I Haven`t work`d a Day in my Live `n` I Literally Leech off of Govermen`t Benefit`s ;D

[Bones Malone]

I Haven`t work`d a Day in my Live `n` I Literally Leech ovv of Govermen`t benefit`s.

I Liderally make a 6ix figure Salamander on Uncle Sam`s dime. I`m Literally Exploitin`g the Sistem `n` Freeloadin`g off of Tax`Payer`s. All I do is Take, Take, Take `n` Contribute literally absolutely NOTHIN`g in Return. I`m literally Moochin`g `n` Cruisin`g around in my $7,0,0,0,0 Dollar Escalade wile Folk`s are Literally Slavin`g away 2 Suppor`t me. I`ve Never Pay`d Tax`s or Work`d an Day in my Live, but I live an Luxurious LiveStyle thank`s 2: WELFARE. I Liderally eat like an Kin`g thank`x`s 2 Hard Workin`g AnMerican`s whom Make it all Possible.

Have you met my friend @Roman Fell? I feel like you guys would get along great.

 

[Kairi Zaide]

6 months ago : this thread
This week : How the **** am I supposed to feed my family

 

[LarryFisherman]

6 months ago : this thread
This week : How the **** am I supposed to feed my family

yeah, i guess his asshole is so loose after 6 months of dudes double dutching it that it's become difficult to feed the family, amirite @Jiminy Cricket

 

[Jiminy Cricket]

I Just Lie`d on my Welfare Form`s 2 get another $1000 Dollar`s per month. Take that, Andrew Yang! I`ve pocket`d over $2.3 Million Dollar`s from Welfare 2 date, The Ultimate Scam.

 

[Jiminy Cricket]

WELL, WELL, WELL. Thank`s 2 the CoronaVirus, My Goverment is now offering a ADDITIONAL $600 DOLLAR`S / WEEK FOR THE NEX`T 4 MONTH`S 4 UNEMPLOYMENT. ALONG WITH THE NEW STIMULUS CHEQUE I WILL NOW PROFIT A ADDITIONAL $11,000 FROM THIS CRISIS. THANK U GOVERMENT `N` THANK U WELFARE FOR THIS WINDFALL OF XTRA KASH, WITCH I WILL USE 2 BUY A NEW BOAT FOR MY FAMBLY.

 

[Chonged]

I am all bored because apparently the auctions are not essenchal but I need to buy lockers so I can make a living. My girlfriend wants me to sign up for the government payout, but I cant because she told me to only take cash cause it saves on taxes or something. I don't know what I am going to do. I did switch to modelo tho. Eff that virus.

 

[Bones Malone]

 

[Jiminy Cricket]

UPDATE: I AM NOW COLLECTIN`G WELFARE BENEFIT`S FROM MULTIPLE STATE`S, I Jus`t simply lie`d on my form`s `n` Said I Live`d in those State`s `n` now I Am makin`g Double, Triple, Quadruple wat I Was makin`g Before. I Literally just Lie on my Form`s and Collect money, It`s Literally that Simple. I AM LITERALLY MAKING A HEALTHY 6IX FIGURE SALAMANDER OVV OF WELFAIR `n` GETTIN`g RITCHER `n` RITCHER `n` RITCHER `n` RITCHER `n` ON TOP OF THAT I AM GOING 2 HEAVEN BECAUSE I LITERALLY BELIEF IN GOSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Jiminy Cricket]

GOSH BLESS POTATO CHIP`S, MY FAVOURITE SNACK 2 SNACK ON WHILE COLLECTIN`G: WELFARE CHEQUE`S

 

[Jiminy Cricket]

I am Now collecting welfare in all 50 State`s.

 

[Jiminy Cricket]

I am Now collectin`g Disability,,, Just Lied on my Form`s,,, Told the Goverment I Have bad Feet, Even tho my Feet are Literally Perfec`t `n` Beautiful!!!

 

[Smirnov2Chistov]

I am Now collectin`g Disability,,, Just Lied on my Form`s,,, Told the Goverment I Have bad Feet, Even tho my Feet are Literally Perfec`t `n` Beautiful!!!

lies, you have warts!

 

[Bumpus]

WELL, WELL, WELL. Thank`s 2 the CoronaVirus, My Goverment is now offering a ADDITIONAL $600 DOLLAR`S / WEEK FOR THE NEX`T 4 MONTH`S 4 UNEMPLOYMENT. ALONG WITH THE NEW STIMULUS CHEQUE I WILL NOW PROFIT A ADDITIONAL $11,000 FROM THIS CRISIS. THANK U GOVERMENT `N` THANK U WELFARE FOR THIS WINDFALL OF XTRA KASH, WITCH I WILL USE 2 BUY A NEW BOAT FOR MY FAMBLY.

