OT: Off-Topic Thread - 2018 - It's summertime summertime sum sum summertime

[LSCII]

Obviously the story is an extreme case.

But if millennials are so "unprepared for life" as you said, wouldn't a large part of that be the fault of their parents, amongst other things?

Personally, I think there's a large number of my generation that are just absolutely pathetic humans. And they typically are the ones that had helicopter parents that would prop them up as being the greatest thing ever, and never scolding them, etc. But that's not my entire generation, not even close.

But it's hard to get out of your parents house when you graduate school with 50-150K in debt, are making 30K a year in an entry level position, and have to pay an exorbenant amount in rent every month.

Trust me, I did not want to be in my parents house as long as I was after college. It sucked, and it frankly put my life on hold. But it literally would ghave been impossible for me to afford to move out, pay loans, and then have money to feed myself.

Absolutely. Helicopter parents who are afraid to let their kids do something and fail, so they can learn from the experience, are a huge part of the issue.

 

[JRull86]

I have mixed thoughts on these things since I have two millennials living under my roof. While I do think my kids have a certain since of entitlement, they are pretty productive members of society. Son is in the police academy and worked three jobs before that, after going to school. My daughter is a vascular sonographer and will have 30+k of student loans, currently doing her externship (for no pay) so she works two other jobs as well. It's literally impossible for them to move out right now IMO. House/condo prices are double what they were when I bought, rent around here is 1600-2000 per month. Their car insurance is 300 each per month. I don't think they particularly love living at home (24 and 22) but it's a calm atmosphere where financially the four of us pull our own weight.

My kids would be able to live on their own if they could afford it, they are prepared, just not financially possible for them yet.

Also, my parents were of the "traditionalist" generation, and I'm Gen X.

This is exactly what I was saying.

It most cases, it's damn near impossible for people in my generation, which includes your kids, to move out on their own soon after school, if at all, for a few years minimum. I highly doubt anyone their age wants to actually be back in their parents house, but it's something that unfortunately has to happen to most people.

I was stuck working two shitty retail jobs because I couldn't find a job in my field, and had no other options. I graduated in 2008 right when the economy fell apart, so openings were really scarce. I worked 50+ hours a week on average and took home maybe $600 biweekly because it was I could find work wise. I literally could not leave. I was stuck in that cycle for a solid 4 years, because everything I applied for I was turned down because of my degree, or if it was something in my field, because I didn't have the experience.

I finally got a break in 2013 and I moved out in Feb of 2014 when I was 27.

It sucked because I felt like my life had been delayed for 4 years in terms of starting my career, meeting someone, etc. But it had to go the way it went because I had no other options.

So blanket statments about milennials not being "prepared" or some other nonsense, trigger me to no end though. If I was able to graduate, find a f***ing job that paid more than chump change, while being able to afford rent & other bills, plus put food on my table instead of moving back with my parents after school, I 100% would've been out of there. That wasn't the case.

Sorry for ranting, I just have a really big issue with this topic in general.

 

[JRull86]

Absolutely. Helicopter parents who are afraid to let their kids do something and fail, so they can learn from the experience, are a huge part of the issue.

I re-read your post after I quoted it, and after I went off later in this thread and I need to apologize. I thoguht you were being overly critical, but in reality we're on the same page.

 

[BigBadBruins7708]

This is exactly what I was saying.

It most cases, it's damn near impossible for people in my generation, which includes your kids, to move out on their own soon after school, if at all, for a few years minimum. I highly doubt anyone their age wants to actually be back in their parents house, but it's something that unfortunately has to happen to most people.

I was stuck working two ****ty retail jobs because I couldn't find a job in my field, and had no other options. I graduated in 2008 right when the economy fell apart, so openings were really scarce. I worked 50+ hours a week on average and took home maybe $600 biweekly because it was I could find work wise. I literally could not leave. I was stuck in that cycle for a solid 4 years, because everything I applied for I was turned down because of my degree, or if it was something in my field, because I didn't have the experience.

I finally got a break in 2013 and I moved out in Feb of 2014 when I was 27.

It sucked because I felt like my life had been delayed for 4 years in terms of starting my career, meeting someone, etc. But it had to go the way it went because I had no other options.

So blanket statments about milennials not being "prepared" or some other nonsense, trigger me to no end though. If I was able to graduate, find a ****ing job that paid more than chump change, while being able to afford rent & other bills, plus put food on my table instead of moving back with my parents after school, I 100% would've been out of there. That wasn't the case.

