OT: Thread About Nothing (TaN #...lost count)

My3Sons

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I’ve never been into Schecters but I would love to try out that S-1.

Great show as always last night.
View attachment 821855
@My3Sons how was your show?

It was great. The wife and I have always loved Steely Dan. Not sure why it took us this long to see them (them is a bit euphemistic at this point it’s just Fagan). They sounded great and Fagan has backup singers to help him where needed. He bantered a bit with the crowd and played a great selection of songs. The Eagles really surpsied me. I expected tired old lounge act but they sounded great and gave a good effort. Henley was very into it and several times gave some longish monologues about loving the city and at one point about missing Jimmy Buffet. Joe Walsh was the star. They played three of his non-Eagles tunes and each one rocked. If I have any real criticism it’s that their set is long on really mellow stuff - Seven Bridges Road -Desperado - a number of others in that vein. But Henley Schmidt and Walsh all still sound great even if they cannot sustain the high notes that long. No backup singers for them. And Frey’s son Deacon does a creditable if unspectacular job standing in for his dad. Walsh alone is worth the price of admission.
 

njdevils1982

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My3Sons

Nobody told me there'd be days like these...
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i have the concert for Bangladesh LP... and three or four ravi shankar

If I could trade all my concerts for one it would be to have seen Bangladesh as an adult when I could appreciate it. The acoustic Here Comes the Sun is my entry for top ten moments in live music in thr 20th century. Something from The Last Waltz and probably Comfortably Numb from the original Wall Shows and Jimi Hendrix at Monterey or the Star Soangked Banner from Woodstock. There are plenty of other choices of course.
 

Bleedred

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It’s George Harrison’s birthday. He was a reluctant star but his contributions cannot be oversold.
I wonder what he would have looked like today? He wasn’t aging nearly as well as the other two long surviving members and he died at a not very old age, while Ringo and Paul have cleared 80.

I thought the footage of him in the recent new song/video was AI generated or what he’d look like now.

Ringo looks really good, but you also barely ever see the guy without his glasses on and there’s no way he isn’t dying his hair and beard. I had more gray hair in my 30s than he does in his 80s and I really didn’t have hardly any gray hair in my 30s.
 

My3Sons

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I wonder what he would have looked like today? He wasn’t aging nearly as well as the other two long surviving members and he died at a not very old age, while Ringo and Paul have cleared 80.

I thought the footage of him in the recent new song/video was AI generated or what he’d look like now.

Ringo looks really good, but you also barely ever see the guy without his glasses on and there’s no way he isn’t dying his hair and beard. I had more gray hair in my 30s than he does in his 80s and I really didn’t have hardly any gray hair in my 30s.

Ringo does dye his hair and beard but I don’t think he’s had plastic surgery. Paul is starting to show his age but at least only partially dyes his hair now and he doesn’t get his beard
 

Bleedred

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Here’s more drama in my personal life, which I’ve discussed minimally on here and probably not in many years.

I have a real Mike Babcock of a family member, who if I told you stories about, you would think I was making shit up because who the f*** does these things? And I say Mike Babcock because it’s psychological warfare games that he plays. He’s been doing it for years now. Almost my whole life.

I still have (or had) a relationship with this person, despite cutting him off for years at different points. Once he got me so angry I cut off contact for years and didn’t even acknowledge he was living.

I made the mistake of bringing him back in 2018. This person has talked me up as the biggest underachiever to ever live. He constantly spews toxic beliefs and language. He does not approve of the job I have. Actually, he doesn’t believe I have a job but that’s a really long story and that’s how we got to this point again.

He doesn’t approve of anyone that I have ever been in a relationship with. He constantly has a negative view on it just because he likes to be alone and thinks everyone should be alone like he is.

He thinks everyone (or at least I) should have a real working man’s blue collar job like I used to and like he does.

He doesn’t accept the fact that I have a completely platonic friendship with a homosexual man (a non-white one at that!) and that I have a gay bestie, who has even slept over here. The only real friend I’ve ever had here, other than my best friend since we were kids, who I knew before either of us got here.