Would you be interested in some new water skis to go with that boat? They fell off of this truck I was following. I’m looking to get either $0.35 on the dollar worth of food stamps, or authenticated color photographs of Bea Arthur’s feet.

PM for further details.

 

[Jiminy Cricket]

Another $2000 Dollar`s plus $300 Dollar`s / Week in UmEmployment, This ProGram is Makin`g me Million`s. Thank`s 2 the CoromaVirus, I have now Profit`d over $100,000 Dollar`s `n` will be Purchasing an 4 Pack of A`T`V`s for the Whole Fambly!!! When is the Nex`t Pandemic because I Am getting Literally ritch from this Virus.

 

[HisIceness]

Kobe Bryant would not be proud

 

[MetalheadPenguinsFan]

Kobe Bryant would not be proud

This.

What would Kobable Bryng Brong think?? @Jiminy Cricket

 

[Jiminy Cricket]

I Love blowin`g all my Food Stamp`s on S`take dinner`s, McDonald`s, Godiva Chockolate, U name it. I`m liderally blowin`g all my Food stamp`s on Filet minYon `n` then announcin`g 2 all the Karen`s in line that I`m payin`g 4 it with Food S`tamp`s `n` then I Cackle `n` Cough in there Face`s!!! My Gr8 GranPappy invent`d the Cack `n` Coff technique back in 1972 @ a Job interview, he got Promote`d on the Spot. I Love Cacklin`g `n` Coughing in People`s face`s `n` then S`pending there hard earn`d Tax Dollar`s on Junk Food.

 

[HFBS]

Whatever you spend your money on it certainly isn't comedy lessons.

 

[Jiminy Cricket]

Hillary Clapton once Said. It Take`s a Village. Well you`re Damb rite, Because im Sure as Hell not Takin`g Kare of my Children. That`s the Cricket Guarantee. I have 7, 8, 9, 10, 11 Kid`s `n` I`ve never Even pay`d Child support. But I Clame them on my tax Form`s, so i Can get more Welfare! Don`t hate the Player, Hate the Ghame.

 

[Tarantula]

Tarantulas love a thriving cricket population. Just keep chirping...

 

[MetalheadPenguinsFan]

Hillary Clapton once Said. It Take`s a Village. Well you`re Damb rite, Because im Sure as Hell not Takin`g Kare of my Children. That`s the Cricket Guarantee. I have 7, 8, 9, 10, 11 Kid`s `n` I`ve never Even pay`d Child support. But I Clame them on my tax Form`s, so i Can get more Welfare! Don`t hate the Player, Hate the Ghame.

Brb.

Calling Ch’yld Well-Fair on u 4 being a deadbeat looz-her that sit’s around all day n n’ite coal-ecting Well-Fair Check’s n Makin’g Baybeez

#RapItUp
#GettaRealJob
#EasyBakeOven

 

[MetalheadPenguinsFan]

Hillary Clapton once Said. It Take`s a Village. Well you`re Damb rite, Because im Sure as Hell not Takin`g Kare of my Children. That`s the Cricket Guarantee. I have 7, 8, 9, 10, 11 Kid`s `n` I`ve never Even pay`d Child support. But I Clame them on my tax Form`s, so i Can get more Welfare! Don`t hate the Player, Hate the Ghame.

Ko’Babble Bring Brong would not approve James.

 

[alikaka]

I also live on a government grant and I have to save money on everything I can, so the other day I made a good deal for myself, which is to change the energy supplier who will provide me with good energy at a nice price. My income is not much of it practically. While energy bills above £2,000 a year are only 6% of the average income of a middle-income household, they eat up 18% of a low-income family's earnings. That goes up to 25% for single parents and childless couples. Here I have found a new energy supplier for what I hope will significantly reduce my expenses.

 

[Jiminy Cricket]

I LUV SPENDING MY WELFARE CHEX ON T.G.I. FRIDAY`S LOAD`D POTATO SKIN`S, I WAS LIDERALLY AT THE GROCERY STORE WAVING WAD`S OF CASH IN FRONT OF THIS LADY AND SAID U PAID FOR THIS. SHE SAID JAME`S, 1 DAY U WILL GET WAT`S COMING 2 U. `N` I SAID YOUR DAMB RITE, `N` WHAT`S COMING IS ANOTHER WELFARE CHECK. LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[HisIceness]

James, this is not the Mamba mentality. Kobe would not be pleased.