Puckatron 3000
Glitchy Prototype
You're thinking too rationally.
The only question is will they resist the public pressure, or will they cave in? Nobody knows for sure
They might give a low-ball offer to Stamkos. I don't think he's a good fit for all the reasons Mort gave, but getting him for free (no assets) has got to be awfully tempting. Maybe (but probably not) even a really low-ball offer, with super short term, to Ladd. Unless either want to leave money (and term, for Ladd) on the table, they look elsewhere.