I’m not asking for advice on what to do, I know what to do and I already did it.

I just needed to vent a bit and this is the perfect place because it’s not social media, where you aren’t anonymous (I don’t use any of those sites anyway) and I could fill a decent book up with how toxic this person is.

You would shit if you knew some of the stupid, dumb shit this person has pulled. Its nothing traumatizing, just psychological, cockamamie, nonsensical bullshit.
 

My3Sons

Nobody told me there'd be days like these...
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Here’s more drama in my personal life, which I’ve discussed minimally on here and probably not in many years.

I have a real Mike Babcock of a family member, who if I told you stories about, you would think I was making shit up because who the f*** does these things? And I say Mike Babcock because it’s psychological warfare games that he plays. He’s been doing it for years now. Almost my whole life.

I still have (or had) a relationship with this person, despite cutting him off for years at different points. Once he got me so angry I cut off contact for years and didn’t even acknowledge he was living.

I made the mistake of bringing him back in 2018. This person has talked me up as the biggest underachiever to ever live. He constantly spews toxic beliefs and language. He does not approve of the job I have. Actually, he doesn’t believe I have a job but that’s a really long story and that’s how we got to this point again.

He doesn’t approve of anyone that I have ever been in a relationship with. He constantly has a negative view on it just because he likes to be alone and thinks everyone should be alone like he is.

He thinks everyone (or at least I) should have a real working man’s blue collar job like I used to and like he does.

He doesn’t accept the fact that I have a completely platonic friendship with a homosexual man (a non-white one at that!) and that I have a gay bestie, who has even slept over here. The only real friend I’ve ever had here, other than my best friend since we were kids, who I knew before either of us got here.

I’m not asking for advice on what to do, I know what to do and I already did it.

I just needed to vent a bit and this is the perfect place because it’s not social media, where you aren’t anonymous (I don’t use any of those sites anyway) and I could fill a decent book up with how toxic this person is.

You would shit if you knew some of the stupid, dumb shit this person has pulled. Its nothing traumatizing, just psychological, cockamamie, nonsensical bullshit.

Life’s too short to spend time with the toxic people who try to suck the life out of us
 

Bleedred

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Life’s too short to spend time with the toxic people who try to suck the life out of us
I don’t have to see this person, he lives too far away. Thank god.

This person has accused me of making up girlfriends, making up jobs. He sent me a picture of his pay stub (not with his actual pay amount though) and then asked for a picture of mine for proof that I work. That was back in 2015 when I cut him off. He claimed he called my employer and they told him no one by my name works there. I know he didn’t really call there and was trying to get me to crack and fall for it and tell him I didn’t really work there.

It’s been building up recently again, so I wasn’t blindsided. He’s been taking a lot of shots at me lately, got mad at me for complimenting myself and said self praise sucks and he doesn’t wanna hear it coming from me.

Last Friday he texted me a picture of him standing in front (he looks like he’s dying, god help me if that’s me in 19 years) of his work truck. And then asked to see a picture of me in front of my work truck. I immediately called him out on it and said I know what you’re doing there. He texted me asking why the rude replies and I must be having a bad day. Fortunately he gave up. He never tried again, but I blocked him 5 days later. He has a company phone that I don’t even know the number to. If I get anything from that area code I’ll know who it is and straight to the blocked list that number goes.

I really feel like texting him right now and telling him off and that he’ll die before he hears from me again. This is it man.

But I won’t do that. One useful thing he’s said in the past was that you tell someone to go f*** themselves without telling them to go f*** themselves.

I don’t even wanna use titles to say what he is to me, other than I swam out of his ballsack.
 

Bleedred

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Who the f*** asks for a picture in front of a work truck?

Why not a picture of me at the beach? Or at the hockey game? Or with my dog? Or in front of one of my personal vehicles?

I left out the best part. When I asked him why he wanted a picture of me in front of a work truck he said because he was making a photo album and one day he’ll be gone.

