OT: Humor thread
- Thread starter Jets 31
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We truly need Ozzy man to do the commentary for a Jets game. 
We truly need Ozzy man to do the commentary for a Jets game.
Would be the best commentary in hockey history
ryerockarola
Registered User
- Nov 20, 2011
- 6,000
- 7,586
The Top Country Songs of 2020:
12. If The Phone Don’t Ring, You’ll Know It’s Me.
11. It’s Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chewed My Ass All Day.
10. I Hate Every Bone In Her Body But Mine.
9. I Liked You Better Before I Got To Know You So Well.
8. I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim’s Getting’ Better.
7. I Wouldn’t Take Her To A Dog Fight ‘Cause I’m Afraid She’d Win.
6. I’ll Marry You Tomorrow, But Let’s Honeymoon Tonight.
5. I’m So Miserable Without You, It’s Like You’re Still Here.
4. If I Had Shot You When I First Wanted To, I’d Be Out Of Prison By Now.
3. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Sure Do Miss Him.
2. She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger.
And the Number 1 Country Song is:
1. I Ain’t Never Gone To Bed With Ugly Women, But I’ve Sure Woke Up With A Few.
12. If The Phone Don’t Ring, You’ll Know It’s Me.
11. It’s Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chewed My Ass All Day.
10. I Hate Every Bone In Her Body But Mine.
9. I Liked You Better Before I Got To Know You So Well.
8. I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim’s Getting’ Better.
7. I Wouldn’t Take Her To A Dog Fight ‘Cause I’m Afraid She’d Win.
6. I’ll Marry You Tomorrow, But Let’s Honeymoon Tonight.
5. I’m So Miserable Without You, It’s Like You’re Still Here.
4. If I Had Shot You When I First Wanted To, I’d Be Out Of Prison By Now.
3. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Sure Do Miss Him.
2. She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger.
And the Number 1 Country Song is:
1. I Ain’t Never Gone To Bed With Ugly Women, But I’ve Sure Woke Up With A Few.
voyageur
Hockey fanatic
- Jul 10, 2011
- 9,467
- 8,157
ryerockarola
Registered User
- Nov 20, 2011
- 6,000
- 7,586
An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.
The bartender asks him, “You know, a pint goes flat after I draw it; it would taste better if you bought one at a time.”
The Irishman replies, “Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in America, and the other in Australia, and I’m here in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we’d drink this way to remember the days when we drank together.”
The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.
The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way: He orders three pints and drinks them in turn.
One day, he comes in and orders two pints. All the other regulars notice and fall silent.
When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, “I don’t want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss.”
The Irishman looks confused for a moment, then a light dawns in his eye and he laughs, “Oh, no” he says, “everyone’s fine. I’ve just quit drinking.”
The bartender asks him, “You know, a pint goes flat after I draw it; it would taste better if you bought one at a time.”
The Irishman replies, “Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in America, and the other in Australia, and I’m here in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we’d drink this way to remember the days when we drank together.”
The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.
The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way: He orders three pints and drinks them in turn.
One day, he comes in and orders two pints. All the other regulars notice and fall silent.
When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, “I don’t want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss.”
The Irishman looks confused for a moment, then a light dawns in his eye and he laughs, “Oh, no” he says, “everyone’s fine. I’ve just quit drinking.”
Isn't that Brother Jake from 92 that did those?
voyageur
Hockey fanatic
- Jul 10, 2011
- 9,467
- 8,157
Yep. Started with Mac Lean and Mac Lean.
Ahh bush parties and pit parties. One thing about pit water it was always very clean. Don't fall asleep in your car either because waking up in the heat with the windows shut is very hot. 
We used to invade golf courses after dark...bring our beer and other party supplies...
...and stay until morning or the cops chased us out... which ever came first
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So your the bastard hacking up our greens with lawn chair marks ect .We used to invade golf courses after dark...bring our beer and other party supplies...
I always wondered what the weird scratch type marks were, now i know. Hey... you gotta sit somewhere...lolSo your the bastard hacking up our greens with lawn chair marks ect .
Time for a classic.
SNL, the comedy soundtrack of my youth & young adulthood. But they had a nice resurgence in the 2000's
No problem and i totally agree about 2020 , you have to laugh or you'll be pissed off or very sad with what's going on this year. This sums up 2020 for me perfectly.
Man was / is this statement true.It’s gonna be sad when hockey starts up again and we all have to go back to infighting and calling each other names.
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