Hockey mom wants daughter allowed in boys' change room

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Roughneck

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Oct 15, 2003
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Hockey chicks are different from normal girls, they can handle what goes on in a guys locker room, if they can't then they shouldn't be playing guys hockey. I've never seen any problems with girls in our locker room before, and none of my friends have either.

In fact, from my experience, most girls that play on guys teams when they're away from the rink have a problem with being "one of the guys" because of the team attitude.

But I say let the team decide, afterall, its about them, if they do vote to keep her out, then she should leave the team because they clearly don't see her as part of it, and thats no fun for anyone.
 

Hyack57

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Aug 6, 2004
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Yeah but I wonder how well it would go over if the situations were reversed? If a guy was pushing to be able to be allowed in the same change room as women. LOL. It would never fly.
 

badtakemachine

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Dec 20, 2002
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You want boys and girls in the same dressing room? Fine. 2 words.

Under Armour.

As for showering after the game, depending on the arena, a situation won't be too hard to figure out. My arena has the showers for dressing rooms 1/2 connected as well as 3/4. In that case, since 2 dressing rooms are empty at the time of the shower because the other teams are on the ice, the females and males could use the showers for the other dressing room. Is that too hard?
 

CornKicker

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Feb 18, 2005
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I thought 85% of female hockey players were lesbians anyway so they are probably all talking about the same thing. I see no problem with sharing :dunno:
 

Bruins4Ever

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Sep 12, 2004
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I'm for no on this one. Sure, I'm 16 a yes, girls are very interesting, very interesting. But the problem I have with it is that I know a lot of ass hole friends. Put a girl in there, and suddenly she's being harassed. I personally wouldn't be an ass, but that's just how i was brought up. I don't smoke, do drugs, etc. so I'm pretty grounded for the most part. The problem is that at the age of the girl (14) all the guys are starting to notice her develop. It can only lead to problems with the coaches having to punish the players, and the girls parents getting involved. It just doesn't seem like it's worth all the trouble IMO. It's not really fair though, guys can't be on girls teams or go in girls dressing rooms, but it's ok if it's the opposite. If this goes through court and the girls family wins, it's going to create a huge mess for every other mens or womens league allowing the opposite sex in, and allowing them to be in the same changing room. Too much trouble for what it's worth IMO.
 

kingsfan

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Mar 18, 2002
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On a personal level, I would have an issue with it, since I was a 14-year-old boy once and I know that if a girl was changing in the stall next to me, shorts and t-shirt or not, I'd be looking. I wouldn't say any wise ass comments or whatever, unless the girl could take it and dish it out just as well, but I know that likely, that girl, or girls, would become eye candy to a collect of about 20 mid-teen boys. Guys in high school/university likely can handle it better, for maturity and other reasons, but a 14-year-old boys 'curiousity' isn't a good thing to have in this situation.

That said, there have been a number of a women on this thread that have said they have been on men's teams for years and that it hasn't been an issue and I have no personal experience myself with girls on the same team as me, so I'll go along with it. If those that have lived through it have no complaints, on the whole, why should I?

I will still say no to the idea though on the matter of principal. If a guy can't be on a girls team and change in a girls locker room, it shouldn't be perfectly fine the other way around. Unless their is a clear lack of women hockey programs in a given area, women should not be allowed on men's teams and, therefore, not allowed to change in men's locker rooms.
 

Big Phil

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Nov 2, 2003
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I have alot to say about this one here. First off this will enrage a lot of people what I am about to say. But it is as true as it is rude. MOST female hockey players are not attractive. How many of us consider Haley Wickenheiser to be hot? Not me. I'll bet more of you would be scared to see her down a dark alley alone. So right there that's half your problem eliminated.

But to all the girls out there I got a message for you. If you played Hockey before and had no problem changing in front of guys then the sad truth is that you must not be eye candy by any means. Sorry. If you looked like Jessica Simpson then there would be a big rift in the dressing room. One guy would be trying to pick her up, and another would fight over her and so on. And why not they just saw her naked, that's half the battle there. And I'm talking ADULTS here too.