Who the f*** asks for that? “bleed this sounds made up”

I know it does. That’s how STUPID and PATHETIC this is.
 

My3Sons

Nobody told me there'd be days like these...
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I don’t have to see this person, he lives too far away. Thank god.

This person has accused me of making up girlfriends, making up jobs. He sent me a picture of his pay stub (not with his actual pay amount though) and then asked for a picture of mine for proof that I work. That was back in 2015 when I cut him off. He claimed he called my employer and they told him no one by my name works there. I know he didn’t really call there and was trying to get me to crack and fall for it and tell him I didn’t really work there.

It’s been building up recently again, so I wasn’t blindsided. He’s been taking a lot of shots at me lately, got mad at me for complimenting myself and said self praise sucks and he doesn’t wanna hear it coming from me.

Last Friday he texted me a picture of him standing in front (he looks like he’s dying, god help me if that’s me in 19 years) of his work truck. And then asked to see a picture of me in front of my work truck. I immediately called him out on it and said I know what you’re doing there. He texted me asking why the rude replies and I must be having a bad day. Fortunately he gave up. He never tried again, but I blocked him 5 days later. He has a company phone that I don’t even know the number to. If I get anything from that area code I’ll know who it is and straight to the blocked list that number goes.

I really feel like texting him right now and telling him off and that he’ll die before he hears from me again. This is it man.

But I won’t do that. One useful thing he’s said in the past was that you tell someone to go f*** themselves without telling them to go f*** themselves.

I don’t even wanna use titles to say what he is to me, other than I swam out of his ballsack.

I presume we are talking about your dad? My condolences. That’s as bad as it gets in many ways and he owes you much more than that. Just do what you can to let it go and be happy with the people who are in your life and bring joy to it.
 

Bleedred

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I presume we are talking about your dad? My condolences. That’s as bad as it gets in many ways and he owes you much more than that. Just do what you can to let it go and be happy with the people who are in your life and bring joy to it.
He’s pretty awful. He’s not the worst dad anyone has ever had. Trust me. People have been abused, people have been molested. People have been locked in cages by their dad/parents. People have been sex trafficked by a parent. Nothing like that ever happened to me. Ever. So it’s not that I had it rough at all.

But he’s also not a quality person at all. He was arrested and charged in his late 30s for having a sexual relationship with a 14-15 year old? Somehow he plead his way out of having to sign up on one of those registry’s, but he was on probation over it for a very long time. It’s been about 30 years now, I’m pretty sure he’s off.

He’s a very racist person. He didn’t approve of one long term girlfriend when I was young because she was Jewish. Well, he didn’t tell me not to be with her, but I constantly had to hear “she’s a Jew” and if he was talking about another Jewish person he knew he would say something even worse. Like they’re an H or they’re a K. I’m sure we know what words these are. I told him his grandkids might be Jews, so he better learn to accept that or leave us alone. Religion wasn’t important in her life, but I told her if she wanted a Jewish wedding and raise the kids Jewish, I’m more than fine with that because I’m not super into Catholicism or Christianity anyway. We never had kids and he berated me over losing her.

Another girlfriend he didn’t like (he never met her though) because she had Guatemalan in her.

This shit sounds so stupid typing it out. I’m laughing a little bit.

I’ve had racist family members. Some who I loved and I knew I couldn’t change their beliefs, so I had to just accept their rights to their opinions and beliefs. I think most of us can say that. But the other family weren’t so negative. My practicing Catholic family didn’t care if we had kids and decided to raise them Jewish. They didn’t care or berate me for dating a Guatemalan. They don’t care that I have a really strong bond with a friend who happens to be gay.

Thanks for actually reading these @My3Sons I’m having a real therapy session in here. If it’s not my heroin addicted friend it’s something else haha.
 

My3Sons

Nobody told me there'd be days like these...
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He’s pretty awful. He’s not the worst dad anyone has ever had. Trust me. People have been abused, people have been molested. People have been locked in cages by their dad/parents. People have been sex trafficked by a parent. Nothing like that ever happened to me. Ever. So it’s not that I had it rough at all.

