Anxiety affecting my game

[FlyChicaga]

This is a bit of an awkward post to make, but I do need some advice since my game is somewhat falling apart.

I suffer from social anxiety. It's something I've dealt with my whole life, but in terms of hockey wasn't really an issue since I've been playing pick-up games for years. In the past two years I joined two beer league teams, and I've found my anxiety is really hurting my play.

Basically, starting in warmups my anxiety builds, which is a fear of screwing up. I fear turning the puck over, making bad plays, having the team look down upon me, etc., so when I do get the puck I end up freaking out and panicking. I have the skill to skate, make solid passes, and make accurate, hard shots. In a game, I do none of those things.

Example: As a defenseman, I'll make a really solid D play and strip a guy of the puck. I pick it up in the corner and freak out thinking this guy is going to strip it back, I'm going to make a bad pass, I'm going to turn it over, etc., so I throw it off the glass into the neutral zone. If I could calm down and make some space, two guys would be open and I'd make a solid breakout pass.

Second example: In warm ups, I'll hang in the neutral zone and practice escape maneuvers followed by a pass, or I'll practice lateral moves along the blue line to make space for a point shot. I'll be making these great moves and hard passes, then in a game I get the puck at the line with plenty of time to move and my muscles freeze and I feel like a bender. Or I tense up and end up shooting 3 feet wide of the net.

Has anyone ever suffered from something like this, and any advice to overcome it?

Click to read more...

 

[HansonBro]

Have you seen a doctor regarding the anxiety? If not, that may be a wise place to start. Explain everything as best yòu can and come fully prepared so that you are able to articulate yourself and situation to him/her.

As a bro...hockey should be your outlet from life

Best of luck

 

[MarkusNaslund19]

I know the feeling exactly. When I was younger I put a tremendous pressure on myself as a hockey player. It really stripped the fun from me.

It might be worth it to try to take a step back from it emotionally.
In the last few years I have become a much better player by discarding my fears and just saying 'f*** it'.

It you have that attitude, you will actually be a better player in the long run.

I still outwork most players, but I don't sweat it when I make mistakes. As such, I have scored some big goals and made some big plays that I never would have even attempted a few years ago.

To be honest, as a teammate, as long as you learn from your mistakes I would much rather have a teammate who makes the odd mistake than one who is clearly afraid of the puck.

Do your best man. It's all they can ask from you.

 

[puckpilot]

I have a tendency to be a perfectionist and when I was younger, I was very self conscious. I could not accept anything but perfection in anything I did, Hockey among them. These are things I still deal with, but as I got older and I gained a little wisdom, a little perspective, and started to run out of Fks to give at things that don't really matter in the big picture.

I've been on many teams. Nobody is perfect. Everyone makes mistakes. That's an integral part of the game. Sometimes those mistakes are small. Other times' they're big. I've learned to accept that from myself and my team mates. Because once you step off the ice, it doesn't really matter anymore.

Big mistake or big glory, with time, they all turn into stories you and your buddies laugh at over a beverage. To me the only thing I get pissed off at is when someone is being lazy. That's the one thing everyone can control. You can't control if you've got two left feet and stone hands that night, but you can control effort.

If a mistake happens, and it ends up in the net, try and learn and do better next time. Otherwise just relax, take a deep breath, and play the game and don't over think things. Just keep it simple and make the plays you know you can make.

What's the worse that can happen? You screw up and lose the game. So what? You got play hockey. A lot of people don't get to do that for many different reasons. But regardless, the sun will come up, and world won't end just because you made a mistake.

For me, I find it helps to keep those things in mind when I get nervous, or when I get too down on myself when I'm not playing well.

Hope there's something there you can use.

Cheers.

 

[leftwinger37]

This was a problem for me into my early 20s. Being inside my own head so much inhibited my growth as a hockey player. I was a solid, reliable player but I could have been more than I was because I was too conservative for fear of making mistakes. I'll echo what others have said that age, experience, and perspective were what helped me get past it, but another thing that really really helped was a book called "Hockey Tough" by Dr. Saul Miller. I have plugged that book several times on these boards and I will continue to because it honestly changed my life. It helped give me the tools to focus on the positives of my game when I would fall into that negative headspace.

