The All Purpose "Jack Johnson Sucks" Thread

Will they need to add a sweetener to trade Johnson?


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Empoleon8771

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Aug 25, 2015
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Corvidae

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May 5, 2009
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I thought he had enough tools to turn it around with some decent coaching for a better team, but holy balls those numbers are damning. I'm moving over to the other side. That guy's magnetically attracted to goals against and there's not much else to be said. Too bad JR got into a weird public feud over the signing and can't get rid of him without looking like a complete idiot.
 

Randy Butternubs

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Mar 15, 2008
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cheesedanish87

Registered User
Jun 27, 2012
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I want some answers from Sully and the Pens organization why hes still playing.

Our anger should probably be directed toward Sully for playing him and JR for signing him.

I'm sure JJ is trying his best, but he just sucks, its not really his fault.
 

Empoleon8771

Registered User
Aug 25, 2015
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I thought he had enough tools to turn it around with some decent coaching for a better team, but holy balls those numbers are damning. I'm moving over to the other side. That guy's magnetically attracted to goals against and there's not much else to be said. Too bad JR got into a weird public feud over the signing and can't get rid of him without looking like a complete idiot.

I figured they wouldn't be good, but I audibly said "dear lord" when I saw them. I've seen individually worse players both offensively and defensively, but no one who is that bad in both. I'd have to try hard to find someone who's at a +10% threat level defensively and a -17% threat level offensively (both of which are bad).

What's interesting is that those stats say Johnson has actually been better defensively than offensively, and there are a good amount of players who have been worse defensively than Johnson this year. But that doesn't really count for much when you're that bad offensively and you're still bad defensively :laugh:

Edit: Actually, I already found someone who's probably worse than Johnson: Gudbranson with a -8% threat level offensively and a +29% (!!) threat level defensively in terms of relative stats. In terms of raw stats, he's at a -15% threat level offensively and a +25% threat level defensively. Yeah, that's way worse. Daley's numbers are also horrendous, to the point where I think he'd hurt the Penguins more than Johnson does.
 
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Andy99

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Jun 26, 2017
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If they primarily cared about winning, instead of saving face or making Sid happy, or having someone who hits or whatever, he would not be on the ice...everyone can see it by whatever test you want to use....the fans deserve an honest answer but they won’t get it...this should be the D pairs as anyone with eyes can see...

Dumo-Letang
Pettersson-Schultz
Maatta-Riikola
 
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ChaosAgent

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May 8, 2018
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I want to address the movability of his contract. Can there be a poll added on whether a sweetener (ie Sheary with Hunwick) needs to be added to move this or not? And if so, the magnitude of the sweetener (1st rounder, Rust, Simon/Bleuger versus say a 4th rounder?)

We have some posters who say, and I get this - "you can always find a sucker within the other 29 NHL GMs." There's some truth to this - I remember the Rangers getting bailed out of those Chris Drury/Scott Gomez contracts a decade ago. But then you have others who say "if other GMs wanted him at that contract last offseason, they would have offered it to him or beat our offer. They didn't."

I'd be really curious to see if the board thinks we'd need to add a sweetener to take the contract off our hands, and how much the sweetener would need to be.
 

Empoleon8771

Registered User
Aug 25, 2015
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I want to address the movability of his contract. Can there be a poll added on whether a sweetener (ie Sheary with Hunwick) needs to be added to move this or not? And if so, the magnitude of the sweetener (1st rounder, Rust, Simon/Bleuger versus say a 4th rounder?)

Yeah, I can add a poll. I'll just make it 3 options, no major sweetener, a minor sweetener (2nd round pick or less) or a significantly sweetener (roster player, 1st or top prospect). I'm making a 4th option too, Johnson will be trade straight up for a comparable contract.

Gudbranson being traded for value makes me think you won't need a sweetener, but I'll still make a poll for it.-
 
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ColePens

RIP Fugu Buffaloed & parabola
Mar 27, 2008
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cheesedanish87

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Jun 27, 2012
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EightyOne

My posts are jokes. And hockey is just a game.
Nov 23, 2016
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Everyone go dig up your signing hot takes. So we may ridicule each other better...