But he’s also not a quality person at all. He was arrested and charged in his late 30s for having a sexual relationship with a 14-15 year old? Somehow he plead his way out of having to sign up on one of those registry’s, but he was on probation over it for a very long time. It’s been about 30 years now, I’m pretty sure he’s off.

He’s a very racist person. He didn’t approve of one long term girlfriend when I was young because she was Jewish. Well, he didn’t tell me not to be with her, but I constantly had to hear “she’s a Jew” and if he was talking about another Jewish person he knew he would say something even worse. Like they’re an H or they’re a K. I’m sure we know what words these are. I told him his grandkids might be Jews, so he better learn to accept that or leave us alone. Religion wasn’t important in her life, but I told her if she wanted a Jewish wedding and raise the kids Jewish, I’m more than fine with that because I’m not super into Catholicism or Christianity anyway. We never had kids and he berated me over losing her.

Another girlfriend he didn’t like (he never met her though) because she had Guatemalan in her.

This shit sounds so stupid typing it out. I’m laughing a little bit.

I’ve had racist family members. Some who I loved and I knew I couldn’t change their beliefs, so I had to just accept their rights to their opinions and beliefs. I think most of us can say that. But the other family weren’t so negative. My practicing Catholic family didn’t care if we had kids and decided to raise them Jewish. They didn’t care or berate me for dating a Guatemalan. They don’t care that I have a really strong bond with a friend who happens to be gay.

Thanks for actually reading these @My3Sons I’m having a real therapy session in here. If it’s not my heroin addicted friend it’s something else haha.

Your dad abused you in a different way. We can’t see the scars he gave you. It’s good you didn’t adopt his awful angry outlook and prejudices. Be the person you want to be. If he can’t accept you on your terms that’s his loss.
 

Bleedred

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Your dad abused you in a different way. We can’t see the scars he gave you. It’s good you didn’t adopt his awful angry outlook and prejudices. Be the person you want to be. If he can’t accept you on your terms that’s his loss.
I feel like I’ve been more abused by him as an adult than I was as a kid. He wasn’t there much when I was a kid. My mom and him split when I was about a year old. They were only 19 and 20 at that time. I’m glad they did. I got an amazing step brother out of it from the person my mom ended up marrying. Also a piece of shit, but for different reasons.

I have unfortunately inherited some ugly traits from him, though nothing despicable.

Though my propensity to say “I told you so! Told you he wasn’t gonna bounce back! And you people made me feel stupid! And I was right all along!” About the goalies is something I got from him.

When things went bad with my last girlfriend and I was trying to work things out, he kept telling me “hear me now, believe me later, it’s going nowhere!” (I know I’ve said the hear me now, believe me later line on this forum about goalies) and after it was over for good he would remind me what he told me and take his victory laps whenever she was brought up.

I have a good friend who was coaching me at the time. When I listened to this friend, his advice that I followed was the way I got her in the first place and what made her choose me. I did everything right on his orders. And then when I lost her initially, he started coaching me again. Near the end I told him “but my dad says you’re wrong! You’re just a stupid 30-something year old that knows nothing!” He told me forget that and listen to nobody about this but him. I was starting to get her back. When I let me friend steer the ship I was winning. Once I took control I capsized it. He told me I was so close; but I f***ed up in the final stretch. I stopped listening to this friend only because I had no emotional willpower.

My dad said “I was still right, wasn’t I?”. I know that burned my friend because he wanted us to prove him wrong. But it was my fault. He did the best he could.
 

Guadana

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Mar 7, 2012
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I don’t have to see this person, he lives too far away. Thank god.

This person has accused me of making up girlfriends, making up jobs. He sent me a picture of his pay stub (not with his actual pay amount though) and then asked for a picture of mine for proof that I work. That was back in 2015 when I cut him off.
Is he a bank? Or tax police?
I believe he is too old with his "parent" things.
I understand that it doesn't help when te figure of the father is negative in your eyes.
I believe that you should understand and forgive him. It doesn't mean you should be friend with him and chat with him. I believe he is a man of bad habits because he had bad childhood, I don't know what kind of people his parents were and what they did with him, or some childhood friends. I believe he had his own trauma experience. Please don't tell him that you chat with Russian ortodox jew(yeah) sometimes.