Getting away from competitive hockey for a couple years and just playing drop in and reinforcing my skills at stick and puck was the best thing that has happened to me as a hockey player. Besides helping reignite my passion for the game, when I went back to playing in leagues, I had a new found appreciation for what I bring to the table and trusted myself in more situations.

Exposure therapy may be the only way to get over the anxiety. Find a pick up skate and just play. I know for you this is easier said than done, but the stakes could not be any lower than a drop in skate. If you make a mistake, it will never show up on the scoreboard. I'm sure social anxiety and OCD would probably make it tough on you finding a new group of people to play with to expose all of your warts to, but at the same time, the thing guys at these skates appreciate most is your hustle/effort level. I think if you're "bringing it," you will be pleasantly surprised at how accepting they will be. Make a pros and cons list to track your progress. Recognize yourself for the things you do right, no matter how simple, and approach the negatives as something to be improved upon and not an insurmountable obstacle. Most importantly, if you're putting these thoughts to paper (or a screen), you can be honest/critical of yourself without blowing the negatives out of proportion. Seeing the positives next to the negatives can help balance you out.

This is a complex issue but I think that being aware of the problem is the first step to correcting it. You just have to find your process and stick with it. I wish you the best of luck!

 

[Neutrinos]

I think the first step to overcoming the issue is to identify the root and cause of the anxiety

And since the issue is in your head, that's a good place to go looking for answers

I'd recommend some relaxing music, a few scented candles and about 3 grams of magic mushrooms

 

[gosinger]

I just re-activated my account to post the same book recommendation as leftwinger37, "Hockey Tough" is a great book on sports psychology with focus on hockey. It helped me to get into the correct frame of mind before a game, and more importantly to get back there during a game if something went bad. An absolute recommendation on my end.

 

[Goonzilla]

I don't think I'm quite in the same boat, but I'm a different player at pick up than I am in league play; and the pick up is usually with a much higher standard of player than the league play.

I'm pretty fit, and don't take long shifts, but I find myself tiring in league games and expending an inordinate amount of energy, some of it nervous and some of it having to cover ground (or ice) and try and make plays I just don't have to do when I've got much better players around me (at pick up).

Some of it too is the warm ups, or lack of. The league stuff gets a couple of minutes and it's game on, pick up there's always more time to warm up, zero in a few shots and get a feel for the puck.

It might be that I'm holding the stick a little too tight in league play or trying too hard, but the league play gets frustrating, though it might also be to do with the other guys playing, when you feed someone wide open in front who then misses the open net.

I'm always trying to make play for other people there, when I should probably be a bit more selfish..just shoot more.

 

[FlyChicaga]

Thank you for the replies all. I forgot I had "Hockey Tough" on my bookshelf from several years ago. I dusted it off and started reading it today.

I also am quite a different player in pick-up versus beer league games. There is little pressure to perform in pick-up, and I play with some pretty outstanding players at one of the local rinks. Playing D, I can do many things that I don't try in a beer league game, even when the pick-up game is twice as fast due to skill level. I play the point much more aggressively in the offensive zone, and I'm not afraid to rush the puck if an outlet pass isn't available. In a game I always play really conservative and don't take any chances at all for fear of getting burned.

 

[Alexander the Gr8]

When I was younger, I used to be a bit nervous ahead of big games. Here's what my coach told me back then: "Hockey is where you should let yourself go. As soon as you step inside the rink, forget everything that's going on outside of it. Forget about the exam you bombed, forget about anything that worries you. Enjoy the moment, because playing hockey should be the most enjoyable part of your day."

I followed his advice, and I thought that I could only escape reality and responsibilities while at the rink. I ceased to think about my problems outside of the rink, just for the two hours I would spend there, whether it was stick and puck, a practice, a regular season game or a championship final.

