Neither incident was from a decade ago, but culturally there's definitely been a shift since, so that applies for sure.
I'm just going to chalk up your defensiveness to a general sensitivity to how these were handled by your club. Of course it's not the only club, that's actually the point being made. If you've been around recently, and I assume you have given you're regular, you'd have seen I've spilled plenty of ink on the Bissouma parallel. The other two players you mentioned aren't really relevant, since the topic really has nothing to do with the players but instead how clubs handle these cases. In both of the other cases, the players were exiled/suspended immediately (pretty sure that's the case with Mendy, definitely the case with Sigurdsson).
Your justifications are very odd to me. Like what does Firmino living in a hotel and never getting a red card possibly have to do with drunk driving? And in Flanagan's case, they stood by him until they didn't. Like I said, much more severe case and he was in training that week.
The point, or really observation more than anything, I'm making is pretty simple - I've been surprised at two things: the degree to which John Q. Internet is surprised/shocked that Zouma hasn't been dropped, especially as there are recent real-world examples that reinforce this (see: Liverpool, Yves Bissouma). And as an extension of that, many of these incidents have been on the much more severe end of the spectrum (see: Flanagan, Firmino, Bissouma).
Note on that last sentence, because I know this board can get very touchy about value judgments, that's not a minimization of the psychopathic nature of the Zouma case. But I think objective reason would say violence against women and drunk driving are worse criminal acts. I guess I personally have been surprised at the degree to which animals are a third-rail issue.
As a general comment, I assume it's a UK law or maybe collective bargaining issue as to why the PL itself can't impose a sanction? In the NHL obviously, it was the league imposing a suspension on Evander Kane for example. I think the decision should just be taken out of the club's hands entirely. Let the league make its assessment, especially in a case like this where there's video and it can't get bogged down in due process arguments.