OT: The Plausible Keats thread
- Thread starter dalem177
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"Smokey Robinson is often called 'the King of Motown', and unfortunately you may remember that the LA Kings smoked our Red Wings in their two-game series last season. Well, fortunes have improved for the Wings since last season enough that even though they'll be missing 2 of their top 6 forwards tonight, they shouldn't need to call on Smokey and his Miracles for help." - Plausible Keats
"Ferris Bueller, in a movie we all loved from the eighties, famously claimed to be Abe Froman, the Sausage King of Chicago. Now, for the Red Wings tonight, the lines are going to be something of a sausage themselves due to some missing players. Here's to hoping that, just this once, we won't mind watching this particular sausage being made right in front of us." - Plausible Keats
"When George Bird Grinnell created the first Audubon Society way back in 1886, there was as yet no National Hockey League, but he probably would have been pleased to know that over 130 years later we have no less than three teams representing our fine feathered friends. Two of those teams will meet today and try to not repeat their last results, seeing as the Ducks and the Wings each suffered an overtime loss in their last games, confirming that they are indeed 'birds of a feather'." - Plausible Keats
"Folks it's said that 'the devil is in the details', and 'better the devil you know'. Well, right now the Devils are in Detroit, and the Red Wings know that these Devils will be trying to change one of the details of their last game from a loss to a win, but the Wings are hoping that they can leave them in their proverbial dust tonight." - Plausible Keats
"In this first month of an 82 game season, the Bruins haven't lost a game yet and Brad Marchand hasn't licked anyone yet either. Coming off of an embarrassing performance last game, the Detroit Red Wings are probably glad that only the first of those streaks is on the table for expiration in tonight's game." - Plausible Keats
"Well it's unseasonably warm back in Minnesota, where tonight's opponents hail from, tonight. What's not unseasonable is the giant milk carton outside of Little Caesar's Arena. As has been sadly typical the last few seasons, just a few games into the season and the side of that milk carton has the title 'Have You Seen Me?' and then lists most of the forwards on the roster. Here's hoping that all the milk of tonight's game doesn't go sour on us folks." - Plausible Keats
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"In 1877 hunters could sell a buffalo tongue for 25 cents and it was worth twice that on a plate in a New York restaurant. As your Red Wings hit the ice tonight in Buffalo in 2022, they might be thinking that they want to avoid ending their 1 game win streak twice as hard as a certain little boy should have avoided sticking his tongue to a frozen pole." - Plausible Keats
"It's about 520 land miles between the cities of Detroit, Michigan and Washington DC, and it feels like the Red Wings were in the box for about 520 minutes in their last two blowout losses. Which of course they weren't. In lieu of that kind of "No"mentum tonight though, the team will be looking to instead have 60 full minutes of solid play." - Plausible Keats
"Folks, we may remember that, on the Island of Misfit Toys, one of the main inhabitants was a Charlie in the Box. Well, coach LaLonde has been mostly happy with his team's five on five play so far, so if his Red Wings can stay out of the box today against these visiting Islanders, they have a good chance of not joining that group of misfits on their island. Here's to hoping we get so say "Sorry, Charlie."" - Plausible Keats
"Rocky Jones, Space Ranger, used to roam the Solar system with his sidekick Winky on a quest to root out badly-costumed space villains who always seemed to lose in the final reel. The Rangers the Red Wings have rocketed out to New York to tangle with today may not have ray guns in their inventory, but if Detroit shows up to this second game of a back-to-back not firing on all jets, then we may end up calling to say "Houston, we have a problem."" - Plausible Keats
"Montreal is the home city for the famous Cirque du Soleil, but instead of seeing amazing and complex trapeze feats from the visitors' team tonight, the depleted-but-still-game Red Wings hope to show the crowd some very basic "trap" hockey of their own, and that should keep the game from devolving into its own kind of circus." - Plausible Keats
"Back in 1760, during their 'Late Unpleasantness", Fort Detroit was turned over by the French to the British Army's Rogers Rangers. Tonight we will see more Rangers in Detroit, but this time they are hopefully bringing just sticks, and not muskets and powder and goals." - Plausible Keats
"Detroit and Anaheim are both looking to snap 3 game losing streaks tonight. Now, according to the old Schoolhouse Rock cartoons, three is a magic number, and the number four was about a four-legged zoo. The happy outcome of tonight's game would be for the Ducks to be languishing in that number four zoo and the Wings flying free after a win, but that presumes that our Detroit Red Wings don't skip the second period again like they were back in the schoolhouse." - Plausible Keats
"It looks like Wyatt Newpower, now a 24-year-old signed prospect in Grand Rapids, will be only the 4th Red Wing to ever wear the number 47 on his jersey. Well, 47 years ago the movie Jaws was released and created a new summer past time - the blockbuster. The Wings had probably wanted to come into the SAP Center tonight thinking they were Quint in the third act with his harpoon gun with the heroic music playing, but after the last few third periods they might be feeling more like Hooper in his cage in the water. Here's hoping that Detroit can make sure it's San Jose's block that ends up busted."