I wish you the best. Hockey is the best game ever invented, enjoy every second of it. This feeling of enjoyment is only surpassed by eating a good meal or being with your loved ones.

 

[MalkinsPierogi]

Have you seen a doctor regarding the anxiety? If not, that may be a wise place to start. Explain everything as best yòu can and come fully prepared so that you are able to articulate yourself and situation to him/her.

As a bro...hockey should be your outlet from life

Best of luck

Telling this guy to see a doctor over hockey anxiety is what's wrong with the world today. Everyone gets anxious about things. You think Steve Jobs didn't get anxious before releasing a new Apple product? You think that Sidney Crosby didn't get anxious before game 7 of the 2009 Stanley Cup Finals? Everyone gets anxiety. Everyone deals with OCD in their own way. I felt the same way you did when I was 13 and starting the transition to ice hockey. You'll be fine. Next time you catch yourself with the puck and panicking, make the play that you're afraid to make. Do it anyways. If you make a mistake, that's a GOOD thing. Everyone makes mistakes. If you don't make mistakes you'll never test your limits and learn what types of plays you're capable of actually pulling off! It's beer league. Have fun and don't stress yourself out. It's much better to try this than to go get a prescription for a problem that every person on the planet deals with that could end up being a lifelong addiction.

Be strong, go out, make some really bad plays so you get used to the fact that mistakes are going to happen, and eventually you'll be over your hockey anxiety!

 

[HansonBro]

Telling this guy to see a doctor over hockey anxiety is what's wrong with the world today. Everyone gets anxious about things. You think Steve Jobs didn't get anxious before releasing a new Apple product? You think that Sidney Crosby didn't get anxious before game 7 of the 2009 Stanley Cup Finals? Everyone gets anxiety. Everyone deals with OCD in their own way. I felt the same way you did when I was 13 and starting the transition to ice hockey. You'll be fine. Next time you catch yourself with the puck and panicking, make the play that you're afraid to make. Do it anyways. If you make a mistake, that's a GOOD thing. Everyone makes mistakes. If you don't make mistakes you'll never test your limits and learn what types of plays you're capable of actually pulling off! It's beer league. Have fun and don't stress yourself out. It's much better to try this than to go get a prescription for a problem that every person on the planet deals with that could end up being a lifelong addiction.

Be strong, go out, make some really bad plays so you get used to the fact that mistakes are going to happen, and eventually you'll be over your hockey anxiety!

Hm... the "cheer up buttercup", "just get over it" theory. Nice.

To your point though, trial and error/reinforcement can deffinatly be effective.

On the flip side he described it as social anxiety disorder and OCD. Not hockey anxiety. His true anxiety from his every day life is carrying over into hockey.

Anxiousness during a meaningless beer league game is just a symptom. I'm sure even you would describe it as excessive.

Now,
anxiety- a nervous disorder characterized by a state of excessive uneasiness and apprehension, typically with compulsive behavior or panic attacks.

Social anxiety- The fear of social situations that involve interaction with other people. You could say social anxiety is the fear and anxiety of being negatively judged and evaluated by other people. It is a pervasive disorder and causes anxiety and fear in most all areas of a person's life. It is chronic because it does not go away on its own.

Anyways, the point is that it's not cut and dry like you say it is. Social anxiety is very real and in fact the 3rd largest mental illness today.

It effects his everyday life. Himself, kids, family, work etc. But you'd know that because you took 10 minutes out of your life to actually talk to him....right?

My suggestion to see a doctor was about seeking help for the greater picture. A doctor (in Canada and a few other countries) is a free option to talk to someone QUALIFIED. This qualified person does not just hand out drugs. A doctor is connected with the knowledge, people and resources to set someone seeking help up properly.

