Miscellaneous NHL Talk XXVIII - You Talkin' about PLAYOFFS!?

[klutch]

We are attempting to summon the eldritch hockey gods. You know, these guys:

I will also try to bring these guys as well -

 

[Striiker]

We are attempting to summon the eldritch hockey gods. You know, these guys:

Horrifying

 

[Beef Invictus]

Horrifying

Each god is known by the emblematic growth sprouting from their skull.

Lord of Puck: Sovereign of all, Sire of bounces fortunate or ill, wherever they may occur. He is chief among all hockey gods.

Lord of Post: Dux Relevii (Duke of Relief) and also Deacon of Despair, he holds both positions with great lust. He decides along with the Lord of Puck if those post and crossbar shots enter the sacred land, or if they do spring elsewhere, making all mortal hearts skip.

Lord of Glass: The Basileus of Confusion. All strange hops from stanchions, boards, and glass are his to decide, with ultimate approval from the Lord of Puck. San Jose fans cry and gnash their teeth at the mere thought of him.

Lord of Inhibiting: Jester to Fools. He has always preached that goalies should do nought but stop pucks. He proclaimed a triangle should be placed around the net, within which goaltenders could touch the puck; however, he preached that they should be slashed to death if they ever leave and burnt in a fire fueled by the broken wooden sticks of old should they touch the puck outside the triangle. He gained much leverage during the Dying Time of 2005. Fortunately, the other three Lords hate him and only granted him half a triangle, dubbed thusly as Trapezoid, and removed his harshest rules. They beat him with socks full of coins at night.


Out of frame:

Lord of Carbon: Landgrave of Disaster, with but a thought he breaks sticks at inopportune times. He is the one taking the picture. He's a prankster!

 

[Striiker]

Each god is known by the emblematic growth sprouting from their skull.

Lord of Puck: Sovereign of all, Sire of bounces fortunate or ill, wherever they may occur. He is chief among all hockey gods.

Lord of Post: Dux Relevii (Duke of Relief) and also Deacon of Despair, he holds both positions with great lust. He decides along with the Lord of Puck if those post and crossbar shots enter the sacred land, or if they do spring elsewhere, making all mortal hearts skip.

Lord of Glass: The Basileus of Confusion. All strange hops from stanchions, boards, and glass are his to decide, with ultimate approval from the Lord of Puck. San Jose fans cry and gnash their teeth at the mere thought of him.

Lord of Inhibiting: Jester to Fools. He has always preached that goalies should do nought but stop pucks. He proclaimed a triangle should be placed around the net, within which goaltenders could touch the puck; however, he preached that they should be slashed to death if they ever leave and burnt in a fire fueled by the broken wooden sticks of old should they touch the puck outside the triangle. He gained much leverage during the Dying Time of 2005. Fortunately, the other three Lords hate him and only granted him half a triangle, dubbed thusly as Trapezoid, and removed his harshest rules. They beat him with socks full of coins at night.


Out of frame:

Lord of Carbon: Landgrave of Disaster, with but a thought he breaks sticks at inopportune times. He is the one taking the picture. He's a prankster!

 

[Sombastate]

What an absolutely embarrassing goal.

 

[Domino666]

Chi taking care of business

 

[Hot Water Bottle]

Have you held one before? Did you hold one with JTown and a Hatcher in attendance as they seem to be possessed about the non upside of Couturier.

I wish you luck. If you ever come to Halifax, Nova Scotia, I can take you to the graveyard where Titanic non-survivors are buried. They don't like ice much.

Thank you so much!!! I really appreciate your and everyone else's support. It's given me lots of inspiration for making contact with the hockey spirits from the other side.

I just tried a simple seance as an experiment. The rumors are correct that anyone can do it themselves in a darkened room by playing a Led Zeppelin vinyl album backward (the band members were all powerful magicians). I mostly just got mumbling and static, but I was able to make a brief contact with one of the original Ottawa Senators from the 1800s. All he did was comment on the netting over the goals, so I'm considering that a failed experiment for now... need to bring in reinforcements for next time.

I will definitely let you know next time I'm in Nova Scotia and we can improvise an outdoor seance at a spot that you choose. Besides the tragedy of the Titanic, there is also some powerful magic in the ground related to the ancient Micmac tribes from Nova Scotia. I'm not sure yet if those spirits have any interest in hockey though.

 

[Tripod]

We can also take a 30 minute drive down to the birthplace of hockey...Windsor, N.S. I'm sure we can get some chatter from down there.

Boy this feels like an offseason thread. lol.

 

[Hot Water Bottle]

Lord of Glass: The Basileus of Confusion. All strange hops from stanchions, boards, and glass are his to decide, with ultimate approval from the Lord of Puck. San Jose fans cry and gnash their teeth at the mere thought of him.

One interesting fact is that the Lord of Glass was depicted as "Jason Voorhees" in the Friday the 13th series of movies. He has a Dutch name because he represents the spirits of the Dutch settlers wiped out in the Anglo-Dutch Wars in upstate New York, which is what the Friday the 13th series is really all about.

 

[CodyTheHuman]

I don't really know what's going on in this thread, but I don't mind it.

 

[Striiker]

In non-demonic news.... what the **** Chicago?

 

[PALE PWNR]

Minny's a better team then they're given credit for.

 

[Sniped]

I don't really know what's going on in this thread, but I don't mind it.

I'm with ya.

 

[TCTC]

Minny's a better team then they're given credit for.

They could be this years version of the Kings from 2012. Everyone knew they had a good team, but no one really expected them to win the cup.

Although Dubnyk is not on Quick's level.

 

[Jtown]

this chicago minny game is great hope it goes OT

 

[sobrien]

I don't really know what's going on in this thread, but I don't mind it.

Just wait until we start talking about condiments...

 

[Striiker]

Just wait until we start talking about condiments...

The condiment thread and the milk thread were my two favorites.

 

[Sombastate]

The condiment thread and the milk thread were my two favorites.

I can't tell you how many random threads i've wandered in to, posted, and the response to me had something to do with mustard haha.

 

[Striiker]

I can't tell you how many random threads i've wondered in to, posted, and the response to me had something to do with mustard haha.

I hope you appreciate how often I see you post and have to refrain from mentioning mustard. It's hard on me... I really struggle with it.

 

[sobrien]

I hope you appreciate how often I see you post and have to refrain from mentioning mustard. It's hard on me... I really struggle with it.

Seconded.

 

[Sombastate]

You guys are sweethearts.

 

[Hot Water Bottle]

We can also take a 30 minute drive down to the birthplace of hockey...Windsor, N.S. I'm sure we can get some chatter from down there.

That is a fantastic idea - Winsdor it is!

Now to do a seance right, we need at least two high-priestesses to lead us through the chant and operate the Ouija board (or other items we may use instead - those things may be just too dangerous). I can bring most of the memorabilia but the women need to be local. How are the women in Winsdor?

 

[TheLegendkiller]

Flyers should get a little bit more size with skill throughout he line-up. Washington is loading up on size and I'm not about to see the Flyers pushed around by that limp dick team.

 

[Tripod]

That is a fantastic idea - Winsdor it is!

Now to do a seance right, we need at least two high-priestesses to lead us through the chant and operate the Ouija board (or other items we may use instead - those things may be just too dangerous). I can bring most of the memorabilia but the women need to be local. How are the women in Winsdor?

Can't say I know. The ones I know are my relatives. Good people.

Maybe you can put a profile on Plenty of Fish to see if you can find some with similar interests.

 

[Jtown]

ovi has been amazing this whole game.