Movies: Last Movie You Watched and Rate It | Part#: Some High Number +4

Langdon Alger

Registered User
Apr 19, 2006
24,777
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I can't do it. Too uncomfortable.

Did you ever see Leaving Las Vegas or Adaptation? He did a great job in both those movies. Admittedly, I haven’t seen a ton of his films, but I do know he can be very good at times. Maybe he hasn’t always chose the best roles.
 

Osprey

Registered User
Feb 18, 2005
27,320
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The Beastmaster (1982) - 4/10 (Disliked it)

Discount Conan (Marc Singer), aka the Beast Whisperer, gets easily knocked unconscious when his village is destroyed, only to become an unstoppable killing machine when he seeks revenge... with the help of his animal friends and a Playboy Playmate. No toxic masculinity here, though. This He-Man is sensitive and even sheds a tear when a blind man calls him "a freak who speaks to animals." The truth apparently hurts even the strongest of warriors. Seriously, it has a little bit of charm, but this isn't a good movie. It's badly directed and edited. Some of the acting is very poor. It looks cheap and has very little plot. Conan the Barbarian, as corny as it is, looks a lot better in comparison. Even though it was released only two months after Conan the Barbarian and isn't a knockoff, this feels like one because almost everything is of lower quality. Still, the cheese makes it amusing in a "so bad it's good" or Mystery Science Theater 3000 way and it has some charm, as I said, so I can't really hate it. Fun fact: Dennis Miller once joked that HBO stood for "Hey, Beastmaster's On" because the network showed it so much in the 80s and early 90s. It's a mystery that I don't remember seeing it, even though I had HBO during that time. Then again, it seems like a movie that's easy to forget.
 
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ORRFForever

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Oct 29, 2018
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Did you ever see Leaving Las Vegas or Adaptation? He did a great job in both those movies. Admittedly, I haven’t seen a ton of his films, but I do know he can be very good at times. Maybe he hasn’t always chose the best roles.
LLV, of course, but, even then, I find him embarrassing.
 

ProstheticConscience

Check dein Limit
Apr 30, 2010
18,459
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Canuck Nation
Top Secret!

with a fresh-faced Val Kilmer, and other people

Often overlooked spy spoof from the team that brought us Airplane! and the Naked Gun series. In his first starring role, Kilmer stares vacantly out at the world as Nick Rivers, an American singing sensation brought over for East Germany's big cultural festival when Leonard Bernstein cancels, but it's all a big distraction for evil East Germany's plan to blow up the Allies' submarine fleet. Or something. In the same vein as the usual Zucker/Abrahams/Zucker fare from the 80's, the visual gags come fast and furious as Nick meets the comely Hilary (part of the French resistance), who's trying to rescue her scientist father from the Nazi-ish evil guys. Physical humour and quippy writing ensues.

One I fondly remember from my childhood once upon a time; just felt the need to watch it again. A notch down from the other movies I mentioned, mainly because Val Kilmer's no Leslie Nielsen, but still funny and still better than the vast, vast majority of modern comedies. It's silly, sophomoric, but still earnest. A lot of the visual humour is in the background and the closer you watch it the more you find. Becomes funnier if you speak German; Nick and Hilary dine at the swanky restaurant "Cafe Gay Urination", and a Gestapo henchman responds to his orders by shouting: "I love you, my treasure!"

top_secret_intruder_2.png

^^This part actually made the PG-13 version when it was released. Really. Different world back then...

*edit* The phrase "worth less than a truckload of dead rats in a tampon factory" is a joke from this movie that I still work into general conversation whenever the opportunity presents itself to this day.
 
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ORRFForever

Registered User
Oct 29, 2018
18,442
9,857
Top Secret!

with a fresh-faced Val Kilmer, and other people

Often overlooked spy spoof from the team that brought us Airplane! and the Naked Gun series. In his first starring role, Kilmer stares vacantly out at the world as Nick Rivers, an American singing sensation brought over for East Germany's big cultural festival when Leonard Bernstein cancels, but it's all a big distraction for evil East Germany's plan to blow up the Allies' submarine fleet. Or something. In the same vein as the usual Zucker/Abrahams/Zucker fare from the 80's, the visual gags come fast and furious as Nick meets the comely Hilary (part of the French resistance), who's trying to rescue her scientist father from the Nazi-ish evil guys. Physical humour and quippy writing ensues.

One I fondly remember from my childhood once upon a time; just felt the need to watch it again. A notch down from the other movies I mentioned, mainly because Val Kilmer's no Leslie Nielsen, but still funny and still better than the vast, vast majority of modern comedies. It's silly, sophomoric, but still earnest. A lot of the visual humour is in the background and the closer you watch it the more you find. Becomes funnier if you speak German; Nick and Hilary dine at the swanky restaurant " Cafe Gay Urination", and a Gestapo henchman responds to his orders by shouting: "I love you, my treasure!"

top_secret_intruder_2.png

^^This part actually made the PG-13 version when it was released. Really. Different world back then...

*edit* The phrase "worth less than a truckload of dead rats in a tampon factory" is a joke from this movie that I still work into general conversation whenever the opportunity presents itself to this day.
When I was a kid, I remember laughing until I cried when ??? walked funny after getting mounted...

 
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ProstheticConscience

Check dein Limit
Apr 30, 2010
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Canuck Nation
When I was a kid, I remember laughing until I cried when ??? walked funny after getting mounted...


"It was a Russian ship that rescued me! They taught me all about you Imperialist pigs! I was exposed to great thinkers like Marx! Lenin! L Ron Hubbard! Freddie Lincoln!


v1.bjs1MzYyNDA7ajsxODUwMTsxMjAwOzE5MjA7MTA4MA

I never noticed her bending down out of the shot and coming up with the tape measure like that until tonight, either. :laugh:
 
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Osprey

Registered User
Feb 18, 2005
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^^This part actually made the PG-13 version when it was released. Really. Different world back then...

