Le Barron de HF
Justin make me proud
ColePens
The Great ChrisCutter Bash
July 25 2018
Pittsburgh PA
Civic Arena
"Stone Cold" Steve Austin (c) vs. Samoa Joe - WWF Championship
Kota Ibushi (c) vs. Marty Scurll - Intercontinental Championship
Raven vs. Aleister Black - NO DQ Match: If Black loses, he joins the flock
Jay Lethal (c) vs. Tajiri vs. Austin Aries vs. Trevor Lee vs. Evan Bourne vs. Chris Sabin vs. Kazarian LADDER MATCH for the X-Division Championship
Nikki Cross (c) vs. Gail Kim for the WWF Women's Championship
Braun Strowman vs. Ultimate Warrior
Stan Hansen vs. Tazz
American Alpha vs America's Most Wanted (James Storm/Chris Harris) for the WWF Tag Team Championship
vs
JackSlater
SUMMERFEST 29
Ring Announcer: Eden Stiles
JackSlater Promotions President: Bill Watts
1. No Blows to the Face Match: Alex Shelley vs. Dalton Castle (With The Boys)
2. The Sunny Side: Mike Awesome, Chad & Tad (Formerly John Laurinaitis and Terry Taylor) (With Tammy Sytch) vs. Kill Machine: Killian Dain, War Machine Hanson, Dave Mastiff (With Lou Albano)
3. Rick Rude vs. Keith Lee
4. Intercontinental Championship Match*: Tully Blanchard (Champion, With Chris Nowinski) vs. Fit Finlay vs. Dr. Death Steve Williams vs. Gary Albright
Special Guest Referee: Bill Watts
*Tully Blanchard must take the fall for the title to change hands
Live Stream Update on Angelo Poffo’s Health
5. Women’s Championship Match*: Toni Storm (With The Prince of Wrestling) vs. Aja Kong (Champion)
*If Aja Kong wins, she gets three minutes alone in the ring with The Prince of Wrestling
6. Roman Reigns (With Tammy Sytch) vs. Ricky Steamboat
7. Tex Ferguson & Chad 2 Badd vs. The Murdoch Boys (Dick Murdoch and Trevor Murdoch)*
*Winner gets the baby blue Camaro
8. Kenta Kobashi vs. Tomohiro Ishii
9. Best 2/3 Falls Heavyweight Championship Match: Macho Man Randy Savage (Champion, With Miss Elizabeth) vs. Mankind/Dude Love/Cactus Jack
Background:
No Blows to the Face Match: Alex Shelley vs. Dalton Castle (With The Boys)
Never content with merely wrestling, the party peacock Dalton Castle insisted that wrestling’s only paparazzi photographer Alex Shelley take some candid beauty shots to add to his extensive portfolio. Ultimately the shots ended up too candid and rather unflattering to Castle, with shots of him with food in his glorious mustache, crocs on his feet, a puka shell necklace tight to his neck, and even a traditional wrestling fanny pack around his waist. After Shelley leaked (or was hacked, as he claimed) some of the photos, Castle retaliated by dying Shelley’s trademark faux hawk a boring brown and scratching the lens of his favourite camera. Despite the fierce heat of their blood feud, both men have agreed that even revenge isn’t worth damaging their beautiful faces.
The Sunny Side: Mike Awesome, Chad & Tad (Formerly John Laurinaitis and Terry Taylor) (With Tammy Sytch) vs. Kill Machine: Killian Dain, War Machine Hanson, Dave Mastiff (With Lou Albano)
Since Tammy Sytch first arrived in JackSlater Promotions her touch has been golden. The pants-suit wearing vixen took the downtrodden San Jose Wreckers, Chad Lawrence and Tad Taylor, and turned them into tag team champions. She took Mike Awesome, languishing in the mid card, cut his stupid mullet that she said made him look like almost as much of a hillbilly as the typical wrestling fan, told him to shut up and listen to her, and led him to the top. With her brains, and the occasional feminine wiles, Ms. Sytch has had no trouble keeping her oafs in line. The only speed bump in her ascent took place when she bumped into a group of hairy, sweaty men backstage and overreacted. Proclaiming them gross, Sunny had her boys deliver a brutal beatdown to Hanson and his former teammate, who was so severely injured that he had to leave for a lesser promotion. The similarly unique looking Killian Dain jumped in to help and created the new team Kill Machine, which has been augmented by manager Lou Albano and his charge Dave Mastiff. The honour of bearded fat men everywhere is on the line.