Its hard to separate mindset from people like this. Because they can insurance in different way - you should act and build your thinking with any effect of other person.

You need to understand yourself well, recognize where your thoughts and approaches are, and what is the result of influence, you should be honest with yourself, strict, but understanding and not punishing, you need to draw conclusions and understand how you can track your own thoughts and reactions and understand where to direct them. I understand that such work is difficult to do on your own, you probably need the help of a therapist. You need to find someone who will help sort it out, and not put on a needle of approval, support and the words "how good you are, how bad they all are."

____

We often write here about good things, but sometimes about bad one. I try to support people, not to swear too much at the team, and approach life optimistically.
It was my turn to tell a sad story.
I've been less active for the last three months because I'm finally working on a big animation project(it started in August) but beyond that, I finally felt what a depressive state is. My friends lived in a private house and they had a stove. Apparently, technologies were violated during construction and a fire occurred. As a result, only our friend was left alive, having lost her husband and animals. We communicate and meet with her a lot now and support her. Although it's not easy, I try to find words, approaches, and bring my experience with the loss of my father. But all this, of course, does not help enough and cannot help. Because it's the strongest than any words.

Dear friends, please check the state of fire protection in your homes, and if there is none, please spend money on it and on fire safety equipment.
 

Bleedred

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Is he a bank? Or tax police?
I believe he is too old with his "parent" things.
I understand that it doesn't help when te figure of the father is negative in your eyes.
I believe that you should understand and forgive him. It doesn't mean you should be friend with him and chat with him. I believe he is a man of bad habits because he had bad childhood, I don't know what kind of people his parents were and what they did with him, or some childhood friends. I believe he had his own trauma experience. Please don't tell him that you chat with Russian ortodox jew(yeah) sometimes.

Its hard to separate mindset from people like this. Because they can insurance in different way - you should act and build your thinking with any effect of other person.

You need to understand yourself well, recognize where your thoughts and approaches are, and what is the result of influence, you should be honest with yourself, strict, but understanding and not punishing, you need to draw conclusions and understand how you can track your own thoughts and reactions and understand where to direct them. I understand that such work is difficult to do on your own, you probably need the help of a therapist. You need to find someone who will help sort it out, and not put on a needle of approval, support and the words "how good you are, how bad they all are."

____

We often write here about good things, but sometimes about bad one. I try to support people, not to swear too much at the team, and approach life optimistically.
It was my turn to tell a sad story.
I've been less active for the last three months because I'm finally working on a big animation project(it started in August) but beyond that, I finally felt what a depressive state is. My friends lived in a private house and they had a stove. Apparently, technologies were violated during construction and a fire occurred. As a result, only our friend was left alive, having lost her husband and animals. We communicate and meet with her a lot now and support her. Although it's not easy, I try to find words, approaches, and bring my experience with the loss of my father. But all this, of course, does not help enough and cannot help. Because it's the strongest than any words.

Dear friends, please check the state of fire protection in your homes, and if there is none, please spend money on it and on fire safety equipment.
His childhood was better than a lot of people’s. He was adopted, as he was the result of an out of wedlock (that was a big deal when he was born, not so much almost 20 years later when I was born) teenage birth. The birth mother gave him up for adoption around 2-3 years old.

His parents were much older than him in comparison to me. They were well to do. Had a home up in North Jersey and a summer home down the shore. Perhaps he had issues deep down caused by his birth mother giving him up, but I’m not sure? There could always have been some other thing I don’t know about though.

Really sorry to hear about your friend. That’s definitely something much harder to cope with than anything I can imagine or have experienced in a very long time. Thats a horrible situation and I really feel for your friend who had to deal with the loss of her husband and pets. I hope she can heal because I’ll be honest, I’m not sure I could ever come back from something like that.

