Official Fire Chuck Fletcher Thread

[Starat327]

Chuck used his first wish to set the genie free.

 

[DancingPanther]

If you look in the mirror and say “Chuck” 3 times, half of your valuables disappear.

And you pay a tax

 

[wankstifier]

Chuck Fletcher pretends to have back problems so people feel obligated to help him tie his shoes. The truth is Chuck can never get the hang of how the laces are supposed to go together.

 

[Tripod]

Chuck finds Jell-O too crunchy

 

[MayonnaiseOreo]

Chuck only drinks orange juice after he's brushed his teeth.

 

[Hanover Fist]

Chuck wipes his ass before he takes a shit.
Chuck also invented the basketball glove

 

[Don Nachbaur 26]

ASF:

"
No management team has ever failed so spectacularly in my lifetime as these Flyers – and there were a lot of bad Phillies teams, the Process-era Sixers and the sugar rush that was Chip Kelly.

But this is the worst of the worst of the worst.

Go. All of them. Nice people. Good people. But either very bad at their jobs or too closely associated with those that are.

End the disgrace. Give the city back their hockey team. NOW. I’ll hold the fiddle for you.
"

The Time has Come to End the Embarrassment that is Flyers Management

There is a legend that the Roman emperor Nero sat on his throne and played the fiddle while the great fire of Rome burned beneath him. Turns out the legend isn’t true. He wasn’t fiddling. Instead, he dressed up in an actor’s stage costume and sang a song as his empire crumbled beneath him. The […]

www.crossingbroad.com

Holy shit, I love it. You're turn Charlie.

This would be Meltzer's response.

 

[Audible Velvet]

When Chuck turned 18, they let him leave the house without wearing his helmet.

 

[Embiid]

Chuck asked his doctor about Paxil...

 

[MayonnaiseOreo]

Chuck shows up to random schools across Philadelphia to ask the teachers if they're still collecting homework during the middle of class.

 

[TheGreenTBer]

Chuck has a pet rock named "Kevin" that he reads to every night.

Chuck says "bless you" when he blows his nose.

 

[Hextallent63]

Chuck eats cereal with a fork.

 

[Tripod]

Chuck stares at his orange juice because the box says concentrate

 

[mja]

Chuck used his first wish to set the genie free.

He tried to give the genie lamp away after that, but had to add a 2nd round pick before he could find any takers.

 

[MayonnaiseOreo]

Chuck eats popsicles while making full eye contact with anybody he's around.

 

[TheGreenTBer]

Chuck stares at his orange juice because the box says concentrate

i nearly pooped

 

[Tripod]

Chuck orders his sushi well done

 

[Embiid]

Chuck giggles uncontrollably when he is in the condom and sex products aisle of the drug store..

 

[TheGreenTBer]

Chuck giggles uncontrollably when he is in the condom and sex products aisle of the drug store..

wait you're NOT supposed to do that?

 

[Beef Invictus]

Chuck listens to Prairie Home Companion

 

[MayonnaiseOreo]

Chuck's favorite Beatle is Ringo.

 

[Tripod]

Chuck thinks Moby Dick is an STD.

 

[Audible Velvet]

At 15, he finally stopped yelling “mom, I’m done!” through the bathroom door

 

[MayonnaiseOreo]

Chuck passes notes to the other GMs on draft day that say, "Do you like me? Circle YES / NO"

 

[Starat327]

Chuck thinks draft day is a bar which is why he gives away all his picks.