told me she thought about it and doesn’t wanna see me anymore. I can’t believe she talked to me for 15 minutes, only to implode me like that! She did that when I tried to explain to her and apologize last time I talked to her. She’ll give you hope, then hit the dynamite button on you. I thought she was just being courteous and trying to listen when she did it the first time, but it was too coincidental after the second time. I then calmly (not shouting or nasty) told her I hated her. She then replied “See, that’s what I mean. Every time I say something you don’t agree with, you turn into a mean, nasty and terrible person”. I left the door open for her because I want things to work out, but I’m also not putting my life on hold for her. I’ve moved on. I love her son and I love hearing about him, but if I’m not gonna be a part of their life anymore, there’s no need to take about yourselves for 15 minutes with me. It would have been less insulting to say “He’s good, I’m good, but I don’t want you to know him and I don’t want you in our lives and I made up my mind!” After 2-5 minutes into the phone call and not when I tried to bring up seeing them 15 minutes in.

It would totally be her to message me in two weeks or a month or two and say “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. It was wrong of me! I hate myself for doing that to you” then answering back in her next reply “No, I still think we should keep our distance and I don’t wanna see you”.

 

[Ripshot 43]

And on the topic of that other one that I had the falling out with 3 weeks ago. It looks like that’s over, for good, it’s done, the end. It sucks because if you saw my post from Wednesday that I made at the top of this page, I was really optimistic that things would work out, but 2018 has been such a brutal year for predictions for me, I would have lost everything I owned if I put actual money down on any of them.

She really disgusted me on Friday and has some balls. I called her up, asked her how her vacation was, how her son is doing, who I became attached to also. She talked for 15 ****in minutes about how he has a cough and has for the last 1.5 weeks, she thinks it’s either allergies or asthma. Talked about her vacation, talked to me the way she would have when things were going good with me, then when I brought up seeing her, she shot me down, told me she thought about it and doesn’t wanna see me anymore. I can’t believe she talked to me for 15 minutes, only to implode me like that! She did that when I tried to explain to her and apologize last time I talked to her. She’ll give you hope, then hit the dynamite button on you. I thought she was just being courteous and trying to listen when she did it the first time, but it was too coincidental after the second time. I then calmly (not shouting or nasty) told her I hated her. She then replied “See, that’s what I mean. Every time I say something you don’t agree with, you turn into a mean, nasty and terrible person”. I left the door open for her because I want things to work out, but I’m also not putting my life on hold for her. I’ve moved on. I love her son and I love hearing about him, but if I’m not gonna be a part of their life anymore, there’s no need to take about yourselves for 15 minutes with me. It would have been less insulting to say “He’s good, I’m good, but I don’t want you to know him and I don’t want you in our lives and I made up my mind!” After 2-5 minutes into the phone call and not when I tried to bring up seeing them 15 minutes in.

It would totally be her to message me in two weeks or a month or two and say “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. It was wrong of me! I hate myself for doing that to you” then answering back in her next reply “No, I still think we should keep our distance and I don’t wanna see you”.

Bleed man, I’ve read I believe all of what you’ve posted regarding this girl and I will leave my reply short and sweet. If you guys are having nasty conversations with each other after only a few months and are already having these major issues where you have separated from each other then that tells you that this isn’t the right woman for you. Move on and never look back. The right woman for you will require a lot of compromise and certainly drive you crazy from time to time but she won’t be treating you the way you’ve described or be showing all the red flags that you’ve described over the past few weeks. You deserve better.

 

[The Wumpus]

I wish this were true. Google says Miami is like less than a hundred miles closer but the fact that it's even that close is crazy to me.

Looks like you're right. One of my favorite factoids, shattered.

 

[Darkauron]

And on the topic of that other one that I had the falling out with 3 weeks ago. It looks like that’s over, for good, it’s done, the end. It sucks because if you saw my post from Wednesday that I made at the top of this page, I was really optimistic that things would work out, but 2018 has been such a brutal year for predictions for me, I would have lost everything I owned if I put actual money down on any of them.

