Confirmed with Link: This is a bad hockey team (22-23 edition)
- Thread starter Machinehead
- Start date
According to Swedish mathematician and hockey enthusiast, Professor Hack N. Lubie’s “Knotetall System “:
In our defensive zone or farfanghroeler is a 63.7%(not good) and our corsiworsi is a measly 27.3% ( that’s worse)
In the offensive attacking zone our rat-a-tat-tat % is 9 (heaven help us) but our power push tusch is a >10 . That’s ranked 32nd in the league behind everyone! (saints preserve)
To put this in perspective…well it just ain’t good that’s all.
In our defensive zone or farfanghroeler is a 63.7%(not good) and our corsiworsi is a measly 27.3% ( that’s worse)
In the offensive attacking zone our rat-a-tat-tat % is 9 (heaven help us) but our power push tusch is a >10 . That’s ranked 32nd in the league behind everyone! (saints preserve)
To put this in perspective…well it just ain’t good that’s all.
- Sep 1, 2010
- 9,802
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10th overall here this morning
theathletic.com
NHL Power Rankings: The Rangers and Penguins make moves and a haiku for every team
It's become a yearly tradition: The all-haiku power rankings. Every team gets one — even the terrible ones.
theathletic.com
McRanger92
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- Jun 7, 2017
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ESPN had us 8 and Seattle 9 in the power rankings lol. They don’t know puck. These western conference teams suck. Eastern Conference winner is getting Lord Stanley
Riche16
McCready guitar god
They might know (probably do) but they're towing the line to make it "seem" in the realm
No one is going to tell viewers that whoever wins the east is your cup champ
NHL, sponsors etc wouldn't like that at all
Captain Lindy
Formerly known as Kreider Beast
The imbalance between conferences actually favors the west for the Stanley Cup Finals though. East will beat the hell out of each other and be spent by the time the final rolls around, while the western team will have a relatively easy path to get there. That's what happened last year to Tampa.
I'm not paying to read that. f*** the Athletic.10th overall here this morning
NHL Power Rankings: The Rangers and Penguins make moves and a haiku for every team
It's become a yearly tradition: The all-haiku power rankings. Every team gets one — even the terrible ones.
Amazing Kreiderman
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- Apr 11, 2011
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McRanger92
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- Jun 7, 2017
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Amazing Kreiderman
Registered User
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And we looked like shit in October when we lost 4 in a row.
McRanger92
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Amazing Kreiderman
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5th out of 16 isn't middle of the pack. But if you base your opinion on their last 2 games, I understand why you think they're not a good team.
Megustaelhockey
"I like hockey" in Spanish
- Apr 29, 2011
- 21,297
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KirkAlbuquerque
#WeNeverGetAGoodCoach
For real. I’ve said it even since last season, this team is so much less than the sum of its parts with this moron coaching them
There are several things that need to be addressed, but if Shesterkin doesn't get it together it's probably all for naught anyway.
UnSandvich
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- Sep 7, 2017
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With the way this team is playing, we're getting swept in the 1st round no matter who we face. This team f***ing sucks right now.
BobMarleyNYR
Rangers future on D
Thoughts on tonight’s game
Not sure what Joe and Sam were watching, they both seem really inspired beating one of the worst teams in the league. Them winning is the only redeemable quality about tonight’s game, most of which was played in our zone. They rave about our defense--you don’t give up short -handed goals and pretend you’re going to win the Stanley Cup a couple months. Good teams don’t string together ass performances to teams that are pretty bad… If you do that typically, that literally means you are worse pretty bad teams… This team does it typically…
There are a bunch of unimpassioned bitches bitches… And it really does seem like Kane is learning the way>…
Mika isn’t bad, he’s Zibanejanebad…
I loved when Vesey reacted to not scoring on a rush in the third… “I can’t believe that didn’t go in, I shot it like directly into his diaphragm, was the f***?
The little campaign promoting Michelle Gingras is weird probably the result of of one Cablevision’s higher-ups fulfilling a contractual agreement.
Cablevision determine when We Found a Way to Win.
Not sure what Joe and Sam were watching, they both seem really inspired beating one of the worst teams in the league. Them winning is the only redeemable quality about tonight’s game, most of which was played in our zone. They rave about our defense--you don’t give up short -handed goals and pretend you’re going to win the Stanley Cup a couple months. Good teams don’t string together ass performances to teams that are pretty bad… If you do that typically, that literally means you are worse pretty bad teams… This team does it typically…
There are a bunch of unimpassioned bitches bitches… And it really does seem like Kane is learning the way>…
Mika isn’t bad, he’s Zibanejanebad…
I loved when Vesey reacted to not scoring on a rush in the third… “I can’t believe that didn’t go in, I shot it like directly into his diaphragm, was the f***?
The little campaign promoting Michelle Gingras is weird probably the result of of one Cablevision’s higher-ups fulfilling a contractual agreement.
Cablevision determine when We Found a Way to Win.
TopShelfSnipes
Registered User
My biggest issue with their overall play is how it looks as though the system sucks, especially, as I've said before in breakouts and transitions.
I just don't understand how players' puck skills seem to deteriorate so fast, how breakouts and transition become so forced and tedious, and how they seem to never attack the opposing blue line with speed and back in defenders. Could the D be better at outlet passing? Of course. But I just have a very hard time believing that the entire forward group all somehow end up looking lethargic and slow, always allow the D to set up at the blueline, while being prone to neutral zone giveaways, and all of that falls on anything other than the system.
The irony is that when they have a decent period with slightly fewer turnovers but still play the same way when players talk about "playing fast." I really don't see it. It's like Gretzky challenging McDavid about his speed in that stupid sports betting commercial where they race zambonis, and all I can remember in my head is how labored Wayne's skating was in the last Oilers alumni game.
The system needs to adapt to play a little faster. With their talent, I really think they have to open it up and try and win more high scoring games. If they try to defend their way to the Cup, I just don't see how that gets them through the gauntlet that is the East in one piece, let alone not going way too many games against mediocre teams.
Montreal was their first game in 4 days. The legs should have been fresh, they should've been rested, and instead they went out and gave up a sloppy goal in the first minute. Yes, they got a win, which is always good, but these are not the kind of games that should be close. This is how you end up going 7 games against teams you should destroy / dispatch easily, and end up gassed in the ECF. That's a formula for some exciting times in the playoffs, but if your ultimate goal is a Cup, you have to dominate the weaker teams. This is a top 4 in the league team by talent. They need to start playing a system that exploits their strengths rather than one that attempts to cover for their weaknesses.
EdJovanovski
#RempeForCalder
SeanAveryTheGreatOne
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Megustaelhockey
"I like hockey" in Spanish
- Apr 29, 2011
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BLOCKERSAVE
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- Jan 16, 2013
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I agree, seldom they win loose pucks, board battles, front net position, always waiting for the puck come to them, waiting for the other player to get the puck. so frustrating
Yup. Unless something changes drastically there is nowhere near enough "want" here needed to win 16 playoff games, let alone half that
Trouba is literally the only vet right now that's playing according to how a player should be playing given this teams predicament. It's f***ing disappointing but sadly not unexpected from this group
Trouba is literally the only vet right now that's playing according to how a player should be playing given this teams predicament. It's f***ing disappointing but sadly not unexpected from this group