Rick Rude vs. Keith Lee
Newcomer Keith Lee has won many fans over with his larger than life presence and charisma. Rick Rude however, finds Lee to be merely larger than large. During one of his trademark pre-match verbal assaults Rude began comparing the typical inner city sweathog to Keith Lee, prompting Lee to run to the ring. Rude insulted Lee further, commenting that he was too busy eating fried chicken and chicken wings to get the kind of body that could compete with the Ravishing One. Lee retorted that while he was in fact a fan of fried chicken, like any other red-blooded male, it was Rude who was walking around on little chicken legs. Since then crowds have been chanting “chicken legs” at Rude, despite his furious proclamations that this is an upper body business. A fuming Rude has challenged Lee to a pose down, a race and a pushup contest, with each event having been won by Lee. Upon Lee’s victories and the continued chants from the crowd Rude has snapped, prompting a final showdown to decide what a real wrestler looks like.
Intercontinental Championship Match*:Tully Blanchard (Champion, With Chris Nowinski) vs. Fit Finlay vs. Dr. Death Steve Williams vs. Gary Albright
Special Guest Referee: Bill Watts
*Blanchard must take the fall for the title to change hands
Tully Blanchard has long been claiming that he is suffering the effects of a serious concussion, often paradoxically wearing a neckbrace to the ring and refusing to defend his title. He has resisted attempts by Bill Watts to strip him of his title by bringing in concussion advocate and Harvard grad Chris Nowinski to argue that no one should have to lose status at work due to concussions and even threatening to sue due to his “unsafe work environment”. Attempts by Blanchard and Nowinski to have blows to the head banned, which Blanchard claims will allow the fans to enjoy Tully Blanchard’s wrestling for as long as possible, have fallen on deaf ears after Tully delivered a piledriver on the cold concrete to Finlay in a previous match, in which head blows were banned, to retain his belt via disqualification. Watts has now scheduled a four-way title match, blows to the head allowed, with the stipulation that the title can only change hands if Blanchard himself is pinned.
Live Stream Update on Angelo Poffo’s health
“The Miser” Angelo Poffo has been laid up for weeks since his brutal beating at the hands of Cactus Jack. He joins us from his bed at the Sisters of Saint Martha convent to update us on the status of his health.
Women’s Championship Match*: Toni Storm (With The Prince of Wrestling) vs. Aja Kong
*If Aja Kong wins, she gets three minutes alone in the ring with The Prince of Wrestling
The Prince of Wrestling has been near the top of women’s division since its debut several months ago. His young protégé Toni Storm has been the beneficiary of the Prince’s antics as he has provided ample distractions for her to capitalized on during her matches. This recipe for success has proved ineffective against the rather rotund, bi-racial Aja Kong however, as the women’s champion has thus far ignored the Prince’s vulgar jabs and instead focused on brutalizing Storm as the Prince flees. With Storm and the Prince desperate to have the gold around the Prince’s waist but with Kong having nothing to prove, Bill Watts has stepped in and added the stipulation that while Storm gets a title shot, Kong gets three minutes alone in the ring with the Prince should she prove victorious. Perhaps the public will finally find out if the Prince does EVERYTHING as well as he claims.