Now as for a 14 year old, what mother in her right mind wants her daughter's dignity to be on display in front of 20 boys? I remember exactly what I was thinking at 13-14 years old. It was girls! All the time. And like any other boy I dreamnt of peeking into the changing rooms at school during Gym class. Let's face it at that age you are immature, bad, bad things can happen if you put a naked 14 year old girl with 20 naked boys. Not a good ice breaker. A recipe for disaster.

Now to all the guys who thought this was okay picture this: If you are a man then you think the same as me. Therefore you may be awkward, excited or even embarassd in this situation. But be honest, when the girls back is turned every guy on the team is talking about her body parts. Its true. We as men know we'll do that. So knowing that, how would you feel if your mother, or daughter was changing in front of those guys? Or worse yet your wife or girlfriend? I wouldn't allow my girlfriend within 100 yards of there. Why? Cause men think dirty things like that. Do we admit that to women even if they are changng beside us? No way, but when they are out of the room we do a 180 turn. I'm an adult and I say that, now picture 14 year olds! If I'm wrong then reply to me!
 

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Dynamix said:
You want boys and girls in the same dressing room? Fine. 2 words.

Under Armour.

As for showering after the game, depending on the arena, a situation won't be too hard to figure out. My arena has the showers for dressing rooms 1/2 connected as well as 3/4. In that case, since 2 dressing rooms are empty at the time of the shower because the other teams are on the ice, the females and males could use the showers for the other dressing room. Is that too hard?

Not many teams would want to leave their dressing rooms unlocked while on the ice. I know I wouldn't let players from another team shower in my team's room.

The girls who think they should be allowed to change with the guys are forgetting the biggest issue: liability.

As already mentioned, while you might not care if you see a guy's package while he quickly drops his boxers and puts on some hockey underwear, 95% of the world sees a problem with that. (Also, depending on what you wear under your gear, if any of the guys get a glimpse of your chest, you know you're going to hear about it.) If something does happen, the governing association, the coach (me), parents of any guilty boys, and likely the girl's parents as well, are all liable for whatever abuse might take place. No way will I ever take that risk.

In the refs room, our options are limited. Therefore it becomes somewhat of a circus when we call a game with a female official on the crew. Official rules say the male officials must be out of the room when the female is changing, and then she must leave when we go to change. That said, there is usually only one female with two guys calling the game, so she'll usually just go into the bathroom stall to change, and we'll quickly change at the same time.
 

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Big Phil said:
I have alot to say about this one here. First off this will enrage a lot of people what I am about to say. But it is as true as it is rude. MOST female hockey players are not attractive. How many of us consider Haley Wickenheiser to be hot? Not me. I'll bet more of you would be scared to see her down a dark alley alone. So right there that's half your problem eliminated.

If you know hockey players, you'd know that what girls look like usually doesn't matter to them when their minds are in the gutter. You should see some of the girls who hang out at hockey rinks (we call them "pucks"). Not all of them are appealing to the eye.
 

DisgruntledHawkFan

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Not a chance in hell. In the ideal world this would work, but the world is far from ideal. A guy with 5 of his buddies playing x-box is a totally different person from the guy taking his girl on a date. The liability would be far too complicated, and I believe the team would suffer as a whole. The comment about the girl having a family member in there with you, I sure as hell wouldn't be comfortable changing in the same room as my sister/daughter/niece/whatever. This is just to messy with way to much grey area involved for me.
 

badtakemachine

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Dec 20, 2002
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Van said:
Not many teams would want to leave their dressing rooms unlocked while on the ice. I know I wouldn't let players from another team shower in my team's room.

Sorry, I didn't explain it well, the access to the showers for the room is cut off from the actual other room,the lock is from the inside. This is meant for that situation.

