Happy Birthday

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Jiminy Cricket

#TeamMeat
Mar 9, 2014
2,168
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My Name is Jame`s Cricket `n` I`m 99 year`s Young 2day. :hbday: My Great Grandchildren Don`t visit me in the Hospital anymore, But the Joke`s on them Because I Cut them out of my Will. :biglaugh: I may be Semile, But I still know how 2 call an Lawyer. :biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh: I`m literally Rich `n` they Don`t even work, So Happy Birthday Kid`s, good Luck when I`m gone!!! :biglaugh::handclap::yo:
 

Jiminy Cricket

#TeamMeat
Mar 9, 2014
2,168
2,107
My Buddy Walter turn`s 99 Year`s old Today. I Have a Little Competition Goin`g with Walter 2 see who Can live longer. I Will Definitely Live Longer then Walter because Walter has Multiple Health problem`s Including Diabeetus, `n` I haven`t even Sneeze`d in 40 Year`s. :laugh::laugh::laugh: On Top of that Walter is a Idiot because He`s an World War 2 Vet `n` I Jus`t Dodge`d the Draf`t Because I`m not fighting in An war. :laugh: There is No way Walter will live longer then me, Walter has an Condition known as Lung spur`s that make`s it harder 2 Breathe, Bye Bye Walter. :biglaugh::yo::handclap:
 
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Jiminy Cricket

#TeamMeat
Mar 9, 2014
2,168
2,107
Great New`s everyone. My Buddy Walter Finally Pass`d Away. Meanin`g i Won the Competition 2 see who could Live longer. So Now Walter is burnin`g in Heck, `n` I Just Robbed his Estate because there was No One Home. :laugh: Bye Bye, Walter!!! :biglaugh::clap::handclap:
 

Jiminy Cricket

#TeamMeat
Mar 9, 2014
2,168
2,107
My Name is Jame`s Cricket `n` I`m 99 year`s Young 2day. :hbday: My Great Grandchildren Don`t visit me in the Hospital anymore, But the Joke`s on them Because I Cut them out of my Will. :biglaugh: I may be Semile, But I still know how 2 call an Lawyer. :biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh: I`m literally Rich `n` they Don`t even work, So Happy Birthday Kid`s, good Luck when I`m gone!!! :biglaugh::handclap::yo:
My GrandKid`s aren`t getting a Dime. :laugh: I Have $3.5 Million Dollar`s in the Bank, I Will pass away any Second now. :laugh: But I`m s`pending as much as I Can, the Rest will go to Wal-Mart. That`s rite, I Set up Walmart as the Main Bemeficiary in my Will. So my Grandkid`s won`t get anything, Support your Local Wal-Mart. :biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh:
 

Jiminy Cricket

#TeamMeat
Mar 9, 2014
2,168
2,107
I`m 99 Year`s young Today. `n` That`s Great New`s. Because AppleBee`s is runnin`g an special Where every time u Turn 99, U Get a Free apple Sunday. So my Daughter Viviana de la Rosa is takin`g me 2 AppleBee`s 2 get a free Sunday. :cheers:

SIDE NOTE: MY SON JERRY IS 75 YEAR`S OLD AND HAS NEVER HAD A JOB. SO I`M KICKIN`G HIM OUT OF THE APARTMENT 2DAY, `N` HE`S NOT COMING 2 APPLEBEE`S EITHER. GOOD LUCK OUT THERE, JERRY. :biglaugh:
 

Jiminy Cricket

#TeamMeat
Mar 9, 2014
2,168
2,107
I Had a Great Time with my Son Jerry at AppleBee`s last Nite. A Father-Son Trip to AppleBee`s. Afterward`s, I Kick`d him out of the Apartment. He Didn`t Know Wat Hit Him. :biglaugh: He Couldn`t Believe it at First until I Call`d the Cop`s 2 remove him from the Premise`s. He Told me he had Nowhere 2 stay, Not my Problem. :biglaugh: No Idea where Jerry Went last nite `n` I Don`t care. I`ve Alway`s hate`d Jerry. :yo:
 

Jiminy Cricket

#TeamMeat
Mar 9, 2014
2,168
2,107
Where did the Year`s go. We`re already in the Year 2020. I Rember back when it was 1999, i Thought, Wow, that`s so many Year`s. `n` now Here we are again Already. `n` Before u Know it, We`ll have another new Year comin`g up. It`s Umbelievable how these Year`s fly by. U Just flip U`re Calender `n` it`s Gone. :amazed: That`s how the Earth is Milliom`s of year`s old, That wouldn`t happen if they Move`d Slowly. :biglaugh: Pretty soon I`ll be a Million. :biglaugh: Wow. :amazed:
 

Jiminy Cricket

#TeamMeat
Mar 9, 2014
2,168
2,107
I Got a Call from my Son Jerry. He`s in Prison because he Had no place 2 Stay. So He was Beggin`g me for money So he could buy some Snack`s like Cheeto`s, Oreo`s, Dorito`s, u name it. So I Said no Problem, I Got u Bro. :biglaugh: But I Didn`t send him any Money, I Just Want`d 2 Keep him on the Line 2 run up his Fone bill. :biglaugh::yo::handclap: My Son Jerry has Multiple Disease`s `n` Can`t even buy Cheeto`s now. :biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh: `n` MeanWhile I`m Dinin`g out at AppleBee`s every nite, Livin`g it up. :yo: Maybe Jared Fogleman can hook u up with Some SambWitch`s in Jail, Jerry. :biglaugh::handclap::biglaugh::yo::biglaugh::handclap::biglaugh::yo:
 
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