Roman Reigns (With Tammy Sytch) vs. Ricky Steamboat
JackSlater Promotions’ brilliant bombshell, Tammy Sytch, is used to getting what she wants. After taking her protégé Mike Awesome to the cusp of the main event, Ms. Sytch was shocked to see him defeated by the ultimate everyman, Ricky Steamboat. Steamboat caught the vixen’s eye, though her attempts to seduce him, through propositions both business based and otherwise, failed. Enraged, the proud Ms. Sytch called upon her daddy for the money to hire Roman Reigns, who long ago stopped trying to appease fans and now works for whoever pays up. After a series of increasingly brutal attacks by Reigns, particularly one that left Steamboat bloody in front of his son and wife at May Day Massacre, wrestling’s ultimate family man has partially given in to Ms. Sytch’s demands and agreed to share the ring, if not the bed, with her as he confronts Reigns. Ms. Sytch remains confident that with Reigns as her shield, she will soon have Steamboat as the sword to her sheath.
Tex Ferguson & Chad 2 Badd vs. The Murdoch Boys (Dick Murdoch and Trevor Murdoch)
* Winner gets the baby blue Camaro
Good friends and better enemies, Tex Ferguson and Chad 2 Badd have reunited for a common goal – saving
Tex’s beautiful baby blue Camaro, replete with a 350 under the hood and dual exhaust, from the clutches of The Murdoch Boys, Dick and Trevor. While the two former compadres had been engaged in a blood feud over the affections of Susie, neither could stand to see what was happening to the car in which they had each become very good friends with Susie for the first time. With the Murdochs taking Tex’s blue baby out muddin, having the confederate flag painted on it, and shooting antique cans off the hood, the boys from Southpaw have had just about all that they can take.
Kenta Kobashi vs. Tomohiro Ishii
Tomohiro Ishii has long looked up to Kenta Kobashi, quietly dreaming of one day facing off against the legend despite being far lower in the company hierarchy. In a rare interview, Ishii revealed that he always dreamed of facing Kobashi and being the first man to kick out of his famous Burning Hammer, which has been used only seven times ever. Shortly after Summerfest XX-8 Ishii challenged Kobashi, only for the legend to politely refuse. In response Ishii began running roughshod over the middle of the card and established a long winning streak. Challenging Kobashi again, Ishii was tersely told that he was too small to fight. An enraged Ishii began observing Kobashi’s matches from ringside and even attacking Kobashi’s opponents before they reached the ring, incensing the legend. Ishii has claimed that he needs to face Kobashi in order to have a respectable career and that if he merely receives the Burning Hammer, even without kicking out, it will be enough to allow him to retire with honour. Kobashi has finally relented but warned Ishii that he is playing with fire and is asking to be burned.
Best 2/3 Falls Heavyweight Championship Match: Macho Man Randy Savage (Champion, With Miss Elizabeth) vs. Mick Foley
Macho Man Randy Savage has long reigned as heavyweight champion and face of JackSlater Promotions. Things took a slight turn however after Miss Elizabeth, ever sympathetic, tended to a severely wounded Mankind after his brutal May Day Massacre match vs Kenta Kobashi. Mankind grew infatuated with Miss Elizabeth, drawing the ire of a jealous Savage and eliciting multiple beatings as he showed up at Savage matches armed with dull roses. Savage was further flummoxed when Dude Love began appearing at his matches, and even in his locker room, professing his admiration for Savage and how Savage was what every cool cat aspired to be. This further infuriated Savage and even caused him to lose matches via disqualification due to interference via Mankind or Dude Love and countouts. Following a blowup where Savage left Mankind/Dude Love as a bloody pulp, Cactus Jack emerged. Cactus was a fan of neither Elizabeth nor Savage and claimed that he was there to protect Mankind and Dude Love, whose crimes were merely “loving” Savage and his wife. After brutalizing Savage repeatedly, hospitalizing Angelo Poffo and seemingly leaving Miss Elizabeth injured backstage, Cactus became Savage’s target. Fans have been torn between supporting the sympathetic Mankind along with the humourous Dude Love and jeering the brutal Cactus Jack. Attempts to challenge Cactus Jack saw Dude Love or Mankind emerge in his place, enraging Savage who accused Cactus Jack, the only personality Savage claims is really there, of playing games in an attempt to distract him and eventually take the title. It has been decided that Savage will take on Mankind/Dude Love/Cactus Jack in a best 2/3 falls match, with Macho vowing to make Cactus Jack, in particular, pay
