The Laziest Player In The League...

[I am Bettman]

Can’t even say that Ovi works hard in any zone nowadays. He just floats around ineffectively.

 

[BraveCanadian]

Willy Nylander has to be up there

 

[Eco]

Based on this year alone:

If it's the All Star Game, then it's Kuch.

If it's the regular season, then it's PLD

If it's the playoffs, then it's Ovi.

 

[Spargon]

I saw enough moments of legitimately good play to believe the other 90% of the time pure laziness.

Guy would make a pass in the neutral zone and then just stand still watching it. Repeatedly. Shift after shift.

Some Leaf fans were staunch supporters of his. Even wanted him drafted over Nylander and were pissed when he wasn't. Then he gets here and was just a waste of a roster spot.

 

[Preposterone]

Not every Bruins fan will agree with me on this but many will.

Nick Ritchie.

This is going to sound like sour grapes from a Boston fan but I don't give a shit.

Ritchie is one of the worst players I've seen in a Bruins sweater in a long time. He routinely made me question what it meant to be a Boston fan, he tested my patience and my ability to root for my boys on a routine basis.

I can excuse a lot, that's what sports fandom is, right? It's a place to be biased and petty and stupid in a safe little sandbox of biased petty stupidity. But suck me sideways Thick Dick Nick made it a chore. I can handle guys lacking talent but playing with heart, I can handle a lack of heart in crazy talented guys, I can handle the staggering room temperature milk mediocrity of guys like Lee Stempniak, but Thick Dick Nick is none of those things.

He plays the game like someone trying to egg you on into taking a swing at him. He skates with the urgency of an old lady shopping for canned beats, but with half the speed. His hockey IQ is on par with Brett Favre's. I'm assuming Brett Farve has never played hockey, correct me if I'm wrong. Nick constantly skates around like he's surprised he's at an NHL game and then glides back to the bench (probably from the penalty box for a stick infraction) with the dim look of Lenny from Of Mice and Men. Then he sits there like a melting chocolate Santa, with his hair inexplicably sticking up through the vent in his helmet, waiting to be surprised by his next turn to get on the ice.

Consider this: He scored 15 goals last year, found some dangerous ice as a PP scorer, and Bruins fans were debating if he would be a good 4th liner or not this year, because our 4th line was that f***ing bad, and Ritchie was the only skater who could conceivably make it worse. He scored 15 goals for us and we weren't sure if he would be a good replacement for Chris f***ing Wagner, the surly hobbit of the TD garden.

Nick Ritchie is a bigger contributor to the decline in cardiovascular health in Boston fans than smoking and obesity. He's the equivalent of a double bacon cheeseburger on your system. He is hockey diarrhea. The guy takes the stupidest retaliatory penalties you've ever seen. He is complete invisible until you need a momentum swing, goes "Got ya boss" and cross checks someone in the neck and bumbles off the ice like Abbott and/or Costello while simultaneously shrugging and bitching to the refs and the guy he blindsided.

I'm sure he's not a bad guy IRL, I don't mean for this to be a character assassination. I'm sure he has family and besides Brett they probably don't suck. This isn't about kicking a player on their way out; let the record reflect that every Boston fan has a few memories of cursing his name and that we started kicking him long before he was down. (See also the general well wishes for Kuraly upon his departure.)

Nick isn't a goon, he's a bad boyfriend. He'll score a couple of goals one week and you'll think he's turned a corner and then he'll hit on one of your friends and tell you to chill out because he's just being friendly. Don't buy the hype, be f***ing aware.

I am ecstatic that Ritchie wasn't held onto as a sunk cost, and that Toronto signed him. There you go, that's your analysis.

 

[AhosDatsyukian]

Not in the same way as this thread is referring to but Teuvo Teravainen is notably pretty lazy and has to be pushed really hard to practice, lift, etc. by Rod. Not lazy on the ice in games though. Honestly think if he had an elite work ethic like a MacKinnon he could be a superstar.

 

[yeaher]

well...ryan johansen. havent see it but maybe torts got some inside info..

People underestimate how dangerous the Avs are considering he was our second line centre for a majority of the season

 

[KingsHockey24]

Dubois.

Next question.

 

[Jannik Hansen]

This is going to sound like sour grapes from a Boston fan but I don't give a shit.

Ritchie is one of the worst players I've seen in a Bruins sweater in a long time. He routinely made me question what it meant to be a Boston fan, he tested my patience and my ability to root for my boys on a routine basis.

I can excuse a lot, that's what sports fandom is, right? It's a place to be biased and petty and stupid in a safe little sandbox of biased petty stupidity. But suck me sideways Thick Dick Nick made it a chore. I can handle guys lacking talent but playing with heart, I can handle a lack of heart in crazy talented guys, I can handle the staggering room temperature milk mediocrity of guys like Lee Stempniak, but Thick Dick Nick is none of those things.

