OT: Relationship Advice Thread

[Taluss]

Can't remember if I posted in here before about my situation but I will for the hell of it since this thread just popped up.

So my situation. Im from Ottawa Onatrio and live there half the year. But my gf of 4 years lives in Queens NYC (long story). I live there half the year now. Its definitely tough, especially with covid. I can't drive down every week or so like I could before covid but we are making it work and its looking like a bright future of me living in NY eventually.

Some tips here. For starters: Be yourself, like Chytil said.

Understand your situation and who you are. Don't rush anything. It may take time and it will be worth it if he/she is the right one. You wont need to ask in here if they are. You will know.

Some stuff ive understood from experience, especially if your arguing.

Be understanding. Even if you don't understand their POV. Try to look at the situation the way they are. It helps

Don't argue with insults, argue with your point and how you feel. Arguments should turn into understanding of one another. Not insults.

Make sure you are there for them, Trust me, the small messages about how much you care matters.

Have "nights" for each other. Ik you may be busy but it certainly means a lot to them

THE SMALL STUFF MATTERS ESPECIALLY IF YOUR A GUY DATING A GIRL. Trust me she sees this stuff!!! Do the small stuff that matters!!

 

[Filip Chytil]

Hey baby I'm so confident in myself I have an obscure hockey and basketball analyst in my avatar on a hockey message board.

Oh, Filip Chytil take me now!

No thanks!

 

[Irishguy42]

I think that's what confidence really is. Being cool with who you are instead of trying to be something you're not. Just be who you are. Don't try to take on someone else's personality/sense of humor, just be you. Look at me. I'm a total lunatic, but that's who I am. A lunatic. A guy with Bill Pidto as his avatar.

But seriously, whoever you are as a person, just be that person. Don't take on a persona. If it works out, great. If not, even better. Last thing you want to do is act like someone you're not, keep up the charade, and end up in a relationship with someone thinking you're someone else. Been there, done that. No bueno. Just be you.

"Hey babe. I'll give you the fastest 150 seconds of your life when we get back to my place"

 

[will1066]

FODA: Scary new dating trend for singles after COVID-19

I love the photos. Just reeks of an Onion article.

 

[SnowblindNYR]

FODA: Scary new dating trend for singles after COVID-19

I love the photos. Just reeks of an Onion article.

FODA says get over it they must, huge p***yes they are.

 

[I Eat Crow]

FODA: Scary new dating trend for singles after COVID-19

I love the photos. Just reeks of an Onion article.

Oh my God this is exactly what I thought when I read the article before seeing your comment

 

[SnowblindNYR]

I signed up for this coed bowling team for 6 weeks. I don't know if this is meant for singles or as a dating thing (first time I saw the ad I thought it was) but I'm racking my brain figuring out how I can actually meet someone not on a dating app. Anyone have other ideas?

Better Off Bowling

 

[Taluss]

I signed up for this coed bowling team for 6 weeks. I don't know if this is meant for singles or as a dating thing (first time I saw the ad I thought it was) but I'm racking my brain figuring out how I can actually meet someone not on a dating app. Anyone have other ideas?

Better Off Bowling

First things that come to my mind are bars (easy way honestly, also a great test of your confidence with initiating convos). Another way (how I found my girl) is via friends who know other single people. Maybe at parties and stuff too? Ik a couple buds who found their girls that way

 

[Irishguy42]

First things that come to my mind are bars (easy way honestly, also a great test of your confidence with initiating convos). Another way (how I found my girl) is via friends who know other single people.

Yep.

These were the first two things I thought of, sadly.

Nowadays, bars and friends of friends are the best bets unless your hobbies/job dictate otherwise for travel/time-off. Though I must say...those were probably the best of bets a while ago too, in a broader pool that wasn't shrunken by the pandemic.

 

[SnowblindNYR]

First things that come to my mind are bars (easy way honestly, also a great test of your confidence with initiating convos). Another way (how I found my girl) is via friends who know other single people. Maybe at parties and stuff too? Ik a couple buds who found their girls that way

I don't have the guts to pick up or even talk to girls at bars but maybe if I get a wing.

 

[Irishguy42]

I don't have the guts to pick up or even talk to girls at bars but maybe if I get a wing.

Friends are always great in relationship-acquiring assistance, no matter the situation (be it a bar or other activity), just because they can get rid of the most important icebreaker: the introduction

 

[Taluss]

I don't have the guts to pick up or even talk to girls at bars but maybe if I get a wing.

Ask yourself man. What’s the worst that can happen if you talk to a girl. They tell you to f*** off? Don’t get me wrong Ik it’s not easy but you have to consider that. A wing would definitely help! Or a few drinks in ya

 

[Kocur26]

Don’t curse

Don’t ever put down each other’s family

Separate bank accounts to start

unlocked cellphones

 

[SnowblindNYR]

Ask yourself man. What’s the worst that can happen if you talk to a girl. They tell you to f*** off? Don’t get me wrong Ik it’s not easy but you have to consider that. A wing would definitely help! Or a few drinks in ya

I don't know, but it's rare they're by themselves.