The Great ChrisCutter Bash
July 25 2018
Pittsburgh PA
Civic Arena
"Stone Cold" Steve Austin (c) vs. Samoa Joe - WWF Championship
Kota Ibushi (c) vs. Marty Scurll - Intercontinental Championship
Raven vs. Aleister Black - NO DQ Match: If Black loses, he joins the flock
Jay Lethal (c) vs. Tajiri vs. Austin Aries vs. Trevor Lee vs. Evan Bourne vs. Chris Sabin vs. Kazarian LADDER MATCH for the X-Division Championship
Nikki Cross (c) vs. Gail Kim for the WWF Women's Championship
Braun Strowman vs. Ultimate Warrior
Stan Hansen vs. Tazz
American Alpha vs America's Most Wanted (James Storm/Chris Harris) for the WWF Tag Team Championship
vs
JackSlater
SUMMERFEST 29
Ring Announcer: Eden Stiles
JackSlater Promotions President: Bill Watts
1. No Blows to the Face Match: Alex Shelley vs. Dalton Castle (With The Boys)
2. The Sunny Side: Mike Awesome, Chad & Tad (Formerly John Laurinaitis and Terry Taylor) (With Tammy Sytch) vs. Kill Machine: Killian Dain, War Machine Hanson, Dave Mastiff (With Lou Albano)
3. Rick Rude vs. Keith Lee
4. Intercontinental Championship Match*: Tully Blanchard (Champion, With Chris Nowinski) vs. Fit Finlay vs. Dr. Death Steve Williams vs. Gary Albright
Special Guest Referee: Bill Watts
*Tully Blanchard must take the fall for the title to change hands
Live Stream Update on Angelo Poffo’s Health
5. Women’s Championship Match*: Toni Storm (With The Prince of Wrestling) vs. Aja Kong (Champion)
*If Aja Kong wins, she gets three minutes alone in the ring with The Prince of Wrestling
6. Roman Reigns (With Tammy Sytch) vs. Ricky Steamboat
7. Tex Ferguson & Chad 2 Badd vs. The Murdoch Boys (Dick Murdoch and Trevor Murdoch)*
*Winner gets the baby blue Camaro
8. Kenta Kobashi vs. Tomohiro Ishii
9. Best 2/3 Falls Heavyweight Championship Match: Macho Man Randy Savage (Champion, With Miss Elizabeth) vs. Mankind/Dude Love/Cactus Jack
Background:
No Blows to the Face Match: Alex Shelley vs. Dalton Castle (With The Boys)
Never content with merely wrestling, the party peacock Dalton Castle insisted that wrestling’s only paparazzi photographer Alex Shelley take some candid beauty shots to add to his extensive portfolio. Ultimately the shots ended up too candid and rather unflattering to Castle, with shots of him with food in his glorious mustache, crocs on his feet, a puka shell necklace tight to his neck, and even a traditional wrestling fanny pack around his waist. After Shelley leaked (or was hacked, as he claimed) some of the photos, Castle retaliated by dying Shelley’s trademark faux hawk a boring brown and scratching the lens of his favourite camera. Despite the fierce heat of their blood feud, both men have agreed that even revenge isn’t worth damaging their beautiful faces.
The Sunny Side: Mike Awesome, Chad & Tad (Formerly John Laurinaitis and Terry Taylor) (With Tammy Sytch) vs. Kill Machine: Killian Dain, War Machine Hanson, Dave Mastiff (With Lou Albano)
Since Tammy Sytch first arrived in JackSlater Promotions her touch has been golden. The pants-suit wearing vixen took the downtrodden San Jose Wreckers, Chad Lawrence and Tad Taylor, and turned them into tag team champions. She took Mike Awesome, languishing in the mid card, cut his stupid mullet that she said made him look like almost as much of a hillbilly as the typical wrestling fan, told him to shut up and listen to her, and led him to the top. With her brains, and the occasional feminine wiles, Ms. Sytch has had no trouble keeping her oafs in line. The only speed bump in her ascent took place when she bumped into a group of hairy, sweaty men backstage and overreacted. Proclaiming them gross, Sunny had her boys deliver a brutal beatdown to Hanson and his former teammate, who was so severely injured that he had to leave for a lesser promotion. The similarly unique looking Killian Dain jumped in to help and created the new team Kill Machine, which has been augmented by manager Lou Albano and his charge Dave Mastiff. The honour of bearded fat men everywhere is on the line.
