Don't get too excited over the 3 star selections. From what we can tell, the person picking the 3 stars is about as clueless as they come. Mark Caz used to do the selections, and while no one has officially announced who is making the selections, we believe it to be Andy Zilch our clueless play by play announcer whom replaced Caz as director of communications.
Can't agree more on Zilch's clueless endeavors. He's supposed to be a play by play broadcaster first of all things.
I have heard endless information about the opposing team's coaches, management, ownership, connections to hockey past, and their players: pasts, career highs and lows, statistics, family and personal life, difficulties overcome, and aspirations. Add to that prattling on about their building, the seating capacity and how it relates to the Aud, the scoreboard, his positioning and how it relates to other buildings and how it effects his ability to see the ice, on and off ice mike positions, the stats sheets or lack thereof, the PA system or the PA announcer, the horn, the lack of crowd involvement, the mascot, the food, the goings on in the crowd, the intermission entertainment, the big screen displays during game interludes, etc.
I don't give two flying ***** about any of that crap when the play on the ice is being ignored while he goes into all of this other stuff. That's stuff you "enlighten" the listeners with during lulls in the game and between periods. I have heard the identification of the opposing players lined up for faceoffs, changes made on the fly, and the actual movement of the puck from player to player and attempts to retrieve it and who makes specific efforts to defend against the Comets efforts. Every player by name.
You may ask, "What's so bad about that?"
I would answer, "Absolutely, nothing! That's called play by play."
'Then what's your problem?"
"He
DOESN"T do that for the
COMETS!!!!!!!!!
All I want for him is that he be the listeners eyes. We don't see what he does and a good play by play announcer enables you to envision the actual goings on. To do that he has to tell you who the players are before a whistle and identify the new guys immediately on the changes. Then he has to tell you who does what. Not:
"Shot. SAVE! Rebound. Wide!
BUT:
"Archi shoots. SAVE! Rebound? WIDE! by D'Aoust. He had an open side."
How about:
Faceoff to the left of Ullmark. Porter to take the draw for the Amerks. Chaput wins the draw out to the point. Comets can't keep it in. Stolen back by the Comets and they break back in on the left side. Dumped into the corner and a battle for the puck takes place. It squirts out and a shot goes wide back out to the right point Subban keeps it in. Moves down the boards. Stops. Steps inside and shoots and Ullmark gloves it down for a whistle.
vs.
Faceoff to the left of Ullmark. Chaput's line on for the Comets (he told us who was on Chaput's line earlier and it's our job to remember that if he doesn't have time to say "with Goldobin on the left and Boucher on the right with McEneny and Subban.Or at least mention a change on that line if has occurred. (Chaput's line out with Rodin now on the right side.)
(There is really no excuse to not have the time when he watches the line changes leave the bench after the whistle. I don't need to know how many saves Ullmark made last night in Providence instead!)
Porter to take the draw for the Amerks. Chaput wins the draw back towards Subban but Smith challenges him for the slow moving puck and is able to knock it out of the zone and blows by Subbie and picks it up. OHH, Boucher strips it from Smith on the back check. What hustle. He turns back to the left and hits the exiting Chaput in the middle who dumps it right back into the left corner. Goldobin in hot pursuit and a battle ensues in the corner between Goldy and Redmond. McEneny pinches down and Chaput now joins the battle and the puck squirts out. McEneny pounces and shoots! Wide! The puck goes up the right side boards and Subban keeps it in. He moves down the boards, reverses direction, slips inside and lets it go. Ullmark gloves the miscued shot and holds on for a whistle.
That's the difference in being the eyes for the listener instead of giving a half-***** version of what's going on.
Here's another one.
Puck goes down the ice and the Comets change up. There is a commotion going on in the crowd down to my right. I can't, I can't really identify what exactly is happening.
(The game is happening !!!!! How about you tell us what exactly is happening on the ice.)
There is a guy dressed in monkey suit.
(Do you know it's a guy?)
I can't see what it is he's doing that has the crowd all riled up.
(Do you think we care?????? CALL the GAME!!!!!)
He's tossing out peanuts but the bag has a string attached and he pulls it back.
SCORE!!!!!!!!! Carter Bancks on the breakaway and it's 1-0 Comets!
ARE YOU ******* ME?
Instead of Sifers flips it off the glass and out of danger. The puck goes down the ice, but won't be far enough for icing and the Comets can get a much needed change. Bancks, Goldobin, and Boucher stream out over the boards along with Chatfield and Sautner. Her come the Amerks right back up the ice.
Criscuolo carries it across the line. Drops it back to Guhle who hits Smith at the top of the left circle. Holm forces him wide and to the corner. Puck goes back up the boards and out to Percy at the point. he winds and shoots. It's blocked by Bancks and out to the neutral zone and Carter is in pursuit. He scoops it up and he's gone.
It's Carter Bancks on the breakaway. He moves in on Ullmark. Fakes. Fakes again and SCORES!!!!!!!!! Top shelf , blocker side. Amazing goal for Bancks who is not known for his puck prowess has the Comets up 1-0!
Read and learn Andy. That's what the guys who broadcast big time sound like. That's how your predecessor earned his gig in Brooklyn with the Islanders.