I too suffer and the way I've dealt with it has been a long road. I guess we won't be talking to you come January 25

 

[Neutrinos]

In this day and age, the best thing might be to address the issue in the locker room with your teammates

Even if just a few of them are really supportive, it might help you relax during games

 

[lilphildub]

Telling this guy to see a doctor over hockey anxiety is what's wrong with the world today. Everyone gets anxious about things. You think Steve Jobs didn't get anxious before releasing a new Apple product? You think that Sidney Crosby didn't get anxious before game 7 of the 2009 Stanley Cup Finals? Everyone gets anxiety. Everyone deals with OCD in their own way. I felt the same way you did when I was 13 and starting the transition to ice hockey. You'll be fine. Next time you catch yourself with the puck and panicking, make the play that you're afraid to make. Do it anyways. If you make a mistake, that's a GOOD thing. Everyone makes mistakes. If you don't make mistakes you'll never test your limits and learn what types of plays you're capable of actually pulling off! It's beer league. Have fun and don't stress yourself out. It's much better to try this than to go get a prescription for a problem that every person on the planet deals with that could end up being a lifelong addiction.

Be strong, go out, make some really bad plays so you get used to the fact that mistakes are going to happen, and eventually you'll be over your hockey anxiety!

To an extent I agree. You don't go see a doctor just because you get nervous playing hockey. But IMO it sounds like there's more going into it. It sounds like other aspects of his life are affected by this anxiety also. It sounds like something similar to what I've experienced. I used to have anxiety off the ice and would try to deal with it on my own. Any time I was on the ice it was a relief and outlet to not have to worry about anything.

Then this past year the anxiety was taking out the joy of playing hockey because I couldn't focus on the game and my mind felt clouded. I'm the type that would usually keep to myself and "man up" "get over it". It eventually takes a toll on some people like myself and I couldn't even enjoy the things I truly loved to the full. It would cause more anxiety in my life if I wasn't happy with how I played that night. I was able to see a doctor and open up to some people about the things I struggle with. Its helped me to go back to enjoying the things I love again and has improved things off the ice also.

Going to see a doctor doesn't automatically make you weak or mean you need to take meds to take care of the issue. The doctor can help you with your anxiety and lead you in the direction you need to go. Maybe opening up to a professional will help who knows. But its definitely worth a try imo

 

[leftwinger37]

Thank you for the replies all. I forgot I had "Hockey Tough" on my bookshelf from several years ago. I dusted it off and started reading it today.

I also am quite a different player in pick-up versus beer league games. There is little pressure to perform in pick-up, and I play with some pretty outstanding players at one of the local rinks. Playing D, I can do many things that I don't try in a beer league game, even when the pick-up game is twice as fast due to skill level. I play the point much more aggressively in the offensive zone, and I'm not afraid to rush the puck if an outlet pass isn't available. In a game I always play really conservative and don't take any chances at all for fear of getting burned.

You talk about your play in pick-up vs. your play in league games like it’s two different people. It’s important for you to acknowledge that it’s all you. You are the player you want to be, the objective is figuring out how to be that player all of the time. When you get down to it, what is the difference between a pick-up game and a league game? Refs, a scorekeeper, and points in the standings. You still pay for pick-up. You still compete at pick-up. You still want to avoid letting your team down at pick-up. You still have beer afterward and BS with the guys at pick-up. So where does the pressure come from? I understand that nobody wants to make the mistake that costs your team, but if you don’t someone else will. You see that when they do, they are not publically stoned, shamed, humiliated, etc. and the sun still comes up the next day. You are in control of the pressure. You’re still finding out how to get a grip on it and in time you will. That book is a great start.

One of the first things I started doing to take control of my anxiety was getting into my preparation. I felt like if I obsessed about every little detail before arriving at the rink, getting dressed and stepping on the ice, I could just shut my mind off and play. The less I had to think about on the ice, the better. Any equipment tweaks, stick adjustments, even tape jobs are handled ahead of time. Another big thing for me is packing my bag the night before. If I pack everything up even a couple hours before I leave, I always feel like I’m forgetting something. I also started keeping my game day preparation the same, no matter what kind of game I’m playing. The meals are all the same, the rituals are all the same, the stretches are all the same, the warmups are all the same, etc. If you are following the same routines and are processing information the same way, your brain can sort of go on auto-pilot once you get the rink whether it’s pick-up or playoffs. Clearly, we all have our own bugaboos, so this may or may not be helpful to you. I’m just passing it along because managing the details has helped diminish the anxiety on game days.