Van said:
If you know hockey players, you'd know that what girls look like usually doesn't matter to them when their minds are in the gutter. You should see some of the girls who hang out at hockey rinks (we call them "pucks"). Not all of them are appealing to the eye.

:lol: It's so true.
 

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oilers144 said:
im all for it if the girl on ur team is hot i dont think watching her shower would be a bad thing lol

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Exhibit A.
 

McDonald19

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Sep 9, 2003
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Seperate locker rooms for under 18...after that if adult teams want to have co-ed locker rooms thats fine.

If I had a 13 year old daughter on a boys team I'd do everything I could to make sure she wasn't in the same locker room as her male teammates.

Just asking for trouble when you put a couple of teenage girls in a locker room with 10-20 teenage boys.
 

RedK

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canadahockeygirl said:
But a bigger reason I play with men is that I hate the BS that goes on with womens teams. Womens' hockey SUCKS-- at my age, there are very few non-beginner D-level recreation teams, and when you get a player that thinks she's cool because she just figured out how to lift a puck at 27, the ego is unrealistic. It makes it hard to play also when your captains are dating (my HS girls team had that happen, and in college it happened as well) or when you have a meltdown because girls are catty. Even at 45 years old, they're still going at it. I've never experienced that with any of the boys or mens teams I've been on. You go in the locker room, shoot the ****, go out and play, come back to the locker room, shoot more ****, get a few beers, then go on your way.

If a guy really wants to dumb down his game and play womens' hockey, more power to him. It's not the same game as mens' hockey. Granted the goal is the same, but a lot of people enjoy the physical aspect of the mens rules.

:eek: Oh my god, we obviously have 'tended for the same women's teams! :) I play for competition, not melodrama. I like my intensity on the ice, not in the politics off it. I like hard shots, fast skating and complex plays. I much prefer playing with the guys.
 

Sammy*

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Backin72 said:
Stand back fella, never said it was a one way street, unless you'd like to point that out to me. :shakehead

Don't make assumptions.
Oh sorry. Its not a one way world.
But you of course believe that 1 persons wants should over-ride everbody elses?
And I take it you think its ok if the situations were reversed?
 

Backin72

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Jul 9, 2004
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Sammy said:
But you of course believe that 1 persons wants should over-ride everbody elses?

Huh? Where in that article did it say that everybody else was against it? I believe the opposite is true.
Ms. Emlyn said most of the youngsters on the team say they're fine with mixed changing rooms, but she has received several anonymous e-mails condemning her petition.

Sammy said:
And I take it you think its ok if the situations were reversed?

yup.
 

Sammy*

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Backin72 said:
Huh? Where in that article did it say that everybody else was against it? I believe the opposite is true.

I took your comment of "If the female wants to be with the males, so be it. . " as to be more of a general comment in terms of if she wants something, she should be entitled to it. Mea culpa.
I am frankly betwixed & between. If most of the kids/parents are ok with it, one part of me thinks it should be ok. But the other part of me just has this very basic response that it shouldnt happen, cause of the obvious boy/girl reasons as well as the impact it may have on a dressing room.
I dunno.
And oh, btw, I dont for a moment think if the situations were reversed that people would be near as liberal as they appear to be on this issue.
 

Ogopogo*

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This hockey mom is absolutely off her nut. The title of this thread should be "Hockey mom wants daughter to be r a p e d" I am NOT saying that thes boys would do that but why in the hell would you put your half naked 14 year old daughter in a room with 3/4 naked 14 year old boys? Nothing good can come from it. The extra comraderie and coaching will be more than offset by the improper situation that everyone is in. Why do we have separate men's and women's bathrooms in society? It ain't proper for opposite sexes to get dressed together.

This mom needs serious help.
 