Sorry for ranting, I just have a really big issue with this topic in general.

nearly identical to my situation.

graduated in December 2007 with a business degree...talk about timing. Worked a myriad of random jobs over that time...computers at Best Buy, worked in a warehouse (honestly was a great job and a lot of fun), sold life insurance for a bit. Kept plugging away sending resumes and finally got a break when i got hired as a data analyst and have gone with that career path.

same as you, was stuck living at home at that time and hated every minute of it. Felt like I was spinning my wheels and life was on hold.

 

[Chief Nine]

100% agree with everything posted here.

The bolded is a big problem. Growing up, all throughout grade school into high school, all you heard was that college was the way to go, and essentially anyone that didn't go was going to end up working at McDonalds forever, which we all know isn't true whatsoever.

If I have kids, I know my wife and I will be talking about this with them, and how there's other options, etc. In 18-20 years, it will not be worth it to go to a school with no idea of what you want to do. General degrees aren't worth the money.

Personally I wouldn't trade my actual college experience, but I have a degree in a field (Graphic Design/Digital media) that I've never used, and never will.

I wish I took a year off between high school and college.

Mike Rowe has been advocating this and has put his money where his mouth is:

Profoundly Disconnected

He's doing this country a great service with this initiative

 

[BNHL]

I wonder if this is the son who was having health problems when Terry was coaching the Bruins- IIRC that was why he gave up coaching.

I believe he is the son that had liver problems

 

[BNHL]

That's sad, did they mention a cause?

No,I couldn't find anything other than the Bruins Alumni news.

 

[Olden McGroin]

Snow no! 15-30 cm of snow expected for central Newfoundland

If you live in central Newfoundland you might want to dig out the snowblower and shovels from storage.

Environment Canada is predicting between 15-30 cm of snow for the Grand Falls-Windsor, Bay of Exploits, Bonavista North, Gander and Terra Nova regions.

Rain is expecting to change to snow Wednesday evening and become heavier during the night.

Snow no! 15-30 cm of snow expected for central Newfoundland | CBC News

 

[Chief Nine]

Snow no! 15-30 cm of snow expected for central Newfoundland

If you live in central Newfoundland you might want to dig out the snowblower and shovels from storage.

Environment Canada is predicting between 15-30 cm of snow for the Grand Falls-Windsor, Bay of Exploits, Bonavista North, Gander and Terra Nova regions.

Rain is expecting to change to snow Wednesday evening and become heavier during the night.

Snow no! 15-30 cm of snow expected for central Newfoundland | CBC News

My heart goes out to you guys... man that has to suck!!!

 

[Dr Hook]

My heart goes out to you guys... man that has to suck!!!

There is a reason I live in Texas and have not lived in NE or anywhere in the north since I was 19 years old IN fact, we are looking at getting close to a 100 degrees already and nearly got there a week or two ago. I don't know, that might be worse than snow in some respects . . .

 

[LouJersey]

This is exactly what I was saying.

It most cases, it's damn near impossible for people in my generation, which includes your kids, to move out on their own soon after school, if at all, for a few years minimum. I highly doubt anyone their age wants to actually be back in their parents house, but it's something that unfortunately has to happen to most people.

I was stuck working two ****ty retail jobs because I couldn't find a job in my field, and had no other options. I graduated in 2008 right when the economy fell apart, so openings were really scarce. I worked 50+ hours a week on average and took home maybe $600 biweekly because it was I could find work wise. I literally could not leave. I was stuck in that cycle for a solid 4 years, because everything I applied for I was turned down because of my degree, or if it was something in my field, because I didn't have the experience.

I finally got a break in 2013 and I moved out in Feb of 2014 when I was 27.

It sucked because I felt like my life had been delayed for 4 years in terms of starting my career, meeting someone, etc. But it had to go the way it went because I had no other options.

So blanket statments about milennials not being "prepared" or some other nonsense, trigger me to no end though. If I was able to graduate, find a ****ing job that paid more than chump change, while being able to afford rent & other bills, plus put food on my table instead of moving back with my parents after school, I 100% would've been out of there. That wasn't the case.

Sorry for ranting, I just have a really big issue with this topic in general.

I really like having them at home. A hug goodnight feels as good today as twenty years ago. If they were slackers, obviously a different story, but things are different now.

When I started working, I had a company paid pension plan and full benefits paid. Now, I have to put 300/week into my retirement (no match) and pay 285/week for my medical. I was able to save while at home as was my wife because we weren't forced to take loans for school (she went to nursing, I went to 2 year, still didn't graduate lol) so we could put a small down payment on a condo (even then we got some help from parents) and let it appreciate and sold it. My mortgage plus taxes on my condo in one of the richest counties in America??? 750 bucks! Can you imagine? 2 bed room, 2 bathroom, spacious, with like 30 k down? Amazing.

