Staal IS NOT a lot better than Girardi and is one of the worst defensemen in the league. The skates like he's stuck in quicksand, makes terrible decisions with the puck and misses his assignments more than most normal people change their underwear.
This is your biggest mistake. You overrate Staal and then try to pawn him off on Colorado with retention? Girardi is definitely bad and is masked by Tampa's offense and puck possession, but Staal is worse at this point and has a dogshit awul contract.
I wouldn't even try to pawn Staal off on anyone, anyone that's seen him play anytime recently would want a 1st with him to take that terrible deal on and if they were going to retain half on him, why not just buy him out? It's actually better for the team, being that they would get a very minimal return on him in any trade they make and they wouldn't have to give up an asset to move him.
You just did not think this out at all.