Bravely bold Sir Dougie rode forth from Calgary. He was not afraid to die, o' brave Sir Dougie! He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways, Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Dougie! He was not at not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp Or to have his eyes gouged out, Or his elbows broken; To have his kneecaps split And his body burned away, Or his limbs all hacked and mangled, Brave Sir Dougie! His head smashed in, his heart cut out, His liver removed, and his bowels unplugged, His nostrils ravaged, and his bottom burned off.