Now, my "kids" have a car payment. Car insurance. Daughter has the loan. Here is that very same condo that we bought 26 years ago, for 120k.

https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/364-Cottonwood-Way-Mahwah,-NJ,-07430_rb/

You young people have ZERO shot to live the same way your parents lived early in life.

 

[BruinsFan1990]

Every generation has their fair share of losers.

 

[BruinsFan1990]

You young people have ZERO shot to live the same way your parents lived early in life.

And this is exactly why a good percentage of my generation still lives at home, especially in Massachusetts.

 

[Glove Malfunction]

Clearly this is a huge issue. The truth is that for many, college is not the best choice. You can and will make more than 30k a year starting out in a lot of trades. I estimate of the college freshman I teach each semester, over half should not be in university- they don't have the temperments, the interest, the ability, the preparation. The majority of these "unfit" for college kids would have been far better off doing a vocational degree/certificate of some kind: IT, EMT, HVAC, Medical billing, LVN etc. etc. Yet, we have a society that tells these kids and their parents that college is a non-negotiable. Or, these kids and parent feel like they have to send their kids to Northeastern, BC, BU, Harvard (in my area of the country it's Rice, Baylor, TCU, SMU) that are far too expensive and don't provide the value for money that they claim to do. Even state schools have gotten pricey.

I agree and disagree. I agree that college debt is a big issue that saddles a lot of kids with debt that seems mountainous and unmanageable. I also agree that a LOT of kids would be better off in a trade (I thought this of my youngest for a long time, until he found a vocation he's happy with. he's in school to be an ER nurse.) but society has made college the one and only path to success. (I know plumbers who make more that I do, so that's obviously not correct - it's just not popular). A lot of what matters as well is the course of study. Expecting to take on 80k of student debt and repay it with a degree in Music History is unrealistic.

Where I disagree is that parents feel they need to send their kids to expensive schools, and especially that they don't provide the value. I say this because I have a son who graduated from Northeastern (and got a good job from his co-op), and one who graduates from Brown next week. In both cases, the amount of scholarship and grants each one got reduced the cost to below what it would have cost to sent them to UMass. Not quite as true for my third son (nursing student), but the value is certainly there. Factor in the networking opportunities that these schools provide for their students and the value of name recognition, and the value is certainly there. I also know this from experience, having graduated from a different Ivy League school. The networking and value of name recognition is definitely valuable. Will this be the case for every private school? Certainly not. But in a lot of cases, it's valuable enough to warrant going to those schools. (all other extenuating circumstances accounted for, of course)

 

[BigBadBruins7708]

I really like having them at home. A hug goodnight feels as good today as twenty years ago. If they were slackers, obviously a different story, but things are different now.

When I started working, I had a company paid pension plan and full benefits paid. Now, I have to put 300/week into my retirement (no match) and pay 285/week for my medical. I was able to save while at home as was my wife because we weren't forced to take loans for school (she went to nursing, I went to 2 year, still didn't graduate lol) so we could put a small down payment on a condo (even then we got some help from parents) and let it appreciate and sold it. My mortgage plus taxes on my condo in one of the richest counties in America??? 750 bucks! Can you imagine? 2 bed room, 2 bathroom, spacious, with like 30 k down? Amazing.

Now, my "kids" have a car payment. Car insurance. Daughter has the loan. Here is that very same condo that we bought 26 years ago, for 120k.

https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/364-Cottonwood-Way-Mahwah,-NJ,-07430_rb/

You young people have ZERO shot to live the same way your parents lived early in life.

yeah, I got incredibly lucky in 1 aspect graduating when I did. Once I got a true full time job, the housing market and loan rates were in the tank so I was able to snag a house for pennies. lived on ramen for a while, but was able to get into a 1,500 sq ft one for 149k @ 4.25% fixed

 

[Dr Hook]

The networking and value of name recognition is definitely valuable. Will this be the case for every private school? Certainly not. But in a lot of cases, it's valuable enough to warrant going to those schools. (all other extenuating circumstances accounted for, of course)

You make a good point there, and one that I didn't think about. If we are measuring value for money in terms of opening doors, yeah that's probably correct in a lot of cases. The quality of the education is more what I had in mind, but your point is a good one and school reputation does enhance the worth of the degree. A Harvard MBA is going to count for more than one from the University of North Texas.

 

[LSCII]

There is a reason I live in Texas and have not lived in NE or anywhere in the north since I was 19 years old IN fact, we are looking at getting close to a 100 degrees already and nearly got there a week or two ago. I don't know, that might be worse than snow in some respects . . .

Yeah, we have snow and cold weather in the winter, but we very rarely have tornadoes touch down, and if they do, they're nowhere near the size that you guys get in Texas. Fun place to visit though. Never had a bad time there, regardless of where in Texas I went. And the BBQ is killer.

