BoldNewLettuce
Esquire
(0-3-1) --vs-- (2-0-0)
[FIELDSET="Once upon a time in the wild wild west"]
Once upon a time in the wild, wild west an ambitious young hockey coach, Dallas Eakins, attended an NFL teams training camp to prepare for the most important season of his young career....meanwhile....fans in Edmonton waited patiently for the National Hockey League season to begin.
Upon hearing the news, a reporter out of Edmonton asked Oilers' General Manager Craig MacTavish and Team President Kevin Lowe what they "thought" of Eakins' self-improvement. They both chuckled slightly and agreed that "it doesn't matter". When the reporter followed up this response with the question; "It doesn't matter what you think? or it doesn't matter what Eakins' does?" the two turned and stared at each-other for several long and awkward minutes. Perhaps they were in a staring contest....or perhaps both were simultaneously locked in some sort of logical paradox.
...
Only days later and Eakins was found bags-packed, showered, and prepared to embark on his journey. He stared into the mirror, feathering his hands through his luxuriant quaff, admiring it, reveling in it, missing his flight, calling the airline agent to reschedule and quickly hanging up on the young Oilers fan. It was time. He gathered his things and made his way out of his small one bedroom basement apartment. "To Texas" Dallas thought "To Destiny".
...
The stars were aligning for Dallas, as he found no traffic, and no lineups at the check-in, and although there was a heated argument with an airport security official over the confiscation of a small smoothie-blender, Dallas Eakins found an astute compromise by using his shoe to crush an apple inside a small plastic bag. Slipping the resourcefully bagged smoothie into his coat pocket, and with a spring in his step, Dallas continued on toward his departure gate and a promising future of coaching excellence.
The flight itself was "smooth sailing" even if several passengers silently endured the question "how many bike rides do you think it takes to get to Texas from here?" followed by "I betcha it'd be a marathon". Still, the plane landed safely in Texas and after an obnoxious shouting match with a local cab driver concerning Pert Plus and whether or not he was in fact an NHL coach, Dallas Eakins arrived at the Cowboys NFL training camp.
...
Several hours of ruthless hazing later, Eakins was ready to begin the first of a series of harrowing and intense physical drills; monkey rolls, bear crawls, and finally the dreaded pit drill. Although not physically built to train with NFL linebackers, and learning very little, Dallas Eakins believed his tutelage under NFL coach Jason Garrett would prove fruitful.
"He was terrible at all of the drills. Every single one of them. Wait, who is he?" said Cowboys' coach Jason Garrett when asked about Eakin's attendance to the NFL camp. Garrett went on to ask "NHL coach? from Canada? Well I'm told he was lucky to only suffer a few mild fractures, so I guess that's something positive, but he's definitely my first cut".
Even though his body was riddled with minor injuries--several fractured ribs, a bruised clavicle, and a series of mild-to-severe sprains and contusions--Dallas Eakins steeled his resolve and remained tied to a stretcher on the sidelines for the remainder of the day. His face, though marked by a flood of tears, was smiling as he studied the field and listened intently to the words of Coach Garrett. The-possibly concussed-wheels were turning and Dallas Eakins now had an intriguing plan.
...
Brimming with renewed confidence and vigor, and upon release from the UT Southwestern Medical Centre, Dallas Eakins was ready to return to the fair city of Edmonton and begin anew.
He turned and remarked to nobody in particular "Well, now I've got a few ideas... a few....FRESH....ideas..HAHAHAHA" as he pulled a plastic bag of crushed apple from his breast pocket.
[/FIELDSET]
[FIELDSET="...Coaching Excellence.."]
[FIELDSET="Oilers Projected Lineup"]
Taylor Hall - Mark Arcobello - Jordan Eberle
Benoit Pouliot - Leon Draisaitl - David Perron
Teddy Purcell - Ryan Nugent Hopkins - Nail Yakupov
Matt Hendricks - Boyd Gordon - Jesse Joennsu
Will Acton
Andrew Ference - Jeff Petry
Nikita Nikitin - Justin Schultz
Martin Marincin - Mark Fayne
Brad Hunt
[/FIELDSET]Benoit Pouliot - Leon Draisaitl - David Perron
Teddy Purcell - Ryan Nugent Hopkins - Nail Yakupov
Matt Hendricks - Boyd Gordon - Jesse Joennsu
Will Acton
Andrew Ference - Jeff Petry
Nikita Nikitin - Justin Schultz
Martin Marincin - Mark Fayne
Brad Hunt
[FIELDSET="Canucks Projected Lineup"]
Daniel Sedin - Henrik Sedin - Radim Vrbata
Chris Higgins - Nick Bonino - Alex Burrows
Brad Richardson - Linden Vey - Zack Kassian
Derek Dorsett - Shawn Matthias - Jannik Hansen
Alex Edler - Chris Tanev
Dan Hamhuis - Luca Sbisa
Ryan Stanton - Kevin Bieksa
Ryan Miller
Eddie Lack
[/FIELDSET]Chris Higgins - Nick Bonino - Alex Burrows
Brad Richardson - Linden Vey - Zack Kassian
Derek Dorsett - Shawn Matthias - Jannik Hansen
Alex Edler - Chris Tanev
Dan Hamhuis - Luca Sbisa
Ryan Stanton - Kevin Bieksa
Ryan Miller
Eddie Lack
[FIELDSET="Vladdy Hockey Stream"]Moncton Radio
QMJHL streaming
[/FIELDSET]
[FIELDSET="Roman Horak update"]
-had a goal and an assist today to help beat Metallurg NK 5-2 with HC Vityaz in the KHL.
[/FIELDSET]
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