She really disgusted me on Friday and has some balls. I called her up, asked her how her vacation was, how her son is doing, who I became attached to also. She talked for 15 ****in minutes about how he has a cough and has for the last 1.5 weeks, she thinks it’s either allergies or asthma. Talked about her vacation, talked to me the way she would have when things were going good with me, then when I brought up seeing her, she shot me down, told me she thought about it and doesn’t wanna see me anymore. I can’t believe she talked to me for 15 minutes, only to implode me like that! She did that when I tried to explain to her and apologize last time I talked to her. She’ll give you hope, then hit the dynamite button on you. I thought she was just being courteous and trying to listen when she did it the first time, but it was too coincidental after the second time. I then calmly (not shouting or nasty) told her I hated her. She then replied “See, that’s what I mean. Every time I say something you don’t agree with, you turn into a mean, nasty and terrible person”. I left the door open for her because I want things to work out, but I’m also not putting my life on hold for her. I’ve moved on. I love her son and I love hearing about him, but if I’m not gonna be a part of their life anymore, there’s no need to take about yourselves for 15 minutes with me. It would have been less insulting to say “He’s good, I’m good, but I don’t want you to know him and I don’t want you in our lives and I made up my mind!” After 2-5 minutes into the phone call and not when I tried to bring up seeing them 15 minutes in.

It would totally be her to message me in two weeks or a month or two and say “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. It was wrong of me! I hate myself for doing that to you” then answering back in her next reply “No, I still think we should keep our distance and I don’t wanna see you”.

This just affirms everything most of us were saying. Glad it is over with, she is not worth your time or effort.

 

[njdevils1982]

And on the topic of that other one that I had the falling out with 3 weeks ago. It looks like that’s over, for good, it’s done, the end. It sucks because if you saw my post from Wednesday that I made at the top of this page, I was really optimistic that things would work out, but 2018 has been such a brutal year for predictions for me, I would have lost everything I owned if I put actual money down on any of them.

She really disgusted me on Friday and has some balls. I called her up, asked her how her vacation was, how her son is doing, who I became attached to also. She talked for 15 ****in minutes about how he has a cough and has for the last 1.5 weeks, she thinks it’s either allergies or asthma. Talked about her vacation, talked to me the way she would have when things were going good with me, then when I brought up seeing her, she shot me down, told me she thought about it and doesn’t wanna see me anymore. I can’t believe she talked to me for 15 minutes, only to implode me like that! She did that when I tried to explain to her and apologize last time I talked to her. She’ll give you hope, then hit the dynamite button on you. I thought she was just being courteous and trying to listen when she did it the first time, but it was too coincidental after the second time. I then calmly (not shouting or nasty) told her I hated her. She then replied “See, that’s what I mean. Every time I say something you don’t agree with, you turn into a mean, nasty and terrible person”. I left the door open for her because I want things to work out, but I’m also not putting my life on hold for her. I’ve moved on. I love her son and I love hearing about him, but if I’m not gonna be a part of their life anymore, there’s no need to take about yourselves for 15 minutes with me. It would have been less insulting to say “He’s good, I’m good, but I don’t want you to know him and I don’t want you in our lives and I made up my mind!” After 2-5 minutes into the phone call and not when I tried to bring up seeing them 15 minutes in.

It would totally be her to message me in two weeks or a month or two and say “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. It was wrong of me! I hate myself for doing that to you” then answering back in her next reply “No, I still think we should keep our distance and I don’t wanna see you”.

sucks being shot down but you'll see in time that this one wasnt worth the effort

 

[AfroThunder396]

Wait...I didn't initially catch the "PhD in Marine Biology"....that's even more awesome!
What a place to be a marine biologist...from Okeechobeee straight on down throuh the Everglades that is an incredible ecosystem....Is the red tide issue a hot topic for you now? I'm pretty interested in sugarcane run off issue and the subsequent algea issues...anyway fascinating place and a wonderfully unique environment. Sounds like you are about to have an amazing experience.

My adviser studies Gulf Toadfish, specifically chemical communication in them. Toadfish are one of the only fish species to use vocal communication, but when predators are around they switch to chemical communication by secreting urea from their gills. This release of urea is mediated by serotonin, which is what I'll be studying. How the fish uses serotonin, where serotonin localizes in the animal, serotonin release under different stress conditions, etc.