ChrisKreider20

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Jul 21, 2004
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Let her in but pretty soon the mom will want her out when the boys start ogling at her breasts. I had a girl on my team a 3 yrs ago actually at the same age 14...she didn't feel confortable in the guys change room cuz frankly we'd all be staring at her and she wanted her privacy. If she really wants let her in but I can guarantee with in 2 days she'll want out. :)
 

cjbhab*

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oilers144 said:
im all for it if the girl on ur team is hot i dont think watching her shower would be a bad thing lol

I agree man, you hit this one dead on!
 

canadahockeygirl*

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sevenSteen said:
Sex jokes are pretty much bound to happen in any situation in a guys locker room. It's the more "amusing" stuff that makes me wonder why a girl would want to share a locker room with a bunch of guys. Have you ever had a guy in your locker room wave his dick at you? If you haven't, I'd say you're pretty lucky as the guys probably don't feel comfortable to do it in front of you. But stuff like that (and much worse) happens all the time in male locker rooms on a lot of teams.

I know what goes on in locker rooms. Actually, if you went back to one of my first posts here, you'd see that I mentioned that the only difference playing mens hockey now and boys hockey then is that the older guys no longer wave their dicks in my face. I was very much part of the locker room fun. While I didn't have a dick to hang in some of the guys' faces, I did get a chance to suffocate them with sweaty boobs. :) But those were also the guys that I grew up with that I looked at as brothers-- never dated them, slept over their houses and nothing sexual would happen (I think the closest I ever got to hooking up with one of them was spin the bottle)-- you just don't cross that line with teammates. Male or female.

However, on the flip side, I usually take into account that some guys are uncomfortable with a chick in the locker room and know where to draw the line. I don't change facing them (this gives them and me privacy), put a towel around my waist, stuff like that. Yeah, I'll sit there in a sports bra and my shorts, but I don't get stark naked and will shower at home OR when the guys aren't going in there. But I was never a strip down so everyone can see my ass type of girl.

I have a lot of female friends who play hockey on guys teams and they're always the butt-end of jokes, no matter what. One of my friends was forced to change in the guys locker room because of the lack of another usable locker room to use prior to a game, and she was almost rap-ed by one of her teammates before someone called the coach.

Almost being ***** by her teammates is clear stupidity on their part and I don't think it's the norm. I'm sorry she had to go through that though.

My team nickname when I was a teenager was "****". There was also a kid named "tripod" and one nicknamed "DSL". We used to joke all the time about stuff like that, and to be honest, I never felt like any of it crossed the line since it was equally distributed. They respected me because I could play and because I would assert myself when they were out of line.

I don't have anything against girls playing on men's teams if they're good enough. I just don't understand why they would deal with the "jokes" they would face, regardless of how much they love competition. Women being allowed to share a locker room with guys IMHO should never be allowed unless the girl knows all of the guys on the team very well, and it would be better if she also had a brother or a member of her family on the team.

I understand where you're coming from, but as you get older the locker room changes.

I never considered it dealing with the jokes because I got just as much a kick out of them as the guys did, and gave it back equally. I realized what could happen in a locker room and made sure it didn't. Don't get me wrong, I have had my troubles with mens teams, but the few issues I've had haven't outweighed the fun and wouldn't stop me from playing with other guys in the future.

However, I have had a few relationships break apart because the guys were too insecure with my being in a locker room with other men. Everyone has this image of locker room gang bangs and stuff like that, but it's not the case everywhere. Some people are out to play, not score a piece of meat.

Good stuff though. It's nice to see the other side of things.
 

CornKicker

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Feb 18, 2005
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sevenSteen said:
More like 5-7% at the most

It could definetly be that way in europe or overseas but I know for a fact that 17 of 23 girls on my local college team were lesbians. They are very open and honest about it and a friend of mine (one of the 6 not lesbians) said they were very crude and nasty. And just when dudes think "yes hot lesbians" you are quickly assured that these are not of the hot variety but the " Hey is that your little brother? Ohhh my bad, thats Suzy from the hockey team" "when did she shave a buzz cut and start wearing army pants" :thumbd:
 
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