 

[Taluss]

I don't know, but it's rare they're by themselves.

Maybe, but doesn't mean a conversation can't be initiated, It takes a ton of courage and confidence ik. But you have to believe in yourself and be yourself.

You seem like a good guy who really wants a true relationship. Some girls will really like that. It ain't easy, there's no trick to instantly make a relationship work. It just takes dedication, commitment and especially time to find the right one. Once you find her you will know.

 

[Taluss]

Don’t curse

Don’t ever put down each other’s family

Separate bank accounts to start

unlocked cellphones

Cursing is fine as long as its not insults to each other imo

Wait for unlocked cellphones until your in a serious relationship. Even then its not essential.

Agree completely with other 2 points

 

[will1066]

FODA says get over it they must, huge p***yes they are.

Took me a while but I finally got this lol

 

[SnowblindNYR]

Maybe, but doesn't mean a conversation can't be initiated, It takes a ton of courage and confidence ik. But you have to believe in yourself and be yourself.

You seem like a good guy who really wants a true relationship. Some girls will really like that. It ain't easy, there's no trick to instantly make a relationship work. It just takes dedication, commitment and especially time to find the right one. Once you find her you will know.

Thanks. There's a Russian saying "a good guy isn't a profession". Same thing here being a good guy isn't getting anyone romantically interested in me.

 

[The Crypto Guy]

I signed up for this coed bowling team for 6 weeks. I don't know if this is meant for singles or as a dating thing (first time I saw the ad I thought it was) but I'm racking my brain figuring out how I can actually meet someone not on a dating app. Anyone have other ideas?

Better Off Bowling

It will mostly be single people guaranteed. It will be fun, at worst you'll make some new friends. I'd rather do something like that than try and hit on girls at a bar.

I did the apps for YEARS.....after probably 100 first dates, I thankfully found the one 2 years ago, marrying her in Oct

 

[nyrage]

I signed up for this coed bowling team for 6 weeks. I don't know if this is meant for singles or as a dating thing (first time I saw the ad I thought it was) but I'm racking my brain figuring out how I can actually meet someone not on a dating app. Anyone have other ideas?

Better Off Bowling

Have you tried MeetUp? Tons of groups on there including ones for singles. They have pretty much have a group for every possible interest. Movies, trivia, dogs, hiking, walking, museums, sports teams, Rangers fans that like to bitch on forums about losing Buchnevich,etc. You'll meet people with similar interests. That's half the battle.

When I got divorced about 8 years ago, I dreaded being single, but I joined MeetUp and dating sites like Match. I basically had a date every night. It was so easy to meet women. At worst, you'll probably make some new friends.

 

[SnowblindNYR]

It will mostly be single people guaranteed. It will be fun, at worst you'll make some new friends. I'd rather do something like that than try and hit on girls at a bar.

I did the apps for YEARS.....after probably 100 first dates, I thankfully found the one 2 years ago, marrying her in Oct

Congrats!

 

[SnowblindNYR]

Have you tried MeetUp? Tons of groups on there including ones for singles. They have pretty much have a group for every possible interest. Movies, trivia, dogs, hiking, walking, museums, sports teams, Rangers fans that like to bitch on forums about losing Buchnevich,etc. You'll meet people with similar interests. That's half the battle.

When I got divorced about 8 years ago, I dreaded being single, but I joined MeetUp and dating sites like Match. I basically had a date every night. It was so easy to meet women. At worst, you'll probably make some new friends.

Ed Jovanovki isn't my type.

And yeah I've gone to a few events through New York Social Network, including two singles events. I've probably ended up not coming to more events than I went though. Something would pop up. But yeah was at a single event from there last Friday.

 

[romba]

Thanks. There's a Russian saying "a good guy isn't a profession". Same thing here being a good guy isn't getting anyone romantically interested in me.

Get ripped, then the good guy part all of a sudden becomes 'more interesting' to them

Bars aren't for everyone, the guy who mentioned the app with matches based on a variety of different interests sound like a great option- starting out with similar interests makes conversations flow more easily which always allowed me to be more confident to keep things moving forward. Then you sprinkle in other aspects, funny personal stories etc. and you've got what we call in the business the start of 'a relationship'.

 

[DialUp]

I signed up for this coed bowling team for 6 weeks. I don't know if this is meant for singles or as a dating thing (first time I saw the ad I thought it was) but I'm racking my brain figuring out how I can actually meet someone not on a dating app. Anyone have other ideas?

Better Off Bowling

This kind of stuff is EXACTLY where you should be meeting singles. If you drink though, the goal here is to get the group drinking or TO the bar afterwards. So you can get loose and chatty without having to cold open strangers. Have fun, if you are having it, others see it.

 

[SnowblindNYR]

This kind of stuff is EXACTLY where you should be meeting singles. If you drink though, the goal here is to get the group drinking or TO the bar afterwards. So you can get loose and chatty without having to cold open strangers. Have fun, if you are having it, others see it.

The bowling alley is a hybrid bar/bowling alley and I think that's the idea.