As far as fire safety goes, I have some good news around here on that. I was having a light flickering probably in the house recently. And I was having issues where my TV kept going out while being plugged into the outlet it’s always been plugged into. I had to inspect whether I was maybe having an issue with the outlet or not. At one point I was turning on the bathroom light and it was making my TV and cable box go out every time I turned it on. I had to stop using the light switch in that bathroom for a few weeks before I fixed the problem. Which unfortunately took several weeks just because I had to get permits.

I replaced the electrical panel/breaker box with a brand new one. The old one was the original one that’s almost 45 years old. I basically did this on my own, with my two friends just spotting me as bit as laborers. Old one was potentially starting to arc and that could cause a fire.

It took us an entire day. Been almost two weeks now. No flickering, no TV/cable box going out anymore. No flickering in the bathroom light or dining room. I was afraid for my dog’s safety, especially when I’m at work and she’s here by herself during the day.

Oh, and I do have a fire extinguisher here and always have. And I know how to use it.
 

My3Sons

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I feel like I’ve been more abused by him as an adult than I was as a kid. He wasn’t there much when I was a kid. My mom and him split when I was about a year old. They were only 19 and 20 at that time. I’m glad they did. I got an amazing step brother out of it from the person my mom ended up marrying. Also a piece of shit, but for different reasons.

I have unfortunately inherited some ugly traits from him, though nothing despicable.

Though my propensity to say “I told you so! Told you he wasn’t gonna bounce back! And you people made me feel stupid! And I was right all along!” About the goalies is something I got from him.

When things went bad with my last girlfriend and I was trying to work things out, he kept telling me “hear me now, believe me later, it’s going nowhere!” (I know I’ve said the hear me now, believe me later line on this forum about goalies) and after it was over for good he would remind me what he told me and take his victory laps whenever she was brought up.

I have a good friend who was coaching me at the time. When I listened to this friend, his advice that I followed was the way I got her in the first place and what made her choose me. I did everything right on his orders. And then when I lost her initially, he started coaching me again. Near the end I told him “but my dad says you’re wrong! You’re just a stupid 30-something year old that knows nothing!” He told me forget that and listen to nobody about this but him. I was starting to get her back. When I let me friend steer the ship I was winning. Once I took control I capsized it. He told me I was so close; but I f***ed up in the final stretch. I stopped listening to this friend only because I had no emotional willpower.

My dad said “I was still right, wasn’t I?”. I know that burned my friend because he wanted us to prove him wrong. But it was my fault. He did the best he could.

You can’t beat yourself up about this stuff. Just try to be yourself and don’t let the stuff you don’t like about your self be what you dwell on. Hang in there.
 

JimEIV

Registered User
Feb 19, 2003
66,301
28,740
@Bleedred

I have been drinking a lot so take this with two grains of salt.

I've read your last few post and made me think of all my best friends who have had similar situations.

I fish and hunt and all my friends fish or hunt. And what I have learned over the years is not everyone does it for the same reasons.

Some of us do it because it's tradition.
Some of us do it because we love the outdoors. And some of us do it to fill a hole deep in our soul....some of us do it for all the above.

But when you immerse yourself in something that consumes a considerable portion of your time that you can share with others you can fill those holes. It's not easy. The pain doesn't go away. But friends and focus on a specific task can change a perspective.

When I am not doing my best I immerse myself deep in the things I love with people that share the same passion. We don't usually air out our problems to each other even though we know we they are there. We focus on the next shot or catching the next fish and share the moment... that heals a lot of wounds.

Focus on those things that bring you joy with the people who appreciate them also...whatever they are. That is the essence of life and happiness.

Anyway I'm a little more than tipsy and I thought about deleting this a couple of times...but I thought the worst I can do is embarrass myself, the best is maybe make you feel a better. Worth the risk I guess ;)
 

njdevils1982

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Sep 8, 2006
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He’s pretty awful. He’s not the worst dad anyone has ever had. Trust me. People have been abused, people have been molested. People have been locked in cages by their dad/parents. People have been sex trafficked by a parent. Nothing like that ever happened to me. Ever. So it’s not that I had it rough at all.