One of the reasons for studying them is due to manufacturing runoff. There are a lot of pharmaceutical companies that dump into the ocean, which can mess with their SSRI's and in turn really screw up these Toadfish. We actually give the fish Prozac to see how it influences their communication.

 

[njdevils1982]

My adviser studies Gulf Toadfish, specifically chemical communication in them. Toadfish are one of the only fish species to use vocal communication, but when predators are around they switch to chemical communication by secreting urea from their gills. This release of urea is mediated by serotonin, which is what I'll be studying. How the fish uses serotonin, where serotonin localizes in the animal, serotonin release under different stress conditions, etc.

One of the reasons for studying them is due to manufacturing runoff. There are a lot of pharmaceutical companies that dump into the ocean, which can mess with their SSRI's and in turn really screw up these Toadfish. We actually give the fish Prozac to see how it influences their communication.

feed them LSD and see what happens

 

[Bleedred]

Thanks guys.

Still f***in hurts. Like this still hurts a lot. I'm not frustrated, I'm not mad, I'm not annoyed, I'm just hurt by it. I've been frustrated, mad, annoyed, etc, a lot over various women, but I think I've only been hurt like this 4-5 other times in my adult life. Only probably two of them of them were worth being hurt over. One of them definitely. Maybe I just shouldn't get attached to people. It's almost never worth it.

 

[njdevils1982]

Thanks guys.

Still ****in hurts. Maybe I just shouldn't get attached to people. It's almost never worth it.

cmon, im a terrible pessimist and even i wouldnt go that far

 

[Bleedred]

cmon, im a terrible pessimist and even i wouldnt go that far

Like I said, it only has been worth the hurt for like 2 of them. Definitely one of them.

No regrets, just sucks when everything goes to shit.

 

[Ripshot 43]

My adviser studies Gulf Toadfish, specifically chemical communication in them. Toadfish are one of the only fish species to use vocal communication, but when predators are around they switch to chemical communication by secreting urea from their gills. This release of urea is mediated by serotonin, which is what I'll be studying. How the fish uses serotonin, where serotonin localizes in the animal, serotonin release under different stress conditions, etc.

One of the reasons for studying them is due to manufacturing runoff. There are a lot of pharmaceutical companies that dump into the ocean, which can mess with their SSRI's and in turn really screw up these Toadfish. We actually give the fish Prozac to see how it influences their communication.

I’ve heard the news of our terrible outbreak of Red Tide has gone nation wide. Have you heard of this? Many think it’s due to a large sugar plant that dumps into a connected waterway. It’s pretty insane down here for an area that relies on tourism this time of the year, let alone year round.

 

[OmNomNom]

Thanks guys.

Still ****in hurts. Like this still hurts a lot. I'm not frustrated, I'm not mad, I'm not annoyed, I'm just hurt by it. I've been frustrated, mad, annoyed, etc, a lot over various women, but I think I've only been hurt like this 4-5 other times in my adult life. Only probably two of them of them were worth being hurt over. One of them definitely. Maybe I just shouldn't get attached to people. It's almost never worth it.

most relationships suck when they end, of COURSE you're still attached to the son, and to her to some extent.

i was attached to my ex as well, along w her family and friends, and wanted them to do well. the way it ended was terrible since she basically cheated on me, so getting over it hasn't been easy (1.5 years), but dating around does help you sort through your feelings.

i mean, just because your first bumble date didn't make you feel "THAT" way doesn't mean you won't find someone like that (and i know you know that as well). but don't bog yourself down with thoughts of failure and loss just because you didn't reel in a great match the first time around, since hopping back to the dating scene. there's still plenty of fish

 

[Billdo]

Looks like you're right. One of my favorite factoids, shattered.

I know, I was kinda bummed it wasn't legit because I told this dude I was with and he believed it. Now I'm a liar.

 

[Ripshot 43]

@Bleedred also remember that as much as you feel alone with what’s going on, there are millions that know the way you feel.

My friend just a few weeks ago couldn’t get ahold of his wife of 7 years one day while he was at work. He finally goes home to find his house randsacked. Everything gone besides his bedroom furniture. She finally answers and tells him that she’s leaving him (with the kids), and that she already has another place. Come to find out, 10 cars pulled up to his house about 30 minutes after he left for work and they just swept through the house like a SWAT team taking everything. How lovely that must’ve been for his children to witness that.