He plays the game like someone trying to egg you on into taking a swing at him. He skates with the urgency of an old lady shopping for canned beats, but with half the speed. His hockey IQ is on par with Brett Favre's. I'm assuming Brett Farve has never played hockey, correct me if I'm wrong. Nick constantly skates around like he's surprised he's at an NHL game and then glides back to the bench (probably from the penalty box for a stick infraction) with the dim look of Lenny from Of Mice and Men. Then he sits there like a melting chocolate Santa, with his hair inexplicably sticking up through the vent in his helmet, waiting to be surprised by his next turn to get on the ice.

Consider this: He scored 15 goals last year, found some dangerous ice as a PP scorer, and Bruins fans were debating if he would be a good 4th liner or not this year, because our 4th line was that f***ing bad, and Ritchie was the only skater who could conceivably make it worse. He scored 15 goals for us and we weren't sure if he would be a good replacement for Chris f***ing Wagner, the surly hobbit of the TD garden.

Nick Ritchie is a bigger contributor to the decline in cardiovascular health in Boston fans than smoking and obesity. He's the equivalent of a double bacon cheeseburger on your system. He is hockey diarrhea. The guy takes the stupidest retaliatory penalties you've ever seen. He is complete invisible until you need a momentum swing, goes "Got ya boss" and cross checks someone in the neck and bumbles off the ice like Abbott and/or Costello while simultaneously shrugging and bitching to the refs and the guy he blindsided.

I'm sure he's not a bad guy IRL, I don't mean for this to be a character assassination. I'm sure he has family and besides Brett they probably don't suck. This isn't about kicking a player on their way out; let the record reflect that every Boston fan has a few memories of cursing his name and that we started kicking him long before he was down. (See also the general well wishes for Kuraly upon his departure.)

Nick isn't a goon, he's a bad boyfriend. He'll score a couple of goals one week and you'll think he's turned a corner and then he'll hit on one of your friends and tell you to chill out because he's just being friendly. Don't buy the hype, be f***ing aware.

I am ecstatic that Ritchie wasn't held onto as a sunk cost, and that Toronto signed him. There you go, that's your analysis.

 

[Faterson]

The Laziest Player In The League after Dubois...​

Fixed thread title for you. (There can be no possible debate about no. 1, so this thread can only be about the second laziest player in the league.)

 

[KirkAlbuquerque]

Kreider can be very lazy

 

[TheDawnOfANewTage]

I feel like Marner, Gaudreau, and I have about the same dedication to our workout regimes. But ya, PLD is in a class of his own- absolutely called that one, I’m almost impressed how many teams he convinced he’d play harder for.

 

[stempniaksen]

PLD rightfully getting called out but Jeff Skinner is a prime candidate for this.

I’m glad Tyler Arnason is being brought up here. Muckler traded for him at the deadline like he was supposed to be some answer for playoff success and he was so bad he ended up being a healthy scratch.

 

[Mr Positive]

PLD in that Columbus-Tampa series or against Toronto was a sight to behold. I don't know if it is laziness but something is up. It didn't look like his game would depend on youthful energy. Just great two way play. But whatever the reason it comes across as laziness. He could be better.

 

[Planetov]

I don't think Ovechkin is an especially lazy player.

At his peak he played hard. He was always moving and exerting effort. He wasn't great defensively, but I'm not sure that was primarily an effort problem.

He's coasting in that clip, but you can find similar clips of other notable players.

You don't score that many goals and have that many seasons as a noteworthy player if you're lazy.

This post right here is what is wrong with HF boards these days. Rational, reasonable, well-thought-through posts like this are just plain unacceptable. We need more emotionally-charged, knee-jerk, and illogical posts to keep standards where they belong.

 

[norrisnick]

Anthony Mantha can't even try enough to stay in a lineup given his talents and physical attributes...

 

[Hostile Offer]

Jakub Vrana

 

[24 others]

This is going to sound like sour grapes from a Boston fan but I don't give a shit.

Ritchie is one of the worst players I've seen in a Bruins sweater in a long time. He routinely made me question what it meant to be a Boston fan, he tested my patience and my ability to root for my boys on a routine basis.

I can excuse a lot, that's what sports fandom is, right? It's a place to be biased and petty and stupid in a safe little sandbox of biased petty stupidity. But suck me sideways Thick Dick Nick made it a chore. I can handle guys lacking talent but playing with heart, I can handle a lack of heart in crazy talented guys, I can handle the staggering room temperature milk mediocrity of guys like Lee Stempniak, but Thick Dick Nick is none of those things.

He plays the game like someone trying to egg you on into taking a swing at him. He skates with the urgency of an old lady shopping for canned beats, but with half the speed. His hockey IQ is on par with Brett Favre's. I'm assuming Brett Farve has never played hockey, correct me if I'm wrong. Nick constantly skates around like he's surprised he's at an NHL game and then glides back to the bench (probably from the penalty box for a stick infraction) with the dim look of Lenny from Of Mice and Men. Then he sits there like a melting chocolate Santa, with his hair inexplicably sticking up through the vent in his helmet, waiting to be surprised by his next turn to get on the ice.

Consider this: He scored 15 goals last year, found some dangerous ice as a PP scorer, and Bruins fans were debating if he would be a good 4th liner or not this year, because our 4th line was that f***ing bad, and Ritchie was the only skater who could conceivably make it worse. He scored 15 goals for us and we weren't sure if he would be a good replacement for Chris f***ing Wagner, the surly hobbit of the TD garden.