But he’s also not a quality person at all. He was arrested and charged in his late 30s for having a sexual relationship with a 14-15 year old? Somehow he plead his way out of having to sign up on one of those registry’s, but he was on probation over it for a very long time. It’s been about 30 years now, I’m pretty sure he’s off.

He’s a very racist person. He didn’t approve of one long term girlfriend when I was young because she was Jewish. Well, he didn’t tell me not to be with her, but I constantly had to hear “she’s a Jew” and if he was talking about another Jewish person he knew he would say something even worse. Like they’re an H or they’re a K. I’m sure we know what words these are. I told him his grandkids might be Jews, so he better learn to accept that or leave us alone. Religion wasn’t important in her life, but I told her if she wanted a Jewish wedding and raise the kids Jewish, I’m more than fine with that because I’m not super into Catholicism or Christianity anyway. We never had kids and he berated me over losing her.

Another girlfriend he didn’t like (he never met her though) because she had Guatemalan in her.

This shit sounds so stupid typing it out. I’m laughing a little bit.

I’ve had racist family members. Some who I loved and I knew I couldn’t change their beliefs, so I had to just accept their rights to their opinions and beliefs. I think most of us can say that. But the other family weren’t so negative. My practicing Catholic family didn’t care if we had kids and decided to raise them Jewish. They didn’t care or berate me for dating a Guatemalan. They don’t care that I have a really strong bond with a friend who happens to be gay.

Thanks for actually reading these @My3Sons I’m having a real therapy session in here. If it’s not my heroin addicted friend it’s something else haha.

shit damn man ... people are f***ed. but you already know that.

 

Bleedred

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May 1, 2011
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I have been drinking a lot so take this with two grains of salt.

I've read your last few post and made me think of all my best friends who have had similar situations.

I fish and hunt and all my friends fish or hunt. And what I have learned over the years is not everyone does it for the same reasons.

Some of us do it because it's tradition.
Some of us do it because we love the outdoors. And some of us do it to fill a hole deep in our soul....some of us do it for all the above.

But when you immerse yourself in something that consumes a considerable portion of your time that you can share with others you can fill those holes. It's not easy. The pain doesn't go away. But friends and focus on a specific task can change a perspective.

When I am not doing my best I immerse myself deep in the things I love with people that share the same passion. We don't usually air out our problems to each other even though we know we they are there. We focus on the next shot or catching the next fish and share the moment... that heals a lot of wounds.

Focus on those things that bring you joy with the people who appreciate them also...whatever they are. That is the essence of life and happiness.

Anyway I'm a little more than tipsy and I thought about deleting this a couple of times...but I thought the worst I can do is embarrass myself, the best is maybe make you feel a better. Worth the risk I guess ;)
Definitely appreciate your words and glad you didn’t delete!

I’m fortunate to have a couple of really good friends locally here. Basically we just hang out and do whatever. Go to the beach, go on the boat. My best friend who I’ve known since childhood is the one who has the boat and has a dock right in his backyard. I have a pool that I spend a decent amount of time in, though not much this time of year. My best friend and his family have been really good to me and they do things like take care of my dog when I run out of town for the day (like to see a hockey game) and for a weekend when I went to North Carolina for the weekend for a family gathering last month. Recent I’ve been binging with the Sopranos and the Walking Dead with my other friend. Non-white, gay guy who I shouldn’t have in my hetero, aryan home. He’s never seen them before.

And i have a dog who makes me pretty happy, despite her not liking any of my company haha. I’m just blaming that on a chihuahua thing.

I just had a ton to get off my chest last night. I’m still trying to process how stupid the whole thing was.

The last big falling out we had I was so upset that he may think I’m a panhandler or something. Now I don’t care. As I said in one of my last messages to him. I don’t work, I’m a virgin and I shoplift all of my food and dog food for the week. :laugh:
 

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