Lastly, keep in mind that “it’s only beer league.” I don’t normally like to use that phrase; it’s generally said in a way that trivializes and/or marginalizes the level we play at. But at the end of the day, it’s still rec hockey and it’s not life or death. As others have said, hockey is the greatest game and it is meant to be enjoyed. Sometimes it’s easy to lose sight of that. Hopefully you'll find the tools you need to make it enjoyable again.

 

[BM14]

There's quite a bit of support for your struggles online and if your team is half decent at all, they'll be just as supportive. This is what true hockey players and teammates do.

As one poster quoted, hockey should be the best part of your day.

Another comment was "it's only beer league" and while I agree with the sentiment it's not applicable in this case as it appears to be more than simple anxiety. Equate it to him thinking of the simple beer league game as game 7 of the SC finals in OT and placing crushing pressure onto himself.

You have a lot of options as HansonBro mentioned. Talking about it online is a great first step and I'm sure all here commend you on that.

Try renting the ice (or if its too expensive, get a few friends and have them chip in to cover the cost) and just go have fun for an hour without the pressures of the game. Reinvigorate your passion for the sport which will hopefully slowly bring your confidence back.

 

[Mugzy97]

This is a bit of an awkward post to make, but I do need some advice since my game is somewhat falling apart.

Has anyone ever suffered from something like this, and any advice to overcome it?

Good on you for posting this.

I have struggled recently with anxiety/panic attacks on and off the ice, although mine has been different than yours. During hockey games I found that I was worrying something bad was going to happen to me healthwise. I felt that my health wasn't good enough when my heart rate was speeding and I was breathing heavy and was scared I was going to pass out or have a heart issue. It didn't make sense to me because I have always been active and healthy and played thousands of hockey games, but I started to be scared to play hockey and wasn't enjoying it at all, and when I did play, I wasn't going hard to keep my heart rate and breathing down to avoid the situation.

I have been working at this and trying to manage these feelings and I feel they are getting better over time and I am back to playing how I know I can without worrying so much. What has been working for me is instead of giving in to these attacks I have been challenging them, knowing that there is nothing wrong and that my body has been at peak performance many times before. Try not to focus on the negative thoughts. Whenever you have a negative thought just discard it and think of something positive and try to turn this into a habit. The other thing you need to do is have patience with it as you won't get better at managing it overnight, it will take some time, but you have to build up good habits and continuously work on them and over time it will get better and better. Seems to be working for me.

 

[jorbjorb]

I still get nervous here and there and I'm playing goddamn beer league lol. I always seem to play a bit better if I have a beer in the dressing room before the skate.

 

[FlyChicaga]

A little update...
I played pickup yesterday (I know, not beer league), and made a conscious effort to relax and take an extra second or two before making plays. Even if someone was able to strip me of the puck, I just said "do better next time around" and kept in the game. It was probably one of the best games--pickup or beer league--I've played in months. I was making solid passes, reading the offensive and defensive zone well, and had a couple nice goals. This was including a breakaway, where I usually think of all kinds of moves in my head, but instead just relaxed and read the goalie and scored.

I think it also helped that I changed things up a bit in terms of gear and getting ready. I mixed up my routine and felt great from the minute I got on the ice. So I'll try the same routine next men's league game, and we'll see how things go.

Thanks for the support and replies.

 

[Mugzy97]

A little update...
I played pickup yesterday (I know, not beer league), and made a conscious effort to relax and take an extra second or two before making plays. Even if someone was able to strip me of the puck, I just said "do better next time around" and kept in the game. It was probably one of the best games--pickup or beer league--I've played in months. I was making solid passes, reading the offensive and defensive zone well, and had a couple nice goals. This was including a breakaway, where I usually think of all kinds of moves in my head, but instead just relaxed and read the goalie and scored.