Top Secret! was actually rated PG. In fact, it was in theaters at the same time as the also-PG Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, which we all know sparked a little controversy and led Spielberg to petition for a rating between PG and R, which the MPAA quickly came up with and first gave to Red Dawn later that Summer.

It was a different world back then. Coincidentally, I watched The Beastmaster last night, as I just said, which is also a PG movie, despite having 15 seconds of topless nudity, as well as burnt bodies skewered on stakes. You never knew what you would get with movies in the early 80s. Sometimes, the PG movies were more shocking or scary than the R-rated ones. My worst nightmares as a kid came from "children's" movies from that era. Those were dark times. At least we had good comedies.
 
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kihei

McEnroe: The older I get, the better I used to be.
Jun 14, 2006
42,768
10,313
Toronto
16549.large.jpg


Reality
(2012) Directed by Matteo Garrone 7A

Matteo Garrone’s follow up to the ultra-realistic organized crime movie Gomorrah is a very different story, a study of what reality television can do to desperate people. Luciano (Aniello Arena), a fishmonger with some charm but no talent, longs to be chosen to perform on Big Brother, a Naples based reality TV variety show. He convinces himself that he has a legit shot to become a contestant. His whole life seems to depend on it. He believes it is his only hope for the future. This self-imposed pressure makes him become delusional. He starts thinking the show is spying on him to see if he is worthy, so he changes his behaviour, buying food for strangers and even giving away his wife’s furniture. While waiting to learn whether he will become a contestant, he spirals ever further into madness, seemingly beyond the help of his family and friends. Reality has a noticeable King of Comedy vibe, and Arena’s performance of Luciano is worthy of Robert De Niro on one of his really good days. Garrone is obviously against how reality television and game shows can prey on the most vulnerable among us. Brilliantly, the director finds the perfect opening and closing sequences to bookend his movie and its title. Loud and raucous on occasion, at other times disheartening, Reality is a worthy successor to Gomorrah.

subtitles

MUBI
 

McOilers97

Registered User
Jan 10, 2012
6,512
6,695
This weekend I watched:

Lost Highway - David Lynch 1997
Enjoyed it - challenging movie that has Lynch's trademark surrealism all over it. Not a "fun" movie, but it had me very engaged and has stayed with me since finishing it.

Zero Dark Thirty - Kathryn Bigelow 2012
Well executed slow-burn with a strong performance from Chastain, and has a really well directed, thrilling final act.

North By Northwest - Alfred Hitchcock 1959
Working my way through Hitchcock's movies and this is just good, fun classic cinema. Rear Window is my favorite of his so far (still have to watch Vertigo), but this movie is pretty damn solid, and has clearly had a major impact on pop culture.
 
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Pranzo Oltranzista

Registered User
Oct 18, 2017
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Key4.jpg


The Key (Levy, 2014) - It's seems quite clear that Jefery Levy is an asshole, but contrarily to Polanski or Allen, not a very talented one. His version of The Key (an often adapted japanese novel) could have been interesting, but it's overinvestment in extradiegetic narration and it's inconsistent and patchy visual experimentation (sometimes gorgeous, sometimes hideous) kills any vibes that might have been going on. It certainly fails as an erotic film, and at most other things too. Levy kind of goes for a Greenaway feel to the project, but he doesn't have the chops to make it work. I haven't seen the japanese adaptations, but the Tinto Brass one is a lot better. 4.5/10
 

ORRFForever

Registered User
Oct 29, 2018
18,442
9,857
Top Secret! was actually rated PG. In fact, it was in theaters at the same time as the also-PG Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, which we all know sparked a little controversy and led Spielberg to petition for a rating between PG and R, which the MPAA quickly came up with and first gave to Red Dawn later that Summer.

It was a different world back then. Coincidentally, I watched The Beastmaster last night, as I just said, which is also a PG movie, despite having 15 seconds of topless nudity, as well as burnt bodies skewered on stakes. You never knew what you would get with movies in the early 80s. Sometimes, the PG movies were more shocking or scary than the R-rated ones. My worst nightmares as a kid came from "children's" movies from that era. Those were dark times.
I remember, as a kid, my friends and I wanted to go see "Hooper" with Burt Reynolds. I was NOT allowed to go because a woman pops out of the cake topless.

Those 1980's movies were indeed all over the map when it came to "movie ratings" - or whatever they're called.
 

Jevo

Registered User
Oct 3, 2010
3,489
370

Brand on the Brain!
(2006) Directed by Guy Madden 7B

I still can’t get it through my head that this guy is from Winnipeg.

I have never been to Winnipeg, by My Winnipeg is the entire basis of my perception of Winnipeg. I'm not sure if that's good or bad.
 

ProstheticConscience

Check dein Limit
Apr 30, 2010
18,459
10,107
Canuck Nation
I have never been to Winnipeg, by My Winnipeg is the entire basis of my perception of Winnipeg. I'm not sure if that's good or bad.
My wife's from Winnipeg, and I've had a number of very dear friends from there as well. Not one has anything good to say about it. There's a Simpsons episode where they go to Canada to get cheap prescription drugs, and the sign at the airport says: "Winnipeg. We were born here, what's your excuse?" My wife spent ten minutes vehemently agreeing with that when she saw it. Every country has that one place you can safely make fun of if you're anywhere else in it; in Canada that's Winnipeg. Stayed there once overnight on a layover coming back from Toronto. It's the only time I ever stayed at hotel and asked for a room without a view.
 

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