Rick Rude vs. Keith Lee
Newcomer Keith Lee has won many fans over with his larger than life presence and charisma. Rick Rude however, finds Lee to be merely larger than large. During one of his trademark pre-match verbal assaults Rude began comparing the typical inner city sweathog to Keith Lee, prompting Lee to run to the ring. Rude insulted Lee further, commenting that he was too busy eating fried chicken and chicken wings to get the kind of body that could compete with the Ravishing One. Lee retorted that while he was in fact a fan of fried chicken, like any other red-blooded male, it was Rude who was walking around on little chicken legs. Since then crowds have been chanting “chicken legs” at Rude, despite his furious proclamations that this is an upper body business. A fuming Rude has challenged Lee to a pose down, a race and a pushup contest, with each event having been won by Lee. Upon Lee’s victories and the continued chants from the crowd Rude has snapped, prompting a final showdown to decide what a real wrestler looks like.
Intercontinental Championship Match*:Tully Blanchard (Champion, With Chris Nowinski) vs. Fit Finlay vs. Dr. Death Steve Williams vs. Gary Albright
Special Guest Referee: Bill Watts
*Blanchard must take the fall for the title to change hands
Tully Blanchard has long been claiming that he is suffering the effects of a serious concussion, often paradoxically wearing a neckbrace to the ring and refusing to defend his title. He has resisted attempts by Bill Watts to strip him of his title by bringing in concussion advocate and Harvard grad Chris Nowinski to argue that no one should have to lose status at work due to concussions and even threatening to sue due to his “unsafe work environment”. Attempts by Blanchard and Nowinski to have blows to the head banned, which Blanchard claims will allow the fans to enjoy Tully Blanchard’s wrestling for as long as possible, have fallen on deaf ears after Tully delivered a piledriver on the cold concrete to Finlay in a previous match, in which head blows were banned, to retain his belt via disqualification. Watts has now scheduled a four-way title match, blows to the head allowed, with the stipulation that the title can only change hands if Blanchard himself is pinned.
Live Stream Update on Angelo Poffo’s health
“The Miser” Angelo Poffo has been laid up for weeks since his brutal beating at the hands of Cactus Jack. He joins us from his bed at the Sisters of Saint Martha convent to update us on the status of his health.
Women’s Championship Match*: Toni Storm (With The Prince of Wrestling) vs. Aja Kong
*If Aja Kong wins, she gets three minutes alone in the ring with The Prince of Wrestling
The Prince of Wrestling has been near the top of women’s division since its debut several months ago. His young protégé Toni Storm has been the beneficiary of the Prince’s antics as he has provided ample distractions for her to capitalized on during her matches. This recipe for success has proved ineffective against the rather rotund, bi-racial Aja Kong however, as the women’s champion has thus far ignored the Prince’s vulgar jabs and instead focused on brutalizing Storm as the Prince flees. With Storm and the Prince desperate to have the gold around the Prince’s waist but with Kong having nothing to prove, Bill Watts has stepped in and added the stipulation that while Storm gets a title shot, Kong gets three minutes alone in the ring with the Prince should she prove victorious. Perhaps the public will finally find out if the Prince does EVERYTHING as well as he claims.