Just tell him every game is a playoff game.

We'll get point-per-game JMFJ that way.

...I think my theory might still work. He's been great at interference and holding already. NHL isn't calling shit. He'd be fine in playoffs.

Except he's also possibly helping this team not even make playoffs.
 

brewski420

Registered User
Sep 29, 2009
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Sometimes you get it right, sometimes you get it wrong, but i think i got the JJ signing correct.

I didn't remember how many debates i got into with posters who thought JJ getting benched last year was because of Torts rather then JJ poor play.

I was one of those posters. I was willing to give JR the benefit that he was right and JJ was worth the contract (not necessarily the term). I freely admit I was wrong.
 

K Fleur

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I hope for Crosby's sake he claimed this contract as a charitable donation in his tax filing.
 
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Gurglesons

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Dec 18, 2009
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I'm more mystified about why he doesn't seem to have NHL level offensive ability. I knew he was going to be an adventure in his own zone the minute JR signed him, but I was at least holding out hope he'd be that "rover" he looked like in LA (30+ points with iffy defense). Instead, only the iffy defense has happened.

He hasn’t for years and most of that did come from being the only capable offensive defenseman when younger on some of those teams.

Shows how much the NHL has changed in ten years in terms of D.
 

Gurglesons

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Sometimes you get it right, sometimes you get it wrong, but i think i got the JJ signing correct.

I didn't remember how many debates i got into with posters who thought JJ getting benched last year was because of Torts rather then JJ poor play.

My most infuriating conversations were about how “it would have no repercussions on the team because it is easily traded / bought out.”

My main point was always that he would take a spot no matter his level of play due to the contract which we are seeing and about to see once Schultz gets back.
 

Empoleon8771

Registered User
Aug 25, 2015
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Where is the poll option for "Bought out, because other teams think no sweetener is worth 5 years of ****"

In the same poll as "Jack Johnson will thrive as a top-4 defenseman once he gets settled in".

Johnson's cap hit isn't high enough for the Penguins to have to buy him out, because there will at least be a team willing to take him on to get an asset. The worst case scenario is that they'd have to keep him for 2 years and then move him. The Penguins traded Michalek in 2012 with taking no salary back after 2 bad years by him with 3 years left on his deal, I really don't think trading Johnson with 3 years left on his deal would be difficult. I'm really curious to see the justification from people who think the Penguins will have to add a significant asset on top of JJ for why they think that, because there aren't many trades of guys making similar money to Johnson that suggest that.
 
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Sidney the Kidney

One last time
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He hasn’t for years and most of that did come from being the only capable offensive defenseman when younger on some of those teams.

Shows how much the NHL has changed in ten years in terms of D.

But he's not even competent at passing/handling the puck anymore. I can understand a bit of regression where a player goes from good to average or something. But it's like he went from a 30-40 point guy with good puck skills, to Rob Scuderi. It would be like if Justin Schultz suddenly started handling the puck like Hal Gill.

It's just weird. Especially at his age. It's not like he's Ron Hainsey in his late 30s. He's still at the age were a lot of defensemen are in their "prime".
 
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Empoleon8771

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Aug 25, 2015
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But he's not even competent at passing/handling the puck anymore. I can understand a bit of regression where a player goes from good to average or something. But it's like he went from a 30-40 point guy with good puck skills, to Rob Scuderi. It would be like if Justin Schultz suddenly started handling the puck like Hal Gill.

It's just weird. Especially at his age. It's not like he's Ron Hainsey in his late 30s. He's still at the age were a lot of defensemen are in their "prime".

He's no longer an effective PPQB, that's the biggest reason why his point totals fell. Look at the years he put up 30-40 points, he consistently had half of those points on the powerplay. Johnson over his entire career has been a really bad ES point producer, his best ES season was 23 points in 2009-2010. He has been below 20 ES points in all but 3 seasons in the NHL.
 
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