- Plausible Keats
- Plausible Keats
"Sometimes when you're making spaghetti sauce you need to remember to not spill paprika on your socks. Now the words "predator" and "paprika" both start with "p", and tonight after a dramatic road trip the Detroit Red Wings are looking to not emulate their old zamboni driver, and to not spill any of their "p" on their own socks, or indeed anywhere else." - Plausible Keats
"Yesterday was Turkey Day here in the United States as we celebrated our day of Thanksgiving, and if you look at a map, the country of Turkey and the state of Arizona share, roughly, the same latitude. As we shake off our various meals of gobbler meat, stuffing, and pumpkin pie, we can only hope that the Arizona Coyotes give our Red Wings some latitude, and don't manage to turn tonight's game into a game of Turkish Delight." - Plausible Keats
"When you think of the Maple Leafs, you way also think of maple syrup, most famously associated here in the U.S. with the state of Vermont. But there's another place famous for tapping trees for the sugary goodness, and that place is a tiny town called Vermontville, right here in Michigan. Last season's Maple Syrup Festival in that smallest of towns was just 2 days past when Detroit was getting blanked at Toronto three to nothing. For tonight's game the Wings hope they will be stacking "goals for" like pancakes on a plate during the first period and not looking like they are skating ankle-deep in syrup." - Plausible Keats
SoupNazi
Serenity now. Insanity later.
- Feb 6, 2010
- 26,425
- 14,597
Collecting these in one place, slowly.
Lil Sebastian Cossa
Opinions are share are my own personal opinions.
- Jul 6, 2012
- 11,436
- 7,446
This may well be the best thread on this board
Aww shucks.
You want me to post them only here? GDT and I copy them here?
SoupNazi
Serenity now. Insanity later.
- Feb 6, 2010
- 26,425
- 14,597
No, post them in the GDT and we can copy them here. I copied them from the previous GDTs but since GDTs generally don't get seen again after the game, it would be a shame to lose them.
21 games so far. I count 15 above. I know I missed one. Looking for 5 more...
GDT: - Game 1: Montreal Canadiens @ Detroit Red Wings | 10/14/2022 | 7 PM ET
Elmer 2nd PP unit (over Ras) whoa Tough to see past a tree. Nearly impossible to see past a skyscraper.
GDT: - Game 2: Detroit Red Wings @ New Jersey Devils | 10/15/2022 | 7 PM ET
"Today is National Cheese Curd Day. So as Detroit is coming off a GRATE effort against Montreal, they can prove their start was not too GOUDA to be true by replicating that effort against the Devils. This might even be the jumpstart they need to show they once again BRIE-long in the mix for a...
GDT: - Game 3: Detroit Red Wings vs. kings | 10/17/2022 | 7 PM ET (BSD)
I'm of the opinion that losing Bertuzzi isn't as big to this team as some here might think, but losing Vrana AND Bertuzzi makes me a little worried. Any idea what is happening with Vrana? "personal reasons"...
Did I miss 2 more...?
Nov 3:
GDT: - Game 10: Nov. 3 - Detroit RedWings Vs. Washington Capitals *The Streak Continues*
Sees Game Day Thread Me: "Nice, a game today" Me 2 mins later: Frk It is a knitter!
Nov 15:
GDT: - Game 16: Detroit Red Wings @ ducks | 11/15/2022 | 10:00 PM ET (BSD)
6-4 Wings win Help my heart and score a goal Seider. I'd be alright with just a good defensive game out of him and Chiarot..
There. I think that's all the threads. And thanks for going the extra mile for my silliness.
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