I think it also helped that I changed things up a bit in terms of gear and getting ready. I mixed up my routine and felt great from the minute I got on the ice. So I'll try the same routine next men's league game, and we'll see how things go.

Thanks for the support and replies.

Good stuff, just remember that it may take time to fix and won’t go away overnight. Keep doing what you’re doing and try to build up good habits. Be patient.

 

[StrictlyCommercial]

I think what you're describing is in part just confidence being down and anxiety exacerbating the issue. Taking a couple of seconds and trying to play smart is about all you can do. Hopefully you can then start making plays and building back up the confidence. I've gone from a goal a game to a point a game to 0.5 ppg the last 3 seasons. Lord knows, I'm also in dire need of a confidence boost to get my game back.

 

[MegaAlf]

With it being beer league hockey, you should be trying to win but not hard on yourself if you don't. It's not that serious. That's how I'd recommend approaching it. The guys that do take it too serious by fighting, dirty tactics, bad sportsmanship and so on should be ostracized.

I just got cussed out by a teammate for messing up a face off that cost us a goal. I made one mistake and I gotta listen to some clown throwing a fit. It really ruins the fun. How people compete says a lot about their character.

 

[thescrounger]

I have the same issue. The problem that's not really addressed here is that (for me anyway) what I have is an automatic physiological response. It is non-conscious, as I often tell myself "It's just beer league, calm down." This type of mental reassurance doesn't really work for me. Before the game my heart rate automatically goes up and my muscles in my arms and legs are tense -- NOT a great way to play hockey! In practice, I'm loose and skating and shooting at will, but I'm locked up during games. Only about half-way through the game do I start to calm down, or if we are ahead by a bunch of goals. It's to the point where I'm considering drinking a beer before each game to get that loose feeling. Has anyone here tried anti-anxiety medication or beta-blockers?

 

[grapes55]

Can relate all to well to what the OP is going through. Last year was just a train wreck in terms of my anxiety influencing how I played and reacted on the ice. I had a great start to the year, I was feeling confident in my abilities and really felt in control when I was out there. Then all of a sudden my confidence was just shot, which I now think was due to rapidly changing circumstances in my life (applying to universities, saying goodbye to friends, last year of competitive hockey etc.) in addition to my existing social anxiety. No matter how I played or what I did I just felt like every single mistake was just weighing me down and I had a lot of trouble enjoying the game. Will definitely be checking out Hockey Tough which a few posters suggested.

 

[Ratboy]

As a guy who has suffered severe anxiety I may be able to help.

There are two types of anxiety , which can exist together (psychological vs. chemical). Basically thought process or an overactive nervous system.

Since you also have OCD, I think there are nervous system/brain pathway components to your issue. There are ways to calm the nervous system, breathing, meditation, herbs and drugs.

I don't know if it would help you before a game to calm your nervous system, but when I would play shows (as a drummer) I found it helpful to take benzos. However I would recommend something herbal instead, if you can avoid pharmaceuticals I highly recommend to do so.

Things you can try are; chamomile, valerian root, passionflower, kava-kava, but above all remember to breathe fully, with your stomach. Maybe when you hit the bench to catch your breath make sure to take a breath for 4, hold for 4, release for 4 , it helps. and avoid stimulants, like caffeine, or even tobacco (yeah its a stimulant).

Psychologically I can tell you, it's just a game. I know it matters to us, and it's important to perform well, but you can't perform if you're beating yourself up. In a way try to understand, you're just as worthy as anyone else to play the game, and to be you. That includes the good, and the bad. All players make good and bad plays, the ying and yang of sports, it's really all part of the experience of life.

I honestly don't know if any of this is really helpful, but I'm tired AF right now, and I used to get anxiety before playing a game too. Funny thing is, the best game I ever played was the day after I did shrooms with a buddy and stayed up all night playing Wii, the next day I woke up, my brain was so clear, and I could see and read the play so easily, scored the winning goal, you know what, I'm tired.

If you can, listen to Marconi - Union. It's a song scientists designed to be the "most relaxing" possible.

Good luck to you.