Nick Ritchie is a bigger contributor to the decline in cardiovascular health in Boston fans than smoking and obesity. He's the equivalent of a double bacon cheeseburger on your system. He is hockey diarrhea. The guy takes the stupidest retaliatory penalties you've ever seen. He is complete invisible until you need a momentum swing, goes "Got ya boss" and cross checks someone in the neck and bumbles off the ice like Abbott and/or Costello while simultaneously shrugging and bitching to the refs and the guy he blindsided.

I'm sure he's not a bad guy IRL, I don't mean for this to be a character assassination. I'm sure he has family and besides Brett they probably don't suck. This isn't about kicking a player on their way out; let the record reflect that every Boston fan has a few memories of cursing his name and that we started kicking him long before he was down. (See also the general well wishes for Kuraly upon his departure.)

Nick isn't a goon, he's a bad boyfriend. He'll score a couple of goals one week and you'll think he's turned a corner and then he'll hit on one of your friends and tell you to chill out because he's just being friendly. Don't buy the hype, be f***ing aware.

I am ecstatic that Ritchie wasn't held onto as a sunk cost, and that Toronto signed him. There you go, that's your analysis.

Do we have a HF Hall of Fame for posts like this? We should have one

 

[Duder54]

I always thought it was Leon Draisaitl according to half the posters on HF…

 

[McRegular]

Barkov

 

[Beerz]

Mark Stone.

Can't even be bothered to play the regular season

 

[Zine]

Don't confuse 35+ year olds picking their spots on the ice with laziness. Conservation of energy becomes an issue as you age. One doesn't stay in the league as long as these guys do by floating around doing nothing.

 

[JoVel]

This is going to sound like sour grapes from a Boston fan but I don't give a shit.

Ritchie is one of the worst players I've seen in a Bruins sweater in a long time. He routinely made me question what it meant to be a Boston fan, he tested my patience and my ability to root for my boys on a routine basis.

I can excuse a lot, that's what sports fandom is, right? It's a place to be biased and petty and stupid in a safe little sandbox of biased petty stupidity. But suck me sideways Thick Dick Nick made it a chore. I can handle guys lacking talent but playing with heart, I can handle a lack of heart in crazy talented guys, I can handle the staggering room temperature milk mediocrity of guys like Lee Stempniak, but Thick Dick Nick is none of those things.

He plays the game like someone trying to egg you on into taking a swing at him. He skates with the urgency of an old lady shopping for canned beats, but with half the speed. His hockey IQ is on par with Brett Favre's. I'm assuming Brett Farve has never played hockey, correct me if I'm wrong. Nick constantly skates around like he's surprised he's at an NHL game and then glides back to the bench (probably from the penalty box for a stick infraction) with the dim look of Lenny from Of Mice and Men. Then he sits there like a melting chocolate Santa, with his hair inexplicably sticking up through the vent in his helmet, waiting to be surprised by his next turn to get on the ice.

Consider this: He scored 15 goals last year, found some dangerous ice as a PP scorer, and Bruins fans were debating if he would be a good 4th liner or not this year, because our 4th line was that f***ing bad, and Ritchie was the only skater who could conceivably make it worse. He scored 15 goals for us and we weren't sure if he would be a good replacement for Chris f***ing Wagner, the surly hobbit of the TD garden.

Nick Ritchie is a bigger contributor to the decline in cardiovascular health in Boston fans than smoking and obesity. He's the equivalent of a double bacon cheeseburger on your system. He is hockey diarrhea. The guy takes the stupidest retaliatory penalties you've ever seen. He is complete invisible until you need a momentum swing, goes "Got ya boss" and cross checks someone in the neck and bumbles off the ice like Abbott and/or Costello while simultaneously shrugging and bitching to the refs and the guy he blindsided.

I'm sure he's not a bad guy IRL, I don't mean for this to be a character assassination. I'm sure he has family and besides Brett they probably don't suck. This isn't about kicking a player on their way out; let the record reflect that every Boston fan has a few memories of cursing his name and that we started kicking him long before he was down. (See also the general well wishes for Kuraly upon his departure.)

Nick isn't a goon, he's a bad boyfriend. He'll score a couple of goals one week and you'll think he's turned a corner and then he'll hit on one of your friends and tell you to chill out because he's just being friendly. Don't buy the hype, be f***ing aware.

I am ecstatic that Ritchie wasn't held onto as a sunk cost, and that Toronto signed him. There you go, that's your analysis.

To add to this, when Ritchie couldn't find a job in the NHL anymore, he went to play in Finland. He was so out of shape and just all around a terrible player that he only lasted for 10 games, and then headed to Germany to play for the team that finished second last in the league. He put up a goal and an assist in 8 games.

 

[Arthur Morgan]

Alexei Kovalev? that guy could be the best player in the NHL..... when he wanted to be

 

[Habs Halifax]

Can’t even say that Ovi works hard in any zone nowadays. He just floats around ineffectively.

Fair but man, he scores goals.

Barkov