Roman Reigns (With Tammy Sytch) vs. Ricky Steamboat
JackSlater Promotions’ brilliant bombshell, Tammy Sytch, is used to getting what she wants. After taking her protégé Mike Awesome to the cusp of the main event, Ms. Sytch was shocked to see him defeated by the ultimate everyman, Ricky Steamboat. Steamboat caught the vixen’s eye, though her attempts to seduce him, through propositions both business based and otherwise, failed. Enraged, the proud Ms. Sytch called upon her daddy for the money to hire Roman Reigns, who long ago stopped trying to appease fans and now works for whoever pays up. After a series of increasingly brutal attacks by Reigns, particularly one that left Steamboat bloody in front of his son and wife at May Day Massacre, wrestling’s ultimate family man has partially given in to Ms. Sytch’s demands and agreed to share the ring, if not the bed, with her as he confronts Reigns. Ms. Sytch remains confident that with Reigns as her shield, she will soon have Steamboat as the sword to her sheath.
Tex Ferguson & Chad 2 Badd vs. The Murdoch Boys (Dick Murdoch and Trevor Murdoch)
* Winner gets the baby blue Camaro
Good friends and better enemies, Tex Ferguson and Chad 2 Badd have reunited for a common goal – saving
Tex’s beautiful baby blue Camaro, replete with a 350 under the hood and dual exhaust, from the clutches of The Murdoch Boys, Dick and Trevor. While the two former compadres had been engaged in a blood feud over the affections of Susie, neither could stand to see what was happening to the car in which they had each become very good friends with Susie for the first time. With the Murdochs taking Tex’s blue baby out muddin, having the confederate flag painted on it, and shooting antique cans off the hood, the boys from Southpaw have had just about all that they can take.
Kenta Kobashi vs. Tomohiro Ishii
Tomohiro Ishii has long looked up to Kenta Kobashi, quietly dreaming of one day facing off against the legend despite being far lower in the company hierarchy. In a rare interview, Ishii revealed that he always dreamed of facing Kobashi and being the first man to kick out of his famous Burning Hammer, which has been used only seven times ever. Shortly after Summerfest XX-8 Ishii challenged Kobashi, only for the legend to politely refuse. In response Ishii began running roughshod over the middle of the card and established a long winning streak. Challenging Kobashi again, Ishii was tersely told that he was too small to fight. An enraged Ishii began observing Kobashi’s matches from ringside and even attacking Kobashi’s opponents before they reached the ring, incensing the legend. Ishii has claimed that he needs to face Kobashi in order to have a respectable career and that if he merely receives the Burning Hammer, even without kicking out, it will be enough to allow him to retire with honour. Kobashi has finally relented but warned Ishii that he is playing with fire and is asking to be burned.
Best 2/3 Falls Heavyweight Championship Match: Macho Man Randy Savage (Champion, With Miss Elizabeth) vs. Mick Foley
Macho Man Randy Savage has long reigned as heavyweight champion and face of JackSlater Promotions. Things took a slight turn however after Miss Elizabeth, ever sympathetic, tended to a severely wounded Mankind after his brutal May Day Massacre match vs Kenta Kobashi. Mankind grew infatuated with Miss Elizabeth, drawing the ire of a jealous Savage and eliciting multiple beatings as he showed up at Savage matches armed with dull roses. Savage was further flummoxed when Dude Love began appearing at his matches, and even in his locker room, professing his admiration for Savage and how Savage was what every cool cat aspired to be. This further infuriated Savage and even caused him to lose matches via disqualification due to interference via Mankind or Dude Love and countouts. Following a blowup where Savage left Mankind/Dude Love as a bloody pulp, Cactus Jack emerged. Cactus was a fan of neither Elizabeth nor Savage and claimed that he was there to protect Mankind and Dude Love, whose crimes were merely “loving” Savage and his wife. After brutalizing Savage repeatedly, hospitalizing Angelo Poffo and seemingly leaving Miss Elizabeth injured backstage, Cactus became Savage’s target. Fans have been torn between supporting the sympathetic Mankind along with the humourous Dude Love and jeering the brutal Cactus Jack. Attempts to challenge Cactus Jack saw Dude Love or Mankind emerge in his place, enraging Savage who accused Cactus Jack, the only personality Savage claims is really there, of playing games in an attempt to distract him and eventually take the title. It has been decided that Savage will take on Mankind/Dude Love/Cactus Jack in a best 2/3 falls match, with Macho vowing to make Cactus Jack, in particular, pay
Touche, my friend. Touche!
