these might be my favorite posts ever.
Lets honest here, there's a solid list of things that the dead bird would/wouldn't do that would be an improvement over MacDonald.
So to start with the ones previously mentioned:
-Dead birds don't back into the zone so fast that it looks like they're trying to win a race to the goalline against the forward
-Dead birds don't stand in the crease, restricting the goalies movement
-Dead birds don't make a tape to tape pass to the opposing forward and then let him go in all alone against the goalie
-Dead birds don't try to skate back and forth behind their own net in an attempt to juke the opponent... and then immediately turn over the puck to that same opponent
-Dead birds don't hold the puck too long in the offensive zone instead of making the smart move and passing it to their insanely talented offensive defensemen partner
-Dead birds don't crosscheck a forward in the back, after the whistle, causing them to fall on top of the dead birds goalie teammate.
-Dead birds don't ALWAYS PLAY THE DAMN SHOT INSTEAD OF TRYING TO PREVENT THE PASS when backing in on a 1v2 rush
-Dead birds don't take up $5,000,000 in cap space
-Dead birds don't unite an entire forum of people in hatred, when normally these people can't unanimously agree on anything.
-And lastly, dead birds don't play so ****ing bad that they make people wish they were replaced with a dead animal, only semi-jokingly.
And in an effort to be fair, MacDonald is better than the dead bird when it comes to:
-skating
-harder shot