I am very unhappy

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Jiminy Cricket

#TeamMeat
Mar 9, 2014
2,178
2,115
I am not happy at all. Today is African American Friday. There is not a single thing that I want to buy despite my obscene wealth. I am thankful for absolutely nothing. Another one of my children died today and it was honestly the highlight of my day because I'm so miserable. At least it gave me something to do. Each passing second of my existence is a grave mistake and horrible injustice. Looking forward to suffering again tomorrow.
 
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Bombshell11

Registered User
Sponsor
Jul 21, 2022
1,657
1,683
Well if you self identify as black and are between 19-38 years old you're in luck.
You can have access to up to 60k of financing+tutoring to start a buisiness
AND
access up to 250k loan fund

Good luck
 
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JMCx4

Censorship is the Sincerest Form of Flattery
Sep 3, 2017
13,730
8,556
St. Louis, MO
Well if you self identify as black and are between 19-38 years old you're in luck.
You can have access to up to 60k of financing+tutoring to start a buisiness
AND
access up to 250k loan fund

Good luck
The self-identifying as black thing he can fake, but the age restrictions are a non-starter. Leave him to his suffering, which has clearly robbed him of his infamous writing style. WEE WANT ARE GIMINIE KRIKIT BACK!
 

Bombshell11

Registered User
Sponsor
Jul 21, 2022
1,657
1,683
The self-identifying as black thing he can fake, but the age restrictions are a non-starter. Leave him to his suffering, which has clearly robbed him of his infamous writing style. WEE WANT ARE GIMINIE KRIKIT BACK!

What stops anyone from self identifying as a 20 years old college girl?
 

Jiminy Cricket

#TeamMeat
Mar 9, 2014
2,178
2,115
I take it all back. One phone call has changed my life completely. I have been offered a dream opportunity as a Sales Associate at Strawbridge's. Words cannot explain my gratitude. Thank you for sticking with me, everybody. Never give up hope.
 
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Jiminy Cricket

#TeamMeat
Mar 9, 2014
2,178
2,115
Today is my 99th Birthday. 99 Year`s of misery. I have not been happy for even a single day. We must cherish every moment. I will likely have a heart attack within the next 6 month`s. I could pass away any second now. On top of that i was recently diagnosed with High sodium. That is the thank`s i get for serving in multiple War`s. Thank u for your service, now u can`t enjoy a slice of pizza. To hell with that. I am eating the whole pie.
 
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Jiminy Cricket

#TeamMeat
Mar 9, 2014
2,178
2,115
Where did the year`s go. I am 99 year`s old now. My pappy died at 99. My Granpappy died at 99. My Great Granpappy died at 99. My Great Great Granpappy died at 99. My Great Great Great Granpappy died at 99. My Great Great Great Great Granpappy died at 99. My Great Great Great Great Great Granpappy died at 99. My Great Great Great Great Great Great Granpappy died at 99. I will not make it to 100. My organ`s are shutting down. I have been incontinent for year`s. I have lost count of how many time`s i have shit my Pant`s. I remember when i was a young Stallion. The Year`s have disappeared in a blink of the eye.
 
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