The Oilers are cursed.
Gamesmanship, sportsmanship... These seem words to some, yet they are much more profound.
Other wordly effort, the holy dangles, competitive heart and the zeal to achieve great things. The players do not "create" this - they are merely conduits for the spirits of the Great Game of Hockey.
We have offended these spirits, and we will repent for years to come.
The Gods frown upon us and we are miserable; here are our sins.
1) We have tanked. We called it a rebuild to fool the Gods, but the Gods are not fooled. Spilling our own blood for success is dark, blood magic.
2) We heard the voice of the prophet, then replaced him with the devil. Firing Ralph, a respected international coach who preached the gospel of positive energy and work ethic, managed to take a beyond brutal roster to the closest we have been to playoffs for many, many moons. His work with the Swiss team was remarkable, as was his work with our disaster of a group. Firing this spirited, positive, successful man over Skype is an affront that we will not be forgiven.
3) The cronies. Six Rings. Arrogance, Ego, Ignorance. Lowe point. It is easy to feel like Mugatu - crazy pills. The Oiler organization, and those involved, were blessed with the coming of the Son of Hockey himself. The Great One brought this franchise into the promise land. A community priding itself on work ethic, spirit, and love of the game were rewarded with Gretzky, the ultimate hockey talent. Those in his party reaped the successes that followed him, then had the gull to become false prophets. Taking credit and resplendence for the talents of others, claiming the knowledge of the Rings, when they were merely pawns in a bigger game. The false prophets are unintelligent charlatans. Knowing a-lil'-thing-'er-two'bout-winnin' in the 80s and 90s has nothing to do with winning post lock-out. Nuge is not Gretzky. Hall is not Messier. Schultz is not Coffey.
4) Honour and Pride. We have lost this along the way. We are soft, we do not compete, we allow others to bring harm to our players... We are not willing to sacrifice our health to form team unity, to intimidate others. The spirits revile weakness, and we exude nothing but.
5) Our team is a business. Bob Nicholson dares build "the disney land of hockey" around this false empire. Our mission is money, and the spirits will punish us for this.
This, sweet friends, is why we will suffer for many more years.
We will bleed.
We have disgraced the Spirit of the Game.