 

[njdevils1982]

@Bleedred also remember that as much as you feel alone with what’s going on, there are millions that know the way you feel.

My friend just a few weeks ago couldn’t get ahold of his wife of 7 years one day while he was at work. He finally goes home to find his house randsacked. Everything gone besides his bedroom furniture. She finally answers and tells him that she’s leaving him (with the kids), and that she already has another place. Come to find out, 10 cars pulled up to his house about 30 minutes after he left for work and they just swept through the house like a SWAT team taking everything. How lovely that must’ve been for his children to witness that.

now thats brutal……its one thing if someone isnt into you to begin with but to come home to that…….wow

 

[Billdo]

@Bleedred also remember that as much as you feel alone with what’s going on, there are millions that know the way you feel.

My friend just a few weeks ago couldn’t get ahold of his wife of 7 years one day while he was at work. He finally goes home to find his house randsacked. Everything gone besides his bedroom furniture. She finally answers and tells him that she’s leaving him (with the kids), and that she already has another place. Come to find out, 10 cars pulled up to his house about 30 minutes after he left for work and they just swept through the house like a SWAT team taking everything. How lovely that must’ve been for his children to witness that.

Jesus that's nuts

 

[Ripshot 43]

now thats brutal……its one thing if someone isnt into you to begin with but to come home to that…….wow

Jesus that's nuts

What makes it even worse is that the night before this all went down, they were sitting on the couch together and she had her feet on his lap letting him massage her.

Heartless is the perfect work I’d say.

 

[Ripshot 43]

Whoops double again

 

[Billdo]

What makes it even worse is that the night before this all went down, they were sitting on the couch together and she had her feet on his lap letting him massage her.

Heartless is the perfect work I’d say.

He was completely blindsided? Or were they having problems?

 

[Bleedred]

@Bleedred also remember that as much as you feel alone with what’s going on, there are millions that know the way you feel.

My friend just a few weeks ago couldn’t get ahold of his wife of 7 years one day while he was at work. He finally goes home to find his house randsacked. Everything gone besides his bedroom furniture. She finally answers and tells him that she’s leaving him (with the kids), and that she already has another place. Come to find out, 10 cars pulled up to his house about 30 minutes after he left for work and they just swept through the house like a SWAT team taking everything. How lovely that must’ve been for his children to witness that.

Good god.

I'm glad I never married or had kids, even though that's probably a very isolated incident.

Holy f***, how he's doing?

 

[Bleedred]

What makes it even worse is that the night before this all went down, they were sitting on the couch together and she had her feet on his lap letting him massage her.

Heartless is the perfect work I’d say.

Yikes. Just minutes before our blowout, I was rubbing her head. What really sucks is that I won't soon forget how happy and relaxed she looked while I was doing it. Only to really hurt her just minutes later. I'm sure she was really hurt too, she probably just got over it faster.

 

[Ripshot 43]

He was completely blindsided? Or were they having problems?

He’s dealing with it like he was but this has definitely been a long time coming. For about 3 years now they’ve had bickering issues stemming all from her meeting 2 new friends that she decided she wanted to be able to go out to bars and clubs with every weekend. Now while I understand not everyone is like him or I but I find that to be disgusting and unacceptable for someone with 2 kids at home, 1 being a 3 year old. That was only the tip... everything began to change for them despite her being very happy before meeting these new, single friends.

Good god.

I'm glad I never married or had kids, even though that's probably a very isolated incident.

Holy ****, how he's doing?

Marriage and kids definitely would complicate matters.

He’s doing ok. It’s so strange... he went through the different “stages of grief” within like 2 days and then got himself on every dating app known to man. I’ve warned him to take his time, as I think he’s ignoring the proper healing process but now I’ve just backed off and let him do his thing.

Yikes. Just minutes before our blowout, I was rubbing her head. What really sucks is that I won't soon forget how happy and relaxed she looked while I was doing it. Only to really hurt her just minutes later. I'm sure she was really hurt too, she probably just got over it faster.

I think somewhere along the line I missed what you did Bleed. Some people get over things faster but some people also hide their feelings better.