Sour grapes would be blaming the wind for a disappointing game. Or that the other team lost 3 players to injury in one half and had to play an injured one up front, and yet when outplayed, blame those injuries.
Arrogant isn't the word I'd use. He is rather crazy yes, but he won't let the press blame his players for anything and would decide to look like a fool instead. So yes, he is condescending to them. That is part of the environment at the club, he wanted the club to be like a family and he has standards they have to uphold. On one of his first days he said he thought the atmosphere at the club wasn't particularly good and that it was foreign to what he was used to. So he was going to make the team learn the names of the people in the cafeteria, the people who do their equipment, everything. Part of their transfer strategy is to find out if players mistreat the staff at their club and if they have this kind of attitude behind closed doors. I don't really find that arrogant at all.
The only other manager he's ever had a problem with was one of the Brexit lovers who sent their team out to kick all our players. We have had some arrogant managers in our past though. Benitez, much as I love him for what he did, was definitely one of them.