 

[DKH]

I really like having them at home. A hug goodnight feels as good today as twenty years ago. If they were slackers, obviously a different story, but things are different now.

When I started working, I had a company paid pension plan and full benefits paid. Now, I have to put 300/week into my retirement (no match) and pay 285/week for my medical. I was able to save while at home as was my wife because we weren't forced to take loans for school (she went to nursing, I went to 2 year, still didn't graduate lol) so we could put a small down payment on a condo (even then we got some help from parents) and let it appreciate and sold it. My mortgage plus taxes on my condo in one of the richest counties in America??? 750 bucks! Can you imagine? 2 bed room, 2 bathroom, spacious, with like 30 k down? Amazing.

Now, my "kids" have a car payment. Car insurance. Daughter has the loan. Here is that very same condo that we bought 26 years ago, for 120k.

https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/364-Cottonwood-Way-Mahwah,-NJ,-07430_rb/

You young people have ZERO shot to live the same way your parents lived early in life.

 

[LSCII]

I re-read your post after I quoted it, and after I went off later in this thread and I need to apologize. I thoguht you were being overly critical, but in reality we're on the same page.

No need to ever apologize. It's difficult to know on a board like this what someone is really saying at times. In this case, I don't blame the kids at all. I blame the parents that raised the kids and enabled the behaviors. For the record, as a parent, I fully understand why you want to make things as easy as possible for your child and why you want to shelter them from bad things. It's really hard to let them go through something difficult without wanting to step in and fix it for them. I struggle with it and my kids are still little.

 

[DarrenBanks56]

time for a random thought from me-

I just realized I have never seen a tornado. I have seriously had so many dreams about them. That seem so real, that I keep thinking Ive seen one. But in reality, I have never seen one in my life. so strange, and Im totally sober right now.

 

[Dr Hook]

Yeah, we have snow and cold weather in the winter, but we very rarely have tornadoes touch down, and if they do, they're nowhere near the size that you guys get in Texas. Fun place to visit though. Never had a bad time there, regardless of where in Texas I went. And the BBQ is killer.

The BBQ is great, my favorite haunt where I currently live is Stanley's Pit BBQ. Down around Austin, especially in a town called Lockhart, there is the best BBQ ever if you like the Texas style of it.

Tornados= bad, and scary at times. Haven't had one near where I live in a quite a while, but it is always a threat. I'll take a good snowstorm over that any time

 

[Dr Hook]

time for a random thought from me-

I just realized I have never seen a tornado. I have seriously had so many dreams about them. That seem so real, that I keep thinking Ive seen one. But in reality, I have never seen one in my life. so strange, and Im totally sober right now.

May I respectfully say that you don't really want to? At least not close enough to get a good look at it

 

[JRull86]

young people have ZERO shot to live the same way your parents lived early in life.

It's true, and I think it's finally dawning on my parents generation.

I can't tell you how many tinmes I had to hear something along the lines of "When I was your age" in regards to moving out, buying a house, etc. My parents, God bless them, just didn't get it for the longest time.

That's not to say they weren't supportive because they were.

I hope something changes for the generation tha my kids will be a part of, because frankly, I have no idea how they'll be able to live if everything keeps getting more and more expensive but wages don't continue to climb.

 

[JRull86]

No need to ever apologize. It's difficult to know on a board like this what someone is really saying at times. In this case, I don't blame the kids at all. I blame the parents that raised the kids and enabled the behaviors. For the record, as a parent, I fully understand why you want to make things as easy as possible for your child and why you want to shelter them from bad things. It's really hard to let them go through something difficult without wanting to step in and fix it for them. I struggle with it and my kids are still little.

Oh no doubt, and I'm sure I'll witness that first hand sooner rather than later.

I'll alwasy appreciate my parents for the fact that they'd let me make my decisions on things, good or bad, and then make me deal with the consequences of that decision. It's definitely helped me as an adult.

I'm 32, I manage a small team of people (4). I have 3 employees who are 30-33, and one who is 24. The 24 year old has no idea how to deal with stress, or problems, and expects to be praised for essentially doing his job. The other three? Not one bit.

My friend who manages a much larger team of people has the exact same complaint.

I wish parents could understand that they are doing their child a diservice by acting like that.

 

[Glove Malfunction]

You make a good point there, and one that I didn't think about. If we are measuring value for money in terms of opening doors, yeah that's probably correct in a lot of cases. The quality of the education is more what I had in mind, but your point is a good one and school reputation does enhance the worth of the degree. A Harvard MBA is going to count for more than one from the University of North Texas.

As you might imagine, a bunch of my classmates went on to get Harvard MBAs